Gambling Addiction & Recovery Support Group

Compulsive gambling is an urge or addiction to gamble despite harmful negative consequences or a desire to stop. A preferred term among many professionals is problem gambling, as few people described by the term experience true compulsions in the clinical sense of the word. Problem gambling often is defined by whether harm is experienced by the gambler or others rather...

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Consequences

fromthisday
fromthisday
I am feeling great with my recovery. I finally hit my wall and opened my eyes to what a problem I have had over the last two years. I realize I have been a compulsive gambler and put myself in complete jeopordy financially. I have been a sliver of the perrson I once was for 42 years. I have not recognized who I am but now I have realized just how sick I became.

I am so excited to start getting my life back and control and self respect. I am starting to feel like the person I used to be before this addiction took its hold on me.

I have also talked to my parents about needing their help to consolidate my bills so that I can start to recover financially. They are so disappointed and hurt, it has really hit them hard. I am just mortified at my behavior over the past 2 years. As hard as this has been I knew I needed to do it to try to come back from all of this damage. It is my only way, it is either that or bankruptcy. They are in the process of thinking about it, they are scared to beliieve that I have a grip on this and will not fall again and then they will be left with a 55k loan.

What do I say or do to help them have the faith they need in me? Does anyone have any advice for me? I would really appreciate anyones thoughts on this.

Thanks
newstarttoday
newstarttoday
Hi From this day, you sound a lot like me . I am a divorced mother of two children as well. I would like to give you this advice. Have your parents pay your bills with the loan they give you. One of the things that I have found so challenging is that when I have money I continue to gamble. I have asked my grown daughters to hold my credit card for me. I have to remember that quitting gambling is really hard. Good luck and peace and love to you.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I agree with NewStart...have them pay off your bills. I can't tell you how many times I have had a loan to pay off bills, and either used some if not all of it to gamble with. I think you need to put some "safeguards" in place for yourself and them...maybe let them monitor your funds for a while...give them a copy of your monthly bank statement and an explanation of any "cash" that was taken out. Take them with you when you put yourself on the self exclusion list at the casinos and if you gamble online...get gamblock.

You have good parents...my dad would in no way bail me out...wouldn't even take the time to think about it...sometimes in order to learn the lesson, we have to go through the pain of digging our way out it.

Keep me posted...glad you are on the road to a fresh start.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Fromthisday,

Gambling along with my immature attitude in my mid 20s and early 30s caused me to rack up $85,000 in debt. I was scared, and didn't know what to do. I was fortunate to tune into a radio show 22 months ago listening to a guy I never heard of, Dave Ramsey. It totally changed my life. I stopped gambling and with his plan I am debt free as of last month. During those 22 months were difficult, I was living very frugal and saving pennies using every one it to attack this mountain of debt. I never thought i could be debt free, in such a short time. You can do it, anybody can. You can find him on Stichter or I heart radio all free, you can even google Dave Ramsey and he has daily shows on his sites for free.

22 months of living frugal was hard, everyone around me was buying nice cars, fancy wallets, dining out while I drove my reliable bucket with over 220K miles, and lived like a broke college student even though I was earning some money. I am glad I went through it. Now I can do things that other people around me couldn't. His famous phrases "Live like no one else, so later on you live and give like no one else." Good luck.
2mcdphnurse
2mcdphnurse
good job gamerecovery. I love Dave Ramsey. He also has a CD that you can listen to in your car to help get rid of the debt. Also good job to fromthisday. What a great job you have done. You can do it. To find that peace with out gambling is a wonderful thing.
flowir
flowir
Show your parents you are serious by being responsible with money. Their willingness to help you is a blessing. Be strong!
fromthisday
fromthisday
Thank you to all of you for your replys. I really appreciate them! My parents are still thinking about it, coming to a decision tomorrow so we'll see. I'm scared and nervous if they are not willing to help, the only way out is probably bankruptcy. But I'm also excited at the thought that I actually may be able to start working on fixing this if they are willing to help.

I will also be looking up Dave Ramsey, thanks for that info!
jayd03
jayd03
Some great advice here- especially the part about having your parents manage your bills. I can't tell you how badly a bail out can be, especially early on in a recovery. It can give you a false feeling of getting past the "problem" and giving you the green light to get out there and pay everything off with that one big win- it NEVER happens. It's sort of a karma thing for me: if you want it too much, it will never happen. If you move on, pick yourself up and do the right things, slowly, you will recover and, in time, you will repay your debts, with interest, real or spiritual, in kind.
All the best,
Jay