Welcome. First you have to stop gambling. Just pick a day and stick to it. Coming here is a great start. Going to a GA meeting would also help. The first couple of meetings are hard but then you will be glad you went. You can do this. There is a wealth of information on this board. Read it all it has a lot of tools to get you started and keep you going. The first few months will be hard but just do it one day at a time. You can do anything for one day.

One GA meeting is not enough to make a sweeping judgement that it is of no help. My counselor suggests that people go to 30 meetings in 30 days and THEN decide if it is of any help. Obviously 30 meetings in 30 days is in a bigger metropolitan area than you are located. But if there is any one concept that can help you need to get the information and use it to your advantage. Take what helps and ignore the rest - but very unfair to suggest it won't help based on one meeting. Private treatment or specific treatment for gambling should be available. the 1 800 Gambler number is the California Problem gambling network - there is also a nationwide National Council on Problem Gambling (1-800-522-4700) They can direct you to any nearby counselors that specialize in problem gambling and tell you if counseling is subsidized in your state. Groups such as AA and NA or CODA are 12 step groups that also have open meetings, that while they do not deal directly with Gambling can still be helpful.(Many of the steps and concepts are similar - you just need to replace the word alcoholic, drug addict or codependent with gambler in your head.)
Getting between you and your money, putting up some blocks and self-banning from gambling establishments is the best thing you can do early on. Next reclaim some of your old interests, hobbies and joys in life. Take a class, volunteer somewhere, indulge in artwork, read about this addiction, educate yourself, rekindle friendships, rekindle hobbies, you will need everything you have to fight this battle.
The first step is admitting you have a problem and is often the hardest - but it is the most important step as none of the others can come before it and it is the day you decided to do something different.

Hi dawizz,
Welcome to our little group of addicts. When you wrote about your husband encouraging you to gamble I was a little bit shocked. My husband despises the thought of me gambling, I've put him through too much. So many lies, and he had to live with me in my zombie state, I don't know how he puts up with my addiction. Does your husband understand gambling is hurting you? Have you been honest with him about your feelings and your panic over your loses? I'm sorry I sound so nosy, that isn't my intention. I just think it would help you a lot if your husband really understood what you're going through, although it's not an easy addiction to understand. My husband doesn't understand this addiction, he just hates me to gamble and knows I hate doing it. What a situation to me in, poor guy.
As far as using gambling to deal with pain, it doesn't work, that's our addiction lying to us. Gambling isn't any part of pain management. I have R/A, when I gambled I hurt all over and tried to convince myself I didn't care.
Whatever you do, don't give up on yourself. Find out what makes you tick by living a life you want to live.

Thank you every one that has taken the time to reply to my post here.

Robin, yes, it is bothersome to me that my husband does not seem to care. He has never handled the money, made that is why? He doesn't bring much in with his Social Security check so maybe he just doesn't care being HIS NEEDS are being met?
I have not gambled since I posted here. I am trying to find better things to do with my time.
Today I had to take my husband for surgery and we had a few hrs. to kill. Instead of going to the local casino, I suggested we go to a matinee instead. So that is what we did and he did not enjoy the movie (nor did I) but it was only $13.50 spent on that plus $6.50 for coffee/danish earlier.

As we did not end up at the casino and I had more time to kill later in the day and opted to do some necessary grocery shopping instead of driving to the casino while he has the eye surgery (this has been going on since 2008 and is ever 3 mos. or so).

I often get home when I've been out gambling at 3 or 4 a.m. in the morning and he seems not to care!

I feel that is one of my problems. Does anyone care at all?

I am now thinking about hitting up my IRA as I do not have enough money to live on. Gambling should be out of the picture you'd think. I am so very tired of my very boring life with no one in it that seems to be a friend, etc. All of the "friends" I do have are "casino friends" and well, you know what that is like (here today, hitting you up for money and gone tomorrow).

Thanks again for your thoughts and ideas. I am glad I am not alone with this struggle.

It became out of hand last year after my beloved cat was poisoned. I had a nervous break down I think and I found myself at the casinos too often losing way too much. I have debts now because of it and had to take out a loan to cover it (again, my husband is disinterested in this). Such a bizarre situation I am in.

At least I have not gambled. That is the positive side of this. I hope you do not mind if I check in periodically! Thanks again everyone! Glad I am NOT ALONE!

Hi I'm glad I'm not alone in this addiction. Last time I gamble was June 3/17. I've been gambling since 1998. Its to the point where I'm gambling daily so I decide to come here and post. Read posts to see if I can get help as well.

dawizz,
I know it would be a better situation for you if your husband understood what's going on in your head, but he doesn't, and that's not the worse thing that could happen. The worse thing that can happen is if you give up on yourself. One day at a time works wonders! I'd say a bad movie is 100% better than hurting yourself again. Good job! Now keep going... one day at a time.