Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...
"Oh, what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive" poem by Sir Walter Scott. This poem seems so fitting to me a "closet" compulsive gambler. As a gambler I had to lie, then had to tell more lies to keep the lies from being found out, and the more caught up in the web of lies and deceit the worse I felt and the more I gambled. Its funny looking back because sometimes the web of lies I told I didn't even believe them myself (LOL). My family does not know that I have relapsed into compulsive gambling. It was 16 years ago that my compulsive gambling was exposed to my family. They loved me and supported me through the years of my recovery. It was only a few years ago that I began gambling again and it spiraled out of control in a mere 9 months. I am back to exactly where I was 16 years ago. But today I am 7 days gamble free. I know recovery is the only way to happiness again for me. Right now it is hard to imagine because I am so new again to my recovery. But it is time to start unraveling the web so that I can be free again of this addiction. Today I choose to be gamble free because I have a choice. Take care xoxoxo Chargergirl
Your story is similar to mine... very similar.
I had a tough time 20 years or so ago and got myself out with love and support and the occasional bailout from family, primarily, and friends. The problem is that this is really something that only WE know and, after time, the problem fades, slowly but surely until there isn't "that look" that I'm sure we've all gotten from one time or another when those trying to keep an eye out for us, keep an eye on us. What's worse is that feeling gets us eventually, too. Some sooner than others, some longer, but alone we all get a little forgetful and find ourselves at some point in some place at just the right or wrong moment and bang- right back in like we never left...
I'm certainly not the guys with the most time in abstinence, nor do I feel I have all the answers, but I can tell you that without a doubt getting the support from other compulsive gamblers is invaluable. Having DS has been especially indispensable- the ability to log on whenever you can, the breadth of love and support from so many, the breadth of experience- it really can't be beat. The exception, for me anyway, is GA- the face-to-face connection is also indispensable, as well. There are so many facets to recovery programs of all sorts, so take as much as you can from as many as you can.
For gambling, a friend encapsulated it very nicely- in the beginning, and really all the way along if you can do nothing other than 2 things- don't lie and don't gamble, you'll get through. Very simplistic, but so very true and so very much at the bottom of your post. Break the web and the spider runs...
Take care,
Jay