Fibromyalgia Support Group
You're not alone in your pain. Fibromyalgia is a condition that can be difficult to diagnose and manage. If you're trying to cope with pain throughout your body, sleep problems, general fatigue, or other common fibromyalgia symptoms, you're in the right place. The community is here for you to talk about therapies and share your challenges.
Hi Everyone! To give a little background, I have been friends with Karen and Kevin for around 18 years. We used to work together. We have been trying to get together for lunch now for a few weeks, but I haven't been feeling well enough to go. When I wrote the note that day to them saying I may be able to go, Kevin said he and Karen were going to a certain new restaurant and they would LOVE it if I could make it. That right there threw me off because it was supposed to be all three of us deciding where to go, not the two of them deciding to go and hoped I could "make it." (Plus, the lunch originally was going to be Kevin and I going and all of a sudden on Facebook she said she would be seeing us the following Monday for lunch. I said, oh really? I didn't know you were going. She said she figured it would kill two birds with one stone (have one lunch with both of them instead of separate). I don't know about you guys, but this irritates me! Not only did she invite herself to come along, she took away my being able to enjoy lunch with each of them separately, which is easier for me to do.
The following is my last note to them about not being able to make it last Thursday.
Sorry I didn't make it last week. I've been sick all this week too and can already tell I won't be able to go to lunch tomorrow.
:-( This last med change has been a killer!
Karen's response:
Yes, we totally understand. Kevin and I missed you but we had a nice lunch anyway. Man, what the heck are they giving you? I am so sorry that you have been sicker than I remember you ever being. Have you tried that new medicine that they advertise on TV for fibromyalgia? Are they still feeding you steroids? Have you ever checked into a more natural way to manage your illness? I sometimes wonder if the meds they give people just keeps them sick so they keep going to the doctor. If you ever listen to the side effects of some of the drugs they advertise on TV I would not take the chance of having severe diarrhea, stomach cramps, fatigue, nausea, etc. that they mention! Well, I do hope that whatever they are giving you eventually works b/c after all this time of you being sick with this nothing has given you any relief or even given you some sort of remission. Just know my thoughts are always with you and I sure hope this ends for you and you start feeling better. Hugs!
What do you think? She always has suggestions for me without knowing the facts. She expects the docs to have cured me by now without realizing I have a lot of different things going on and I'm darn lucky to be getting out of bed every day, let alone trying to go to lunch!
Ok, back to what you think ... lol!!
Thanks!!!
Hugs,
Sheri
The following is my last note to them about not being able to make it last Thursday.
Sorry I didn't make it last week. I've been sick all this week too and can already tell I won't be able to go to lunch tomorrow.
:-( This last med change has been a killer!
Karen's response:
Yes, we totally understand. Kevin and I missed you but we had a nice lunch anyway. Man, what the heck are they giving you? I am so sorry that you have been sicker than I remember you ever being. Have you tried that new medicine that they advertise on TV for fibromyalgia? Are they still feeding you steroids? Have you ever checked into a more natural way to manage your illness? I sometimes wonder if the meds they give people just keeps them sick so they keep going to the doctor. If you ever listen to the side effects of some of the drugs they advertise on TV I would not take the chance of having severe diarrhea, stomach cramps, fatigue, nausea, etc. that they mention! Well, I do hope that whatever they are giving you eventually works b/c after all this time of you being sick with this nothing has given you any relief or even given you some sort of remission. Just know my thoughts are always with you and I sure hope this ends for you and you start feeling better. Hugs!
What do you think? She always has suggestions for me without knowing the facts. She expects the docs to have cured me by now without realizing I have a lot of different things going on and I'm darn lucky to be getting out of bed every day, let alone trying to go to lunch!
Ok, back to what you think ... lol!!
Thanks!!!
Hugs,
Sheri
I just think it is typical of people to say this..it is just another ill informed person thinking they are helping you????....they truly think they are..and i have found that when you explain that things don't work the way they think they should?..it falls on deaf ears too?...they just don't dont truly want to know ?..they just want you to "get better"?, then it will stop annoying them?..
I dnno?...it is just typical this sort of dialogue.....i don't really have any words of wisdom here..I have been battling this for 14yrs...and I have heard this so many times from ill informed ignorant "friends"?...
huggs..
As for the commercial I think the same things when you hear about all the side effects and your still willing to take the meds what is wrong with us. This type of thinking did land me in the hospital because I kept seeing the "sudden death from asthma" in the advair commercial I cut back on it now I'm back on it taking it the way I'm suppose to along with other meds.
These commercial do make fibro look like nothing more than a headache and if you take their pill you'll be fine and back to normal.
I wish I knew what to tell you. I did a post asking for prayers for one of my friends and this is part of the reason. For me this person is a real friend, not a fair weather friend that disappears when the weather changes.
Sending Prayers that you find more friends that are there for you and not just when the weather is good.
Hugs
maybe you need to have another 'chat' to her and let her know that it's not as simple as it all may seem, that there are no quick cures and pills. maybe throw her one of those emotional youtube videos.. something with emotion and music, lol, really! us humans seem to respond to that sort of thing more... something visual and something stimulating.
xo
As for lunch...are you sure that you are not being a little sensitive? After all, Kevin may have invited Karen to come; and if the three of you worked together previously, I wouldn't see anything wrong with that. If you want to spend one on one time to speak privately, then you should let Kevin know that you're glad Karen can make it this time, but you'd also really like to go alone with him sometime soon to discuss personal matters.
Just a different opinion :) Good luck & Hugs!
In this day of medical inventions and medications, it's hard to understand why there's no magic treatment for fibro....Docs can fix lots of things today pretty easily.....
People can't always understand if they don't have fibro.....heck, some days I don't understand it all....my close family doesn't always understand.....At least she's talking about the fibro, and letting you know she's thinking of you.....
Just my thoughts......Hope you feel better soon, and HUGS from down south :)
It's hard not to feel left out :(
Hugs.
LOL.
My friends were probably there for me but when I first got sick I probably pushed some of them away I don't always think to clearly when I'm sick.
One of the nice things about this board is getting different views from others it can really make you stop and think and see things are not always as bad as you think they are.
Hugs
People are people. No one understands F unless they've had it. Hell, I've had it for over 20 years and I still don't understand it. I know I wouldn't fully understand your pain because we're all so different.
Cut your friends some slack and let them be who they are. They'll be more likely to accept you as you are that way.
Truly, it sounds like the girl who wrote the note is concerned, even if she's naive. She did put out the effort to write a note.
I wish I had friends who invited me to lunch - even at an old place.
igonorant of your health issuies these two..not worth the bothering with...and i say to them both sorry u dont take my illness for real...personally smack them one lol
hugs lozzy
Can anyone send the Letter to people without chronic pain to polarbear?
Yeah, when my daughter got hit with a spinal cord disease 2 1/2 yrs ago, EVERYONE had a name for what she had and how to "fix" it and they were all different AND all wrong.
When I got sick, most of my friends went silent and all of a sudden new people started emailing me and calling me. people I knew but had never formally met. They have all stood by me while the others just went away.
I sent an email to everyone I knew and it was all info on Fibro and what it is. My brother was the worst (or the silence was worse - I can't decide) but my brother said it was all in my head. As soon as I said I also have Myofascial Pain and Degerative Joint Disease, he became concerned.
My husband just came home from work and took off to go do photography at one of his favorite spots. He needed to go on a beautiful day. Did he ask my daughter or me to go? No. We are stuck in the house because neither one of us can drive anymore. It's hard to have people around you doing what you want to be able to do. It's normal for them to be out, but it also hurts that we can't be normal too.
Hugs - Ter - Holybluejeans