Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group
Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...
This week I've missed work because I went binge gambling again. I've been struggling with compulsive gambling for about 6 years. It's ruined me financially and psychologically. Every day I want to gamble, and yet while I'm doing it, I play until I lose and hating myself on the drive home.
I never thought I'd become a compulsive gambler. It's as if I'm some kind of Manchurian candidate when I relapse. How does that happen? I'm questioning if what Im doing is a side effect from anti depressants prescribed from my doctor? I've read that certain medications can amplify compulsive behaviors. It's a fine balance. On one hand, the prescriptions help me to live a somewhat productive life. I can get up in the morning and force myself everyday to work in a high stress environment. On the other side, I find that I feel sadly empty inside and can't see where I'm going in life or plan for in the future.
Has anyone else experienced something similar? I started my job almost 8 years ago, needed to be on antidepressants to even continue keeping the job, and then eventually during this time became addicted to gambling as an outlet.
Regarding your antidepressants, I'd suggest looking up side effects online, and/or talking with your doc about the possibility they are making it harder for you. I also take antidepressants, but mine are not the type that have compulsive gambling as a potential side effect.
Also try directed the hate toward the industry instead of at yourself. There are constantly happy sounding commercials for casinos near where I live. Slot machines are designed to be addictive.
I've learned through my recover journey is that you have to do whatever it takes to take care your well being. This includes anything that is having a negative effect on your physical, psychological and emotional being.
I know it is easier said than done. However it can be simple if you tackle those one at a time without complicating by worrying about the outcome.
One day at a time my friend, your worth is more than anything you can ever buy..
It's going to be alright.
Love,
Victoria
Thanks for your insightful advice and empathy. I'm starting to realize that more and more that it takes a real life change to recover, which includes changing the how I view myself and my priorities. It's more than just about running away and escape via gambling. (The false advertisements from casinos are everywhere nowadays. )
Perhaps its about me changing the perception of how to view money, and letting that to become too important as a commodity in measuring success and self worth. It's shallow at best. There was a time in my life before where I felt ok, but that was before compromising happiness in order to stay with my current job.
I don't want for you to go off of your antidepressant, but maybe your doc can suggest alternatives. Maybe a holistic practitioner would find an herb tincture would benefit you.
No matter what -- on the drug or off -- you have to fight one of the biggest battles of your life and you have to know YOU ARE WORTH IT. You and your life are worth the tremendous uphill battle that fighting addiction is. And it's scary and uncertain and uncomfortable and unpleasant, but I can honestly promise you the journey will bring more rewards than detriments. I promise.