Wow! Where is this person....we'll get her!

Just kidding, of course, but that was a very low blow. I would have been shocked, too, and would have wanted to say something back to her to let her know why I couldn't walk that far. Maybe something like, "you're lucky to be seeing me at all with the way I feel" would have put her in her place.

If you feel up to it, you might explain to her again what the fibro is doing to you. Or you can just chalk it up to ignorance and don't let it stress you. But that's really tough, when people who are supposed to care about you don't listen enough or don't try to understand what it is we're going through.

I hate that for you, I really do. That's one of the worst things about this disease/syndrome....people just not getting it!

Take care, and remember we understand.
Elizabeth

Aww Luna, I am so sorry...I hate when people bring out the "L" word.
My family has been assuming I am lazy for years, making uneducated guess about my 4 Dx's and where I should be in my recovery. Never have they taken up on me on my offer to help them learn accurate info so they can make constructive comments.
I am now used to it, but I think it hurts more when it comes from a friend.
I wish I could change that experience. Next time just tell her it's an Ozone Alert Day and you choose not to breathe in noxious fumes :)
LuLu

I think other people understand what it means to Fibromyalgia, but they can never really get it. Until you have to live with a chronic illness like Fibro, it is hard to get the "every day for the rest of my life" feeling.

Some day even I think, "Oh no sweat, I can do ____" Then when I get up off the coach, my legs ach, my back doesn't want to straighten up. And by the time I get to the door, I'm not sure I can walk to the mailbox. If I don't get it all the time, I don't feel like I can expect anyone else to get it.

Not sure I am saying this correctly, just give your friend the benefit of the doubt. When things like this are said, maybe we should try and explain it to them like they were a child (easily and simply.)

Good Luck {{{HUGZ}}} SG

it's hard to believe that we are as disfunctional as we are. One block up and one block down is the most I walk these days. People expect everyone to be like themselves, specially if they're self-centered.

Sorry for your shock, hope you can get over it. We live in bubbles. That's a big part of the problem, right there.

I am sorry. I just think people who don't have pain font have a clue.
They have no idea and doesn't even enter their minds

I'm sorry she said that to you. It still surprises me the things people think are actually OK to say to someone.

I have days when I think "Oh I can walk that - it's not far - and I always regret it about halfway to my destination. I can do some forms of exercise without issues, but walking isn't one of them. The last time it was a 10-minute walk to a place I can literally see from my office, and I limped for the rest of the day.

Try not to think too much about what other people think - their opinions don't define you.

I do agree that people do not understand and that it is very hard to empathize with something like Fibro, and of course there are times when giving someone a 2nd chance is a good idea. I think a lot of us are at the point where there are no more chances left.

But what I want to say is, I know Fibro is hard to get, but what happened to just plain old being polite? Why couldn't Luna's friend have said " I notice you took the bus. May I ask why?"

When my brother does not believe me about something instead of immediately calling me a liar, why not "I'm having a hard time believing that; Tell me more."

My brother is deaf in one ear due to being to close to an IED during one of his Deployments. What if I said "Like hell you need that hearing aid. You just want attention" That would never be tolerated. Now I could say "Tell me about your hearing aid, does it make a big difference when it's on, can you hear anything when it is off?"

So, I just think overall, maybe as a society, we are becoming more judgmental and have lost the art of common courtesy. Us folks with Chronic Illness, Mental Health Issues, Disabilities, tend to step more gently because we are more sensitive to the needs of others...

Long Rant...not sure it made sense

I like what everyone has said here. Some days I can do so much more than others. Today my shoulders hurt as I'm typing.... I mean really, what the heck is that? (I actually feel worse now than I did when I woke up...)

Venting can help too, so go ahead anytime you need to Luna! :)

HARD TO UNDERSTAND BUT I JUST EXPLAIN AND LET IT GO , UNLESS THEY WALK IN OUR SHOES THEY DO NOT UNDERSTAND BECAUSE WE LOOK OK, DON'T LET IT GET YOU DOWN, JUST DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR SELF, WE UNDERSTAND,COMFORTING HUGS SHIRLEY

Round up the posse!

I am with you. I hear this a lot. And I hear it more since I injured both pelvis and spine two years ago (there's irony). "Oh can't you walk a fe miles?" ?!?! Till a year ago I wasn't walking at all!

We're here for you:-)

Wo w what heartless people, do they even listenm when you describe what your going through. OMG she need a slap up side the head. It is rediculaous that people who do not understand fibro just automatically think your lazy. That you choose not to work or enjoy life. I recall a year or so ago my sis in law sais , oh well you don't look sick . so how would I know your up all night . Well geez take a good look at me now. As for your friend her head must be somewhere else beccause I am sure that you look like you are suffering, to have walked and managed to meet her. I am surprised. good for you congrats for getting out . But next time I hope you meet someone who truly cares about you and your well being. Can we slip this person a little letter to inform her on how your doing. Maybe a little note would get her back on track. Take care isabee

Luna, Sorry for that! How insensitive! Perhaps you should bust out with the spoon theory on her?!

http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/wpress/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/

Just a thought...

That spoon theory is really good - thanks for sharing it. Maybe it should be pinned somewhere for every new person to easily read? Can we even do that?

Firstfall, that's a wonderful idea... Not sure if admin would or not.???

People see me gimping and ask what I did to myself and I say nothing, that is what fibro does and let it go at that. Just glad hubby sort of understands as he has seen me at my worst.