Foster Care Support Group
Foster care is a system by which a certified, stand-in parent(s) cares for minor children or young peoples who have been removed from their birth parents or other custodial adults by state authority. Responsibility for the young person is assumed by the relevant governmental authority and a placement with another family found.
Hello! We finally got our first placement today (after being licensed since August). I think she'll fit into our family okay, but we immediately expected an unexpected snag.
Our Internet rules are pretty simple:
* We get the passwords and will check usage on a semi-regular basis.
The problem is that we came up with these rules with the idea that kids would be using our computer. She came with her own laptop and feel like this is a violation of her property. She is also sixteen, so age is a factor as well.
My husband and I are going to talk it over and we asked her to think of ways we could monitor her Internet usage without her feeling like we were violating her privacy. I was thinking that maybe a periodic check of her computer history would work.
Does anybody have any other ideas? I want to make sure she is being safe, but I also don't want to push her away by immediately starting a fight over this.
We did explain that this was for her safety rather than about us not trusting her.
Our Internet rules are pretty simple:
* We get the passwords and will check usage on a semi-regular basis.
The problem is that we came up with these rules with the idea that kids would be using our computer. She came with her own laptop and feel like this is a violation of her property. She is also sixteen, so age is a factor as well.
My husband and I are going to talk it over and we asked her to think of ways we could monitor her Internet usage without her feeling like we were violating her privacy. I was thinking that maybe a periodic check of her computer history would work.
Does anybody have any other ideas? I want to make sure she is being safe, but I also don't want to push her away by immediately starting a fight over this.
We did explain that this was for her safety rather than about us not trusting her.
My suggestion is to let her prove herself. You can check the history on her computer anytime if you have a concern. Perhaps place a limit on the time she uses it or during certain hours. But from a former foster kid who was never trusted by anyone, give her a chance to prove herself first and go from there.
After all she just might be using the computer for things like homework, or facebook to keep in contact with what friends she may have.
Just an opinion from someone who has been through the foster home thing.
Best wishes!