Long before the pandemic and isolation my eating habits changed and turned for the worst. I think it was mid thirties (I’m 45 now). First time I started overeating I justified it as a hangover side effect, lower sugar due to drinking night before, so body seeks replacement to lowered sugar. But stopped drinking completely, now 5 years sober, and my eating habits haven’t changed. So what do I conclude? Personally I think it’s my overall diet habits changed. I remember very well, it was a habit that developed after meeting a friend who enjoyed food and talked about passionately. I am not blaming her, at all. I think it is my mindless decision to follow footsteps of someone else without thinking to myself how it can affect me. I never liked cheese until that year, never had more than one portion of carbs a day, two meals in total until that year.. was it by choice or strict discipline? I think it was a bit of both. I naturally loved greens and veg in my diet, more than meats, but I also grew up with awareness that, fried food, sweets, tinned food, carbs.. are what causes Obecity when consumed too regularly in larger than necessary quanitities, so moderation is  key. But given that I’m an all or nothing, at least when it comes to food and drink attitude, and I knew long before since childhood I had a very addictive nature, therefore I always controlled my diet and avoided purchasing sweets except one day a week, that was my rule in my entire twenties, and I successfully maintained a very slim healthy figure. Add to that I used to go out dancing a lot, and always followed a certain workout system during the day at least twice a week, yoga, kick boxing etc. so there were many reasons that supported the slim figure. But I also was more optimistic and a happier person back then, even when suffered some mild depression episodes I hid it well, I was busy, had so many friends, had big dreams and believed I will get them all.

10-20 years later, a massive change in attitude. The happy person is a very inactive unemployed person who spends a lot of hours sitting down, especially during this isolation, and I am eating for fun! Every half an hour!!!!! I’m eating so much... and not feeling full.. I’m not getting that satisfactory feeling. I know why, if my diet is unhealthy I never achieve that sense of satisfaction after eating. That feeling I only get when I eat a nice side dish of of some sort of salad and/or steamed veg, and plenty of water! Also when I wait till I’m really hungry before allowing myself to eat.. 

i know what I have to do, but struggling to do it, because now I’m officially eating for fun/when bored/when angry, when I’m depressed.. using food to stimulate my brain and add some excitement to my days.

where to from here? It has to stop!! Only way to stop will not be abrupt decision and commitment, I have to plan this: and I’m writing here so hopefully letting it out in the open will act as a motivation that encourages to behave myself a little and be more mindful about it from moment when I wake up. Steps I’m going to take in the next few days, starting now:

1- today as I’ve had breakfster and lunch and many snacks already, will stop eating till evening when I only have a soup. (Soups always fill me up).. and I actually love soups whether it’s summer or winter anytime anywhere, so this will be exciting to prepare, simple, whatever I find in the fridge, just put it together and make a soup.

2- tomorrow: and every day from now. Breakfast and two meals only. 

Breakfast. I’m allowed to have whatever I want, whatever is available.

3- lunch four hours later. Not before. Eat whatever I have available, right now cannot be too picky or selective about what’s available. 

4- again, 4 hours later, not a minute before, except if I feel really and honestly very hungry by then. And that’s it for the day. 

In between. Snacking will stop. Except when necessary I’m allowed to consume the following and only that!

1- a fruit.

2- a cup of tea and a single piece of chocolate (only single piece, square inch). 

3- a handful of almonds or mixed nuts.  

And I can revise the above and come back to write another post when I’ve done the above if things change and I have liberty to select special ingredients and food, when things change of course.

and last but not least, I have to drink my water.. I’m doing badly there. I’ve always noticed, and I’ve read this too on health sites, dehydration creates a false sense of hunger.. so I must drink at least a liter of water a day. 

Will come back and write again with an update.

if you kindly took the time to read my post, and you are going through something similar, let’s try do this together, a sense of team work always give me so much encouragement, I hate doing dieting alone..or exercising alone.. would be great to help each other remain extra vigilant and take care of our health together. Wishing you all out there success in your journies.