Financial Challenges Support Group
This community is for people who are struggling to meet financial obligations of any kind. Financial challenges include everything from the day-to-day challenges of making ends meet to managing credit card debt to bankruptcy. Get support from others who are going through similar obstacles on the road back to financial stability.
I know I never got financial support going to college and even back then it was tough. My children understand with their parents divorce that I can support them even less. However, it doesn't make me feel any less of a failure when I hear friends who are taking care of all their children's schooling. I don't dislike them, I'm actually happy they can do so, but I find myself envious of them and disappointed in myself.
My ex of course is quick to remind me that my fiance and I NEED to help our children. I am offended that he expects me to but at the same time I wish I could afford to.
I know there are children out there that take out student loans. I know not everyone has college paid for. Call it my own personal guilt that I cannot provide for them.
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I need some plot development ideas for a book I'm writing. Here's the lead in:------@1630 she texted me, asking for gas money. "Are u at work? I have to work in a couple hours I don't have any gas barely I was wondering if u had 20$ by chance haven't been able to get any massages in I'm sorry to ask was just seeing"She agreed to meet me at the townhouse @1730. I asked her to call me before...
The really important thing you can do for your children is to support them emotionally and honestly with their own choices. I went to college far away from home, and the events that I remember best are the rare times when my folks could come to visit me. Until that time, without daily contact with my familiy, I did not realize how lonely I could be.
Another way you can help them, with financial aid for college, is looking for grant-funding sources to which they could apply. The privatatized student loan institutions have become a pernicious and predatory system of indentured servitude. The application procedures for callege grants are tedious and time-consuming, and most young people can use a little help with management of their time, and the occasional motivational assist.
In order to do this, you muas avoid become mired in self-doubt. It's not what happens to you that matters, but how you deal with it. Your ex sounds like an ass, by the way. I would try to keep a person like that out of my rosy picture.
Cheers!
Thank your for your words. As a mother I just want to do it all for my children.
I went to college on a grant, the rest was borrow government loan. I know I did it without my parents help but you always wish that you could do better for your kids. :)
My ex is his own kind of special. I do try as much as possible to not let him get me upset but he knows the best time to stick a knife to me is through guilt or each time the children are visiting me. As much as I would like him to disappear completely from my life, I can't because we are always going to be connected through our children.
Thank you for your POV. I actually hesitatedly avoided it, hoping to win the lottery when pigs fly. :P
But when he sent me the last text 'demanding' I talk to my children about how my fiance and I were going to financially support them, it upset me. I waited a few days but finally broke down and asked if they would like to go to college and stay with us. It would help them with food and board so all they had to worry about was student loan.
I did say I wish I could financially support them. They said they understand that they applied for a few grants and student loans. Said they understand and knew we paid for our own college and didn't get parental help either.
I just wanted them to be able to have a clean slate out of college without the pressure of having to just take any job that they were given so they can pay their college loans.
It just makes my heart heavy. :'(