Can I ask you one thing Why would you be trying to concieve and bring a child into this poverty type environment? If you can not afford a five dollar pair of sneakers for your son what makes you think you can afford a 30 dollar box of diapers that is not covered by welfare benes? I hope you head to the nearest health dept and get some free Birth control methods underway before you end up in a far more sadder predicament...
Ok I am sorry for the blunt truth but people really need to use their heads..Im reading your profile and that just makes no sense...Trying to concieve , infertility...is listed in your profile..Why would you be trying the such...Perhaps you need to look at the bigger picture yourself God does not want you to concieve while your in this predicament...At least thats what Id think he did give some of us brains and for those he didnt he sure gave them ears to listen to others...Im telling you it surely is not the right time to concieve.
Ok aside from your profile...We all have had hard times in our lives..You are not the only one who has had to use super glue to glue your kids shoes back together..Even though we make ok Money we still recycle...It wonderful for the environment and it might fill up the gas tank once in a while...No need to feel bad about that...Even applying for food stamp benes is recommended to you but hey if you really dont believe in that that is fine too...
Have you thought about posting extra work needed at the laundry mat, or on several post office mail boxes.
See if there are any food banks available in your area...Catholic charities also helps, as does the salvation army...Sit in the phone book and call several churches and see if they may be able to help you buy the such...Calvary Chapels help with food vouchers, and schooling in some areas for like bible college if your children are old enough...
Do you have a job? Seek part time employment just to fill in some time and make a little pay...Dont be ashamed to put your name out there for looking for any kind of employment...I know I sure wish I could find someone to pay 8 dollars an hr to help with household chores right now...

Wishing you the best, you will get through these tough times and come out way ahead...Will keep you in our prayers. Keep the faith and stay strong...and please make wise decisions..

2newadvntrs...Who says she is trying to conceive now. Just because she belongs to the group doesn't mean she is trying right now. I belong to the same group but I'm not trying to conceive right now. I just didn't like that you are making assumptions about people you don't know. U don't know what her whole story is and what she is going through.


beentheretwo...Sorry your going through this. Hope things get better for you.

I am sorry for what 2new has said to you....I hope your mood gets better sad is no way for mom to be when you do not know why mom is sad and the thing is you never cared if your shoes were stapled or bought new....

I think some of the later advice that 2new gave is better than the blast she started with...she needs to look at how she responds to basically everyone here....the thing about putting up a note in laudrymat might work to get some ironing to do for a little extra cash...just hand write out a note and put it up with some tape or thumbtac if they have bulletin board...even maybe see if some mom's need babysitting services by posting on CL....you like kids...I assume...hugs bill

I just asked, and was hoping she was aware, unfortunately there are many people in this life that are not aware...Trying to concieve is just what it means...It surely is not the time for concieving..I read it in here all day long...Many people in abusive relationship ooops now Im pregnant thinking it will get better,,, people in poverty, teen pregnancy just go read them here on this place...Im not saying this is her but she surely does not need to be trying to concieve...Unless Im an idiot last I checked trying to concieve is the motion to provide and care for another being...

Should I just candy coat everything like everyone would like to hear??? That is not reputable advice...
Now if this lady were to tell me You know I enjoy this test from God, I am testing his love for me and I just want to have another child to love , it doesnt matter I know I will make it no matter what then By all means Im going to go..High five sister Im going to be praying right beside you every night just because I know you too will be blessed....But I didnt quite get that from her...Of course you really cant get a whole lot from people here ...For all I know Bil who whines everyday may be a rich guy who has money to spare but spends others instead and pretends to be poor I dont know...He may even be the nicest guy youd want to give a hug to and say wow I can relate...Had to say it Bil cause you have been also not posting the nicest things to me either...like the article from yahoo...That no one can seem to respond to my responses...and appreciate my strength and failures and ways I have posted to get out of them over the yr...

2newadventure- I really feel attacked by your response to my post. For your information I have not been trying to concieve for more than two years. (not since our family finances went in the toilet) I struggled with infertility many years ago and mainly visit that site for the purposes of supporting others currently dealing with infertility. I just hoped for support and feel like I was called (among other things) stupid and irresponsible.

Ok I am sorry for that Just thought Id cover all basis didnt know...I have met some pretty dittsy people out there that have actually thought having another kid on welfare benes is better because they would get more...I have heard and seen it all...I was simply shooting it out there ...but I am glad you are wise enough...Please take my apoligies into consideration, You must have witnessed people also of the such...Had to throw it out there..

2newadventrs- Thank you, much appreciated.

I felt she was attacking you too. I know how hard it is to deal with infertility. My husband and I went through infertility for over 10 yrs. The groups on here are to support each other not attack each other. Sorry that happened. Oh and I don't think you are a stupid person so don't think that.

I am going to completely ignore all the negative talk here, so as not to give it any power, and just send you a hug and say that I am so sorry you are having such a difficult time. Doing things like stapling a kid's shoe surely can break down a parent. I like to try to remember "this too shall pass." One of my best friends on here and someone who is very dear to me said that she had a month when her 5 kids were young when all she could afford to feed them was ... potatoes. All month long. That broke my heart. And today, she has a nice life, the kids grew up and turned out just fine and they just adapted and adjusted and got through somehow (her faith played a big role for sure).

It's just temporary. Nothing stays the same. Nothing, not even the Good Things. : ) hugs.

What mechelle said... gonna ignore the negatives and get back on topic. There IS hope! Hang in there! I have been through some pretty tough times and I know it's frustrating (see my post about can't afford vet the other day!) but hey, things can get better. Start by counting the blessings you do have - believe me, there are some - if your son is healthy and has feet to need shoes that's a start. There are charities that can help with food and even clothing. Especially for kids - people do a lot of stuff for kids. You'll find a way. Hugs.

Im in another group and sometimes I could cry..people are told by the medical profession are cured the medical profession use this word but it means got to a stable positon..the thing is I want to say to people look you have a chronic illness dont you understand but people I guess do not want to see the harshness of their situation ..so its hard to give people advice when you see things ..2newadvntrs just wants to not sugar coat things shes not being unkind ..the people who are unkind are the big boys out there who do not give people a chance..the banks ec etc ..In one way Ive been through alot and so many of us are but one thing is if I can help somebody ..I wish their was more help for people ..Im now fighting my mortgage company wont port ..the asses wont let me downsize to help me financally they just seem to be making it so hard..Im getting more and more angrier how people are being caught in situations.

I agree Jokey...All these programs that are supposed to be helping people keep their mortgages have done nothing but hurt them more and send so many people into foreclosures...Again though there are some that took out second mortgages for instance like my neighbor wanted 2 mustangs both running 68,000 a peice because they were an collectors edition signed...Cashed in their 401 and took out second mortgages, to live friviously ate out every night etc...then one day they both got repoed..I myself had advised them not to do it when they had asked all I could see was trouble coming..surely they have been in and out of foreclosure themselves now...I do not feel for those people, I am sure they arer not the only ones who lived high life and are now paying for it by loosing it all...
But the ones that have actually struggled all along and lived within their means they are truelly the ones that could use the help and should get it..The ones that have lost their jobs legitamately, not the ones that that boo-whoooo all the way to gimme a free check so I can live of the govt...
I have seen and heard it all...When I orrigionally responded to this post, many people took it wrong like I was being negative...I wasnt trying to be...Just ask every criminal in Jail if they are guilty they will all say they were innocent...I had to throw what I threw out there...Not many people will ever admit to such things..It wasnt about being negative its about being honest...If I have a problem and I go to a counselor are they going to just go yeh , yeh yeh or a good one will go what steps are you taking to prevent further detriment?? They get people to look farther than the just right now, the consequinces, the rewards or where will something put you later if you do this right now??? I have learned to look at life that way...For instance I am sorry that even Bill takes my advice wrongly He wanted to buy a really nice scoooter..I even liked it, would have said alright...But I look at his other posts and hear him say he has 15 dollars to make to next week, and all the student loans that have been pushed to the side...It is just a wake up call...Im not saying Biill is a bad person, he rather adorable...But when I have said Bill dont you think you should pay this first, he takes me as the evil person attacking ,negative advisor , non supportive person in this group...In fact you know what I would be so happy when I see Bill Go I paid off my CC and my student loans and Damm I am going to get me that scooter.
So I am sorry that everyone took my ?????? for being negative and non supportive. We are a group. It seemed like that is all that anyone got out of that No one saw the positive that I wrote.
Anyways as I have said Been there Too...I spelled your name the way I did because I too have been there..It was not fun...It was not a good feeling , it made me cry..I had no family to turn to to ask for anything..It was just me and 3 kids, my abusive X hubby just beat my 3 yr old son from his neck to his feet and I had no choice but to get out...He didnt pay a dime of CS for 13 yrs, thought he could run all along...I felt upset because it was just him to support and he could go do work and it was just him to think about...While it was me that had to move to a different state, get 2 jobs and go to college..The only benes I got from the state was free daycare..and food stamps which was a small amount because I worked 2 jobs..Like 200 a mos...But at first for 6mos I didnt even get that..I was lucky I had enough to pay for a Hotel room and went in the dumpster to get left over chinese food from the restruant next door.. They use to feel sorry for me so occasionally they gave me old food they were throwing out that night...But for the first month I literally had only one ramon noodle to feed myself and 3 kids..I saved every dime I had extra and bought me a mobile home which people these days still stick there nose up at...Hell If it were me in foreclosure, I try to scrimp every dime and not pay anything but live there as long as I can and actually buy a mobile home to live in..
Anyways, Been there , My real advice was this will pass...We are here for your support..Please dont feel upset..Take this time and teach your sons to be thrifty..Funny thing is from time to time when I have been out of food , clothes...Those were when some of my kids learned the most..My son whom is 21 soon actually shops at the thrift store, as does my daughter whom is 22...It has been me that has kind of said eehhh I can go to expensive stores and get whatever lately...But Thank You actually , Some of my best Easters were getting a used basket and filling it with little trinkets that the kids would like from the thrift stores...In fact my daughter has this ceramic box that I got like 6 yrs ago from the TS one Easter..
Huggs to you...Be thrifty...try and hit every food bank you can...trade clothes for some other clothes at the thrift store..I know my 12 yr old that is how in Hi I actually made it too..The clothes that didnt fit that looked very nice I asked the commander if I could get some of what I give...It worked out nice...Just try your best..This time is a time of teaching and growing in faith...Your sons are learning more than you think right now..In a great way!
Sorry this ended up being so long...But really had to share and vent...and spread some love too..

Actually Thank You for reminding me...So I too need to open my eyes to try better ways to save some money once again...Just know in 20 yrs your children will be trying all these ways to save money themselves..Heck come to think about it my sons live on their own and One day my son said Yep saved me thirty bucks and super glued my shoes gonna wear them till they fall off...so cherish these times you dont know who else is learning some of the most important lessons in life right now...It too is a blessing...In disguise...Huggs!