First off, welcome to the group. Fibro is different for all of us and it varies from day to day. For me it can go from achy, mild discomfort to feeling like I was dropped into a giant Plinko game, and all the pegs have electrified nails in them, and you land on a pile of rocks, and the rocks are on fire. I, personally, haven't found a medication cocktail that works for me, but getting plenty of rest, hot or cold compresses, gentle exercise and massage therapy have been helpful for me. Feel free to vent anytime. Finding this group has been immensely helpful to me. It's always nice to know there are people out there that truly understand what you're going through.

Hello James, welcome! And, yes, new people are also free to vent here. All those frustrations bubbling don't always wait until initial introductions are out of the way.

We have several men here on the board, so don't feel like you're a weird one, medically. Men most certainly get the FM diagnosis. If I may ask, where you tested for many things before you got your FM diagnosis?

Dislocations aren't particularly common with FM. Originally when they were digging around my diagnosis, some hyper-mobility in my joints and partial dislocations of my knee and hip made them think it was the genetic disorder EDS - Ehlers Danlos Syndrome. I was just a few ticks short on the check-list, since my hyper-mobility is limited to only some of my joints and a few other details.

Your rib problems would personally make me suggest you take that up with your physicians. FM is very, very known to be one of multiple diagnoses for a person to have. Potentially you have other things going on as well and some of your symptoms might be more controllable, if it turns out you have unrecognised health issues.

I have a lot of different types of pain depending on how flare-y I am (really getting battered with persistent pain higher than your usual is what we call a flare). I have constant aches in my hips and frequent shoots of sharp pain and stiffness when I move. When I'm in a bad, bad flare, my hips and knees feel like the embodiment of sharp pain. I also experience a lot of constant skin-tenderness and full body muscle-soreness that means any poke you give me will be uncomfortable.

Something that I would have liked a heads-up about when starting this whole "oh, you're chronically ill" thing is the grieving process you go through. Like you with your fencing, having to accept that you cannot make the demands of your body that you would want is upsetting in a way that's hard to put into words. Despite health problems, I was always very active (travelling more than 65 miles a week by bicycle) and it frustrates me to no end that I now struggle so much with all kinds of activity and can barely keep up the strength that I want to.

Give yourself the space to be angry and sad about it. Those feelings make loads of sense. I think it's very brave of you to love fencing enough to share your insights and passion with other people.

Sorry for the novel length post! We can all just relate a lot to what you're feeling and saying, I'm sure. This is a place where you can indeed vent and ask questions and just commiserate with people that won't raise an eyebrow at what you're saying because they live it, too.

There is also a daily check-in posted by a lovely and active member called Leo. People come chat about their day and support others in theirs. Plenty of us here also use this site for keeping up social contacts, with many unable to do a lot of activities.

Welcome again and take care!

Welcome! Vent away:-) I'm down with flu right now, but can tell you that *yes* you can have a connective tissue disorder. There are several that affect connective tissue specifically, and can have fibro-type pain or fibro as a related issue. (I don't discriminate. If it hurts , it hurts, but docs aren't that mellow.) Some are hereditary (Marfan's, which runs in my dad's family, and my rheumatologist has it, and fibro secondary to it, which is how I was diagnosed early and accurately in 1995.) Some are not. Either way, make sure you get gentle exercise and see both a rheumy and a neurologist to get everything ruled out *other* than fibro. It may not rule out fibro, but could help figure out what's a best course for you. Most of us agree on gentle exercise (I used to hike the Appalachians, so believe me, scaling back *hurt*), clean living diet, and stress management.
Coming here is a big part of stress management for many of us. Where else do people know what we mean when we say, "I've got that fibro headache"? Exactly!

Welcome, and if you haven't bought FIbro for Dummies? Do so. It's our go-to book, and in the past has helped peopel realize they needed a different doc, or gave them ideas for how to cope, etc.

Also, don't lose hope. I was dx'd in 1995. I worked back up to 5K a day and daily yoga, and was even almost-asymptomatic (in remission, we call it) for about 8 years. Didn't last, but knowing I was there once gives me hope I can do it again. However it was I did it. Because nobody knows, docs included. Eh. *shrug*

Unload, vent, grieve, rage, ask, whate ver you need:-)

Sorry about that, I hate these small boxes, I didn't know what I'd typed. *headdesk*

James:
I am so excited you found DailyStrength (DS). You are going to love it here. Everyone is telling you to yes vent and I would like to tell you too! I have FB but we found the cocktail that worked for me. I also have an extreme form of MCTD. I started with FB at 14 y/o with arthritis but they didn't diagnosis me with until a lot later. You are blessed you have a name with illness. I haven't heard of dislocating ribs with MCTD. Please don't misunderstand me saying you don't have MCTD. It's just I have never heard of it or come across it in all research and communication with my healthcare professionals. I cannot imagine having that! Wow, you are very brave and strong! Like everyone is telling you: vent, ask questions, lightly workout, and find the best of the best Rhuematoligist and I would highly recommend a neurologist. You are at the beginning of your quest and the road gets rocky and at times you will find road blocks. Many of us start out with FB and then they add another diagnosis, than another, etc... I pray this is not the case for you but if it happens let us know. We are here for you! You have met Leo. Leo is one of the strongest members here. Leo will make you laugh, give you insight, and much more. Don't be afraid to jump in and ask questions and vent! We are here for you! You may find some people just don't want to hear about it. That is okay. You now have us.

I just want to welcome you, James. Sorry you have this nasty disease. I am 54, and was diagnosed with fibro in 2007, although I had pain of all sorts after having a very bad case of mono at age 14.

My ribs are usually the worst of my pain. I don't feel like they go out of place though.

I hope you have a good doctor. Good job on the coaching. So glad you can do that.

Welcome James. I am also a guy... Frustrating to be diagnosed with what the media would have you believe is a woman's disease or condition... I began symptoms in my early 30s but wasn't officially diagnosed until mid 50s. It's not been easy, but there are a lot of well informed and empathetic people on this site you won't likely find anywhere else. I'd encourage you to come back often.

Another thing that can be useful for multiple reasons: CBT - Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. It can be a very useful tool when dealing with chronic pain and all the emotions that arise around getting/accepting/living with a diagnosis like this. Perhaps something worth looking into as well.

I've seen quite a few people here say they have experience with it (myself included, twice even), so don't hesitate to ask if you have questions. We'll do our best to help out.

Adding in that you can consider therapy as stress management... I learn great relaxation techniques that help my FM... from my therapist for PTSD! Therpy Thirsdays are when I tend to share the tip of the week, btw. So there can be a lot of value in therapy tooled for chronic pain sufferers, to help with anxiety, sleep issues, stress from family, boundaries, learning to say "no", etc.

BTW, we have several men here, so pelase, if so,ething arises that you feel is "male" in nature, just tag the thread subject line with Men Only if that helps. We ladies do that, for certain issues.

Cheers,
Leo

As a teenage girl I know how you feel with it taking long to be diagnosed , it can be really hard to get doctors to listen to you , and especially because you're male and the disease is most prominent in females. A lot of people seem to think that fibro is something only middle aged females get , but they're oh so very wrong , feel free to vent any time!

Welcome to the group! Ask questions, vent and join us on daily check in which is hosted by our lovely spokesmodel Leo. She treats us to fascinating trivia, keen insight on life and funny stories about the wildlife in her neighborhood.

Hi James,
I've had trouble with my ribs for years. I happened to find a chiropractor who used an actuator to adjust the ribs where they join the sternum, and I had full relief within 24 hours... compared to no improvement over weeks of anti-inflammatories. When I've moved, I've had to ask around and try out a couple of chiropractors before I found someone who know what I was talking about, but it has been worth it to find someone who can help when that happens. It seems to happen most often when trigger points in my scalenes act up, so I try to keep those under control and it seems to reduce the frequency of rib issues. I don't know if any of this sounds like it would help, but I hope so!

And yes, sometimes it feels like my nerves freak out for no reason, mostly in my legs. I find that it's better while I move around, but that doesn't help when I have to be at my desk or when trying to sleep. I'm trying recordings of binaural beats (theta waves) when going to sleep, and it seems like it helps calm things down. I have to be pretty intentional about staying still and trying to relax, but it gets easier with practice.