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Ok so it's 6am this afternoon I have my long awaited gp appointment to try and work out what's going with me (I have no diagnosis yet) last night my partner said she wanted to come with me for support and to hear first hand what the doc has to say. I said ok. She then asked me what I was going to tell him so I started reeling off the list of symptoms I'm experiencing. She started looking at me a bit confused. Then when I said all my muscles are sore and every time I move it feels like someone poking a bruise she gave me this awful WTF! Look. She then but it's not all the time I think your going a little over the top!! Umm yes it is all the time, I struggle all day every day I just don't moan about it. Now I'm not sure I want her there today. I suddenly feel very intimidated and after gear myself up to go in and lay all my cards on the table I suddenly feel like a hyperchondriact. I didn't realise how much she underestimated how bad I'm feeling. Not sure what to do now. She's gone to work and I'm not going to get to talk to her before the appointment do I still let her come?
I think this is a question only you can answer for yourself.
My opinion is that if you can still be assertive about how you feel with her there, then go for it.
When I was diagnosed the 2nd and 3rd times (my GP was first...sent me to a rheumy who confirmed it...then went to new rheumy who re-re-confirmed it), I asked my significant other to let me do the talking. I explained that I was very anxious about the whole thing and, while I wanted her support by being there, it would help me tremendously if she could just let the Dr and I interact for the most part.
This worked well in my situation, but I have no way of knowing if it would help in yours.
I hope everything works out great!
I wonder if you were doing some of the things I was... my husband would ask what was wrong when I was hurting and I would say "Oh, I'm just tired." I didn't do this to downplay or discount what I was feeling - but part of my mind didn't really accept that I was in pain. I was still assuming that this was the way *everyone* felt. When I was diagnosed, I explained to him that "Oh, I'm just tired" was apparently my code for 'I'm in pain!" He started to get a better picture of what had been going on then.
Take care, I hope that your appointment goes smoothly.
Best, Sharilyn
That said, let her know you're a little upset she didn't realize how bad you felt, and take it from there. I wish I could say yes or no, but every relationship and partner is different.
Good luck at the doc, and hugs,
Leo
I know here, docs are very expensive and have very little time to talk to you. You have to be ready to get in there and say what you need to be treated well and get some real help in a small amount of time.
I think you should give your partner some really good info to read about fibro so she can understand.
amitrip. is a great med for me. GL!
It hurts really bad when your other ignores how you feel. The day I lost my job he just watched tv in the kitchen as always. The he wondered why i was upset- I told him I needed him to tell me it will be okay, that I will find a better job soon, etc., but to him it was another day while I was completely devastated. I know he's the type if guy that if he can't fix it then there's nothing to do.
Always be true to yourself and if your loved ones don't act the way we want them, it is their truth.
Good luck!
Jo