Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...
So I have many things that remind me of gambling. This post is about my purse and wallet. I bought my purse to take to Vegas. Cute bright red crossover. My wallet I bought after a big win. Every day I lug these things around with me. A constant reminder as I get MONEY and things in and out of it all day long.
Just so happens that I won a drawing this week. It was just a random drawing at work that did not require any money to enter. I signed up while registering for annual benefits. I won a $25 gift certificate. I used the gift certificate to purchase a new purse and wallet. I had seen this purse and wallet on clearance while out with my daughter last weekend.
I got rid of the old reminders and replaced them with something that is a reminder of something "normal" and good. Now I will think about my outing with my daughter and the benefits I am so thankful to have through my job.
Something little.... But for me it's big. I got to thinking about the things I have that remind me of gambling. There are many. Most things have to do with lucky or unlucky clothing.... Or things I purchased after a good win. And memories that tricked me into thinking I had those machines figured out. While I focus on getting my life back together I see all of these things as reminders of the trap (thanks for the perfect term Marie) and I look forward to dumping them and replacing them with healthy and fun memories and things.
Just so happens that I won a drawing this week. It was just a random drawing at work that did not require any money to enter. I signed up while registering for annual benefits. I won a $25 gift certificate. I used the gift certificate to purchase a new purse and wallet. I had seen this purse and wallet on clearance while out with my daughter last weekend.
I got rid of the old reminders and replaced them with something that is a reminder of something "normal" and good. Now I will think about my outing with my daughter and the benefits I am so thankful to have through my job.
Something little.... But for me it's big. I got to thinking about the things I have that remind me of gambling. There are many. Most things have to do with lucky or unlucky clothing.... Or things I purchased after a good win. And memories that tricked me into thinking I had those machines figured out. While I focus on getting my life back together I see all of these things as reminders of the trap (thanks for the perfect term Marie) and I look forward to dumping them and replacing them with healthy and fun memories and things.
Thanks for your post.
penny
One of the biggest ones was getting a new wallet. A fellow gambler at the casino once told me years ago to carry a red wallet, because, as he said, "Opposites attract, and red will attract the green." I've bought and carried three or four red wallets over that time.
Once I quit, I moved to carrying a green wallet. It's a psychological change. I don't know if there is any truth to opposite colors attracting, but seeing the green wallet makes me pause at times.
I also don't have the shame I had with red wallets. I have memories of maxing out credit cards on cash advances with a red wallet. Coming home in a stupor and hiding all of the ATM receipts I had carelessly stuffed in a red wallet. Running to the casino with $1200-9000 in a red wallet and leaving with nothing in a red wallet.
The green wallet is a fresh start, a new beginning.
I still have little things I bought while feeling depressed from the casino gift shops using comps. Some of them are hard to get rid of, but it is also hard knowing that I spent $1000-2000 for something like a $20 dog figurine or a $10 little piece of wall art. But I still do have those.
I had my clothing attire that I wore, because it would go right into the washing machine when I got home. Red shirt, red sweat shirt or red hoodie. (I didn't know the red attract the green thing) I have not worn these tops at all lately. I am actually not sure where they are. Because these tops had to go right in the washer, I had my cell phone in my hoodie. I washed it. UGGGG. Somehow I was okay with this, because I took my winning and bought another phone. Throw in a tablet while I was at it. $600. How stupid. I would not have washed my phone if I would not have been in such a panic that my husband would get home a smell my clothes.
No red t-shirt. No red sweat shirt. No red hoodie.
Oh it just accrued to me why I don't ware them. Because they are junkie looking and I dress better now that I like myself again.
I use to dress bad, because I felt bad.
I am going to go find them and throw them away.
Out of the trap for 49 days!