Worry about things that May happen:

Please do not torture yourself with worry about what May happen.

If it happens then you will deal with it.
Worrying about things will not keep them from happening, so it is a futile pursuit.

Enjoy each minute that you can because you do not know how long they will last.

Please remember to live all of the joy that you have and do not let yourself worry about what may happen

I am going to say a special prayer for you tonight...for God to help ease your mind and worry. I know how easy it is to let this stuff get so overwhelming at times. I have been there, too! I have also been in denial and it did take me a lot to finally accept what has been given to me and deal with it. It really helped me in the long run to just except and not worry! Take good care and keep the faith....XO!

Thanks for the prayers. I'll add mine for you. In fact, I do pray for my DS friends daily.

You're right "D"... I know it, just letting it get the best of me for the moment, and I know I'm not the only one.

Its about finding your balance and keeping it (I'm still working on it) when your "balance beam" changes so must your balance. Try to always keep that in mind and hopefully you will worry less about your own health, its normal n ok to worry about the rest of us a lil (takes the focus off yourself) and a lil fear is natural but I know lots of folks have it worse than me So I'm thankful every day for the ailments I don't have (it hurts to pick up my 2yr old today but I don't have cancer or have to go to Chemo so life is pretty good) Have a good week sweetie

Narey,
Whenever I get worried about where I am physically, and how it might go in the future, I just tell myself the Iranians might hit us with a nuke and my worries will be over. (I actually do that, but it's meant to be funny, also)

Sounds like physically you're doing pretty good lately, the old Devil loves to whisper "what if" in our ears and ruin our peace. Hang in there, keep praying for us, and I'll pray for you, too. Judy

mynameisD,you said it all,and I'm so glad I read this I needed to hear those things to. I have nothing else to add.You said it all I need to write that down.
Thank You

Narey, just listen to D she is very wise!

Gentle Hugs and my Prayers are with you and all of my DS friends always :)

WOW everyone who replied had so many good things to say,what a great group of people here,just reading all your replys makes me feel better and I know I have found the right support group.you all are so caring and gentle,I just can't get over it.I hope that sometime I can be an encouragement to all of you.Narey Thank you for your prayers,like I said in my first reply I also pray for all my DS friends to,thats what gets us through everything we face. Hugs to all of you!!!

I think anyone with a chronic illness, who has experienced the worst of it, will live with some degree of fear that it will reappear. I think it's normal to be fearful that you may again become incredibly ill. I believe the fear is heightened if you had to fight doctors to take you seriously and if you felt like your body was failing and defying you. You may be a very rational person but, seeing healthy people who don't have our concerns may lead you to wonder 'what did I do wrong?'

Being fearful is not courting disaster nor is it being ungrateful for the good days. It's human nature to learn from our experiences.

This is some of what scares me:
*That there's no cure for Fibro;
*That I'm 7 years into this illness and I still have new symptoms;
*That earning 2 degrees and working at the same company for almost 10 years means nothing in this economy and that having this illness will make it THAT much harder to get a job;
*That I don't know who'll take care of me as I get older.

So, I won't tell you not to worry. I think it's probably better to acknowledge the fear, allow yourself a set amount of time to worry or think about the possibilities, and then put it aside.

Take the fear and turn it into something positive. No matter our age, each of us has probably spent more time (than most healthy people) being aware of the good that we've seen and felt. For example, even though my financial situation is terrifying and I was in a lot of pain today, I was able to walk outside at noon and look at the changing leaves.

There were a few minutes during which I was distracted by the blue sky, the rustling colorful leaves, my Lab sniffing the crisp clean air, and the chipmunk family running a bit too close to my Yorkie. I'm guessing Chippy and family know my dogs won't touch them - or they're daredevil chipmunks. : )

I think most people my age wouldn't have noticed what I took the time to see this afternoon. Being sick is not something I'd ever choose but, it has afforded me the gratitude for the days I can leave the house (even if it's just the backyard).

Having time slow down (as it seems to do when I'm in pain) gives me the luxury of staring up at the night sky and the multitude of stars. I know that some of the pinpoints of light I saw tonight came from stars that died long ago. That makes me think about how the universe was here long before me and will remain long after me. It actually provides with some comfort when I look up and see that there's SO much more to life than the immediate.

My illness has definitely robbed me of some things that I thought were guaranteed. But, I've had the time to notice that there's significantly more out there beyond me.

Sorry this got all philosophical. I just hope you know your fear is normal, that you're not going to jinx yourself and bring more pain just by thinking about it, and that you too probably notice more about life than most healthy people.

I don't know how many times I've heard the saying "If your going to worry why pray, if your going to pray don't worry, turn it all over to God or your higher power"

I still worry sometimes but then I pray and turn it over to God.

Another thing to think about when you start to worry maybe they will have a cure before whatever your worring about happens.

I use alot of distractions so when I start to worry I think of other things. There are alot more pleasant things to think about.

Sending Hugs & Prayers

Very well said D I can not add to that...

take care everyone
gentle hugs

I understand the fear. I keep going to doctors even though it really ticks me off that they do not do anything and say that same things over and over. I just keep hoping that they are going to change their mind.....It is not Fibro...it is blah blah blah and we can fix it! In my mind I know this is not going to happen, but I am afraid to admit that there is nothing the medical field can do. There are so many unknowns that it is easy to be scared. Take it one day at a time and relish in the fact that you are OK TODAY.

Hi. I know exactly what you are saying. I sometimes have days were I am in pain but alot of the time its ok. I mostly wake up with the body pain and stiffness but it usually goes away in about and hour and there are times when I get migraines that last for days. But usually I can shop and do all the daily things as long as I don't over do it. At times I think that maybe I don't have FM and CFS (I always know I have IBS). Then I will go through a rough patch (either emotionally or physically) that sends me into a tailspin. I worry alot but that is my personality even though I try not to. Sometimes I just have a good cry and then try to steer my thoughts elsewhere. Its raining again this morning in Jersey so my aches and pains are a little worse( at least its not too cold). Try to keep yourself distracted with other things - I know easier said than done. Hope you have a great day!!!

ALL of your responses have really been great and so appreciated. I agree with you all.

2puppies, I am glad you got all philosophical, brought a tear to my eye and let me feel accepted and less alone. Thanks.

mmglad, I'm in NJ too and today am so weak, fatigued and have all little shots of pain here, there, and everywhere. I am also blaming the weather. I am very lucky that this is not a school day for me and after getting the kids to school I was able to come back home to just be. Planning to lay low this morning... afternoon brings it's own set of BUSY.

mmglad, narey - I'm also in NJ. The weather here for the last 2 years has wreaked havoc with my nerve damage and Fibro pain (and my migraines too). We haven't really had a spring in two years - it went from very cold, snowy winter to hot, humid spring/summer. This winter was awful for me (we were snowed in for two of the snowstorms). I think the weather (with the stress of trying to find a job) is the reason that my Fibro has gotten so much worse - it feels as bad as it did before I was properly medicated in 2003.

I used to LOVE NJ autumn - def my favorite time of the year. Now the mold kills me (with my allergic rhinitis and migraines) and the cold hurts my back.

I try hard to still enjoy the sights and crisp air but, it does make me a little sad....I can't go on walks because the mold level is so high near me.

I'm happy, though, that I have my memories of really great Septembers, Octobers and Novembers: back-to-school excitement, the leaves changing colors, decorating for holidays, the smell in the house when it's a bit chilly and my mom starts baking with cinnamon and pumpkin spice, etc.

Before I got sick, I used to mow the lawn and do all the yardwork and gardening. I still love seeing the grass this time of year - green but, no longer growing.

And, because the fall holds so many great memories, I sometimes treat myself to a Pumpkin Spice Latte or a Cinnamon Dolce Latte from Starbucks. It's the smell of those spices that calms my nerves and reduces my stress level.

I hope everyone in the Fibro support group has memories that can make them smile - even through their pain. A lot of my memories are scent-based (as you can see from above), while others are music-based. I'm incredibly grateful that some of my best memories can be triggered by something as small as a flavored coffee (with spice sprinkled on top) or listening to certain music on iTunes.

To Narey and mmglad in particular (since you also live in NJ) - hopefully you've been able to enjoy the lack of humidity, the return of new shows on tv (a welcome distraction - esp because watching tv doesn't require a big attention span), and the mums and pumpkins that have already appeared in the grocery stores and farm stands.

I would suggest to anyone that baking can be a rewarding experience. I can't do it from scratch anymore but, it's still enjoyable. Clean-up doesn't have to take long and most people loved freshly baked cookies, pies and cakes.

Baking is a great excuse to have a few people over or to visit with someone you love. I've yet to meet someone who doesn't get excited when they're greeted with the offer of something I've made, fresh from the oven. My middle brother STILL comments every single Thanksgiving about when I was in grad school ('97 - '99) and baked almost every weekend.

Time to feed my dogs and give them their Benadryl. Of course my dogs also have allergies. ; ) They're sitting near me biding their time before they can go to the mailbox, have chicken breast, and take their Benadryl incased in 'meatballs.' They remind me constantly that little things can make anyone happy.

I hope each person who reads through this discussion created by Narey feels less alone by realizing that we all experience pain, sickness, some obnoxious doctors, and fear. But, God-willing, we also have positive memories that we can hold onto and can trigger. Best of all, as long as we're still here, there's still time to make new memories. Maybe the process won't be as grand as it was in the past. But, really, when you think about it - aren't your best memories based on small moments and gestures?

Narey, I know what you mean about busy afternoons. I also took it easy today after taking the kids to school. I hate rainy, damp weather. I think we spoke in the Northeast US group - we're both just over the bridge from Philly so I guess were on the same wave length. 2puppies, You brought back alot of memories I've forgotton and reminding me to rejoice in the simple things that bring such comfort. You are an excellent writer - I really enjoyed your posts.
Everybody: Have a great evening and hopefully a sunshine filled day in store for tomorrow!