The difference between guilt is shame is important here. Guilt is feeling that you messed up, shame is the feeling that you are less of a person for it. Ideally, we learn that continuing to beat ourselves up about our past behaviors only makes the problem worse. For me, how I feel about myself is directly related to urges to gamble. I must give myself some credit for getting away and not continuing to make a bad situation worse.
Acceptance is realizing in our hearts that there is absolutely nothing we can do to change the past.
It helps to try not to live in the past or the future and stay present in the moments of today, and doing the next right thing. One day at a time.

I have had the same feelings about all the things I could have had, done, etc. I realize now that I have always been someone who wants instant gratification. I constantly have to remind myself that it will take time to get healthy financially. When that time comes I will be able to catch up on some of the things that passed me by while my life was on hold in that dark place. Until then, I'm giving myself very small rewards that I can afford while I dig myself out of the hole.

IMO, you are giving your family the greatest gift of all - yourself. All else really doesn't matter all that much compared to that. :-))

One can always look back and ask what if. If it is the money that haunts us, remember it is just dirty paper. I believe that we feel cheated because we can not gamble like other people and that is what drives us crazy. I never gambled for the money,just the action. Money was just a tool that you needed to gamble,to shoot up your drug,no different than a junkie putting that needle in his or hers arm. You can always work and get the money back if that what drives you but you can NEVER get back the wasted years and memories. So extremely pathetic.

I think it's about progress, not perfection. What I'm saying is that it's better you quit now than after another decade or two. Think of the he money you have saved, not the money you have spent. Think of the time you will have with your family and friends not being in the casino, not the time you have wasted. You can't do anything about the time and money that is gone, but you can invest in your future starting today.

How well I too know the empty pocket syndrome. Having to delay appointments because I did not have the required copays. The thousands I threw away...are just that .....thrown away.
I absolutely love cars...I dont mean new cars, or luxury csrs, but the enjoyment comes from searching the internet, going to car lots to compare features, body style, etc tesr driving then getting the best deal I could negotiate. Well today I stopped by a car lot having a major sale. I knew the business was closed so I could browse without being followed by those "sales people". Much to my surprise one of the employees was there checking the alarm. I was very honest about my financial situation as it is now and my efforts to re right my ship. He showed me "THE CAR" that included my "wants" plus a whole lot more and he outlined steps that would have me in that car...the 30 day plan or the 6 month plan. I have a goal now...I am going to meet that goal one day and one dollar at a time. Baby steps...eating the elephant..

For me it was about the action, but hell it was about the money too.....If I was playing blackjack for pretzel sticks Im not sure I would have been an addict

I believe the money was a way to keep score, giving one a sense of power when they had it and a feeling of desperation when it was gone. I have been to high limit card games when one person would win all the money at the table and then proceed to lend it out to just keep the game going. Unreal.