Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...
Hmmm, where do I begin.
I signed up on this site a couple of years ago. I had gotten divorced and starting gambling for fun with friends. Then I started gambling online by myself and that really eased the pain. I got into severe debt and had to have my wonderful parents bail me out. They had to lend me approx $50k out of their savings and home equity. My God what was I thinking that this was ok. I had never been this person before, I was responsible and controlled and always paid my bills on time. I was that way for 42 years. Then i fell down hard. So will them bailing me out i was able to breath again, things were tight but better.
Then i met a wonderful man, everything i ever dreamed of. He knew of my debt and i told him it was my past. Of course he believed in me and took me and my debt on (40k) , we were married last summer.
So now i have a wonderful man with a great job, a nicer house then i have ever had in my life and love like i never thought i could have. But i could not stop the gambling over the last year. Of course i have hidden it well, constantly juggling money around trying to meet and hide the bills. I have incurred another $27000 in debt that he does not even know about. I have gotten more credit cards in my name, my daughters name and his name. I am so very sick with this. I have even won enough recently to pay all of this off, but i ended up reversing the payouts and played them out. How could i be so stupid? I spent money that was my daughters for her next car. This makes me ill, i love that child so much, how could i do this?
When i sit here and write this its like i am two different people. I cant even imagine i have done this damage. You would never guess this by looking at me, I'm embarressed, mortified and just sick.
I cant take this anymore, i want to be normal again before i ever started this 4 years ago. I am scared i am going to lose my husband, he is such a good man, he deserves better than this. I want to go to him, tell him i need help but i am so afraid he will just ask me to leave. We have built a life together with our families(daughters) over the past two years and i don't want to lose it.
Please someone help me, I am at the bottom today, I want to be healthy and happy again.
I appreciate any thoughts.
I signed up on this site a couple of years ago. I had gotten divorced and starting gambling for fun with friends. Then I started gambling online by myself and that really eased the pain. I got into severe debt and had to have my wonderful parents bail me out. They had to lend me approx $50k out of their savings and home equity. My God what was I thinking that this was ok. I had never been this person before, I was responsible and controlled and always paid my bills on time. I was that way for 42 years. Then i fell down hard. So will them bailing me out i was able to breath again, things were tight but better.
Then i met a wonderful man, everything i ever dreamed of. He knew of my debt and i told him it was my past. Of course he believed in me and took me and my debt on (40k) , we were married last summer.
So now i have a wonderful man with a great job, a nicer house then i have ever had in my life and love like i never thought i could have. But i could not stop the gambling over the last year. Of course i have hidden it well, constantly juggling money around trying to meet and hide the bills. I have incurred another $27000 in debt that he does not even know about. I have gotten more credit cards in my name, my daughters name and his name. I am so very sick with this. I have even won enough recently to pay all of this off, but i ended up reversing the payouts and played them out. How could i be so stupid? I spent money that was my daughters for her next car. This makes me ill, i love that child so much, how could i do this?
When i sit here and write this its like i am two different people. I cant even imagine i have done this damage. You would never guess this by looking at me, I'm embarressed, mortified and just sick.
I cant take this anymore, i want to be normal again before i ever started this 4 years ago. I am scared i am going to lose my husband, he is such a good man, he deserves better than this. I want to go to him, tell him i need help but i am so afraid he will just ask me to leave. We have built a life together with our families(daughters) over the past two years and i don't want to lose it.
Please someone help me, I am at the bottom today, I want to be healthy and happy again.
I appreciate any thoughts.
Its funny once you start researching then you find info on people that became compulsive and started gambling too much or i also read some people shop compulsively.
I wish i would have know this could be a possibility. I am not saying that this is my whole cause but it would have been nice to know!