11/22/17 was the day I got my life back. I am a few months behind on my bills however I am calm, because I know now I can dig myself out of debt and not into it. Last Friday was the first Friday i can remeber in some time in which, my paycheck was mine. What a great feeling. Although I owed every dollar, it was still mine, and the casino didnt and couldnt get to it first. Now i am looking forward to Fridays, getting my pay and coming out of debt. Treating myself to something small like starbucks once in a while.
In 12 days, I find myself focused more than usal. In 12 days, I seem to be laughing more than usal, doing a few things around the house, over all having a life. When I talk to my family member who gambles, I have other conversation and if gambling comes up, I change the subject becasue i dont want to hear who won what at the casino. I work a part time job and i am looking forward to that paycheck to be mine as well. I still have to pay my bills, but not having money after all the bills are paid is a much greater feeling that not having money after you left it in th casino. Its a much happier feeling.
In the 12 days I get the urge and laugh to myself becasue I self excluded, and no I wouldnt risk arrest. I dont believe my mugshot would be flattering. lol. Arrest scares me more the finaicial ruins that gambling has gotten me into, thats why self excluison was best for me. When my over due bills come or I get that call, I want to run down and hope to hit big, knowing I would put it all back in plus. But day by day, my urges will pass gradually. I will stay strong and I will not gamble today.
12 days and counting,
It was last Sunday and I decided I wanted a manicure. I’m going to be going out of town for a few days with my daughter and her two little ones, for a visit with my sister, and a trip to the LA Zoo. Anyway, back to my manicure. I went to a place I had never been to before, but it was close by, so I thought I’d try it out. A guy did my nails. There was a bit of a communication...
I know there is no such thing as kind of relapsing. Here is what happened and I need help sorting it out and getting back on track. I stopped gambling June 2016. It was hard but it was easier than I expected. I did a lot of recovery. 2 groups a week, counseling and this forum. I will add that I have always still played non gambling card and board games, I know some people can't do that but...