Anniversaries are always triggering for me, even when things are going well. So if they're already shaky, it can be a very dangerous time. It has helped me in the past to write out the whole scenario of what would happen if I went out, from how I'd feel walking in to what it would be like to play and then *especially* how miserable I'd feel leaving the place, because even if I won I would give it all back and more. That's just a given for a gambling addict like me. I encourage you to do whatever you can to cope until this passes --- give your money to someone else to hold, take a lot of walks, call some friends, bake something good...whatever works for you as long as it's not gambling. The thing I tend to forget when I'm in the crisis is that it will pass, even though that's hard to believe while it's happening. Stay strong and know that we're with you.

thanks yestorecovery, that helps.

Great answer, it has to pass or we would all be out there in action everyday.

Congratulations on a year healing57
Allowing the urge to pass is a perfect option, because pass it will. Life isn’t easy under the best of circumstances, but life living in an addiction is as bad as it gets, it never gets easier. These urges you are feeling are a symptom of your addiction, or a part of it you’re going to have to deal with in order to lead a better life. Let the freedom of not gambling become a light in your life, you’re doing this one day at a time. I know it’s not easy, I struggle with my depression sometimes getting in my way. I’m sorry you’re having financial struggles, but gambling isn’t the answer at all, not even a little.
Stay strong and keep posting

I know the urge is overwhelming, just remember the chase is not the answer. Journal and the urge will pass. Stay strong, you can do this.

WTG healing57 on the year. It has helped me to write out a plan to do something besides gamble for each and every one of my triggers.