Hello, it does get easier, at least for me it did because I started putting myself first and making sure I was ok first. The secret is to stop beating yourself up. To take it one day at a time or one step at a time. What's done is done and you can't change the past. But you can work really hard on to make it easier on yourself. Only then will your future looks promising. So let the anxiety go, decide your going to be ok!! Then fill your free time with things, take walks, puzzles, I did that it's a great distraction movies, join a gym anything! Your only a prisoner in your own home if you allow yourself to be. Call in on Wednesday nights, find a meeting, but the most important thing you can do is stop beating yourself up and move forward.. you are not alone, you have all of us on here, at meetings, the ga hotline, there's always someone to listen... God Bless you

tohope4 said it. You will need to befriend yourself to defeat this addiction. The withdrawals last for from 90 to 120 days. There is also post acute withdrawal syndrome that some of us go through for up to 2 years after quitting. The initial 90-120 days is usually the hardest. Artwork, even coloring in a coloring book, or anything creative can relieve the anxiety. Starting a gratitude diary by just writing down one thing per day that you are grateful for, can go a long ways towards feeling better. It took a long time to get where you are and you cannot repair everything immediately. When you feel a little better you can rekindle your hobbies, find new ones and rekindle friendships or make efforts to meet healthy people. All is not lost, you are no worse than any other compulsive gambler. The money is the least of your troubles even though it may seem like the biggest right now. Take a deep breath and walk cautiously, with intention and you will make it.

IT DOES GET BETTER.... I promise you, it gets better. Reading your post, just brought back so much for me. You have no idea. During my times I was in recovery, then, out back out, it was those days that were the toughest for me to get through. The lonely days, the days I would think about gambling and nothing more. Of course, it took me several years before I finally figured it out. That in order for me to be in recovery, and see, it gets better, I had to get to the other side. In order to get to the other side, I had to learn, not to act on my addictive brain trying to convince me it was okay to go and place another bet, or fantasize about winning big, etc. You know the drill. I also had to get through to the other side in order to see, that although I destroyed myself financing, it was going to be ok. As long as I didn't place another bet, one day at a time, it started to get better, actually, it got pretty amazing. My personal life improved, family life improved, and slowly my financial situation started to improve. BUT, I had to literally just do one thing. NOT PLACE ANOTHER BET. If you can get to a meeting, sit with others that are going through what you are going through, that may help, it was a huge help for me. Read, read a lot. Clean your home, take a hot bath, go for a long, long, long walk. And if you can just take a moment, as you aren't sitting in a casino, to look around you, no matter where you are in your life, and smile, because you are a warrior. You are fighting the good fight, be proud of yourself, be proud of yourself. Don't listen to the addiction, remember, nothing good can come from going, nothing good. But, if you stay put, if you work on your recovery, I promise you, it gets better.

I came on this site when I was 13 days clean asking the same questions. I am gamble free almost 9 months now and rarely think about it. What I learned was that I was going through was normal. I had very bad withdrawal. As quitforgood said it takes 90 to 120 days for it to get better. Reading about addiction and especially gambling addiction really helped me to understand what I was going through. I was feeling really, really bad physically and mentally. I used the journal on here to write myself private entries a lot and now when I have an urge to gamble I go back and look at them and remember the pain I had to get through to be where I am now. Everything gets better even the money. It all works out. You just have to get through the days one day at a time. Pray for the desire to gamble to leave you. Read old posts on here they are very helpful . You can do this!

We're all so very different when it comes to this addiction. I've lived in Vegas for a long time, I even went to high school here. High school, that was a long time ago! I can remember dressing up and going out to dinner and a show without any thoughts whatsoever of gambling, I wasn't even 21! Vegas was a different place, way back then. I remember actually being bored waiting for my boyfriend while he played a few hands of blackjack. A few... just a few. I'd go grocery shopping with my mom and stand by as she put her change from shopping in a slot machine, just her coin change, sometimes she'd win like five bucks! Whoa, I know! How strange it is to think about those times now, my boyfriend and my mom never became complusive gamblers. But I did. And to me It's weird that I can't really pin point when this happened to me? But it did.
So believe me when I say I know the pain associated with this disease of the mind. I've spent days feeling like a robot, just going through the motions of being alive, waiting for an opportunity to slip away and gamble, trying to wish my disease away, wishing I could gamble like a normal person, feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't.
Today I look at the whole mess and know the reasons I'm a compulsive gambler just don't matter anymore. What does matter is that my desire not to gamble doesn't have to ruin my life. I know I'll never be that bored person again, standing off to the side waiting for a normal gambler to play a few coins or a couple hands of cards. Why? Because I'm exactly like any other addict, I must refrain from placing that next bet. That's it. That's what I must do in order to lead a better life. And it can only be done one day at a time, sometimes one moment at a time.
It's not easy, not at all. But the truth is it does get easier with time. Please allow yourself the time to feel better, I know it can be achieved. Peace & Love