I am a mother to a 9 year old boy who has sensory processing disorder. He was diagnosed at about 2 years old. I thought all along that this was the cause of his coping difficulties and learning problems. He has an IEP for auditory processing problems, expressive speech and learning difficulities. He has ADD but does not have any hyperactive traits and is actually every well behaved. He had friends up until recently. It seems like once he hit third grade, the other kids have kind of shunned him. I believe it is his speaking skills and higher level thinking that he is so delayed with. He doesn't contribute to conversations or activities well and they just don't want to be around him. He also gets emotional and gets his feelings hurt easy. I was told that children with this often get better as they get older and even begin to catch up with their peers. Well, the gap between my son and his peers seems to be getting wider and I am so concerned. I drank alcohol on the weekends until my pregnancy was confirmed at 4 weeks after conception. I had no idea I was pregnant and usually had several drinks on a Friday evening (like 6 drinks within a 5 hour period). At week 3 after conception, a friend from out of town was visiting and I drank about 9 drinks while I was out with her (over about a 5 or 6 hour period). I stopped drinking when I found out I was pregnant but by then, I had had around 4 "binge" style drinking during these 4 weekends. My son was born full term, weight and head size and didn't have any of the facial characteristics so I thought everything was fine. I didn't know about FAE until I have looked into it more because of his learning problems. He is well aware that he is not doing work at grade level and cries asking me "why can't I be smart like the other kids in my class?" "I want a new brain Mommy, why isn't mine working" He is so hard on himself and tries really hard. My heart breaks everyday for him. We got his IQ tested and it is 85 which is very low but in the normal range. His processing speed is in the 10 percentile. I talked to a psychologist who specializes in Sensory processing and he said that although there is a chance this was a result from my drinking, it usually takes more than what I drank to cause the kind of problems my son has. He said the kids he deals with that have problems similar to my son have been adopted from eastern europe and had mothers who drank heavily their entire pregnancy and also went through tramatic experiences during the adoption process. My younger son, which I did not drink while pregnant, has some sensory issues too, but not as bad. He has some hyperness as well as attention problems but does not have learning problems as my older son. Learning problems, add and emotional problems do run in both mine and my husbands families. I know my energy needs to focus on helping my son but I am paralyzed with guilt and remorse that I may have caused this. Every difficulty my son faces leaves me with a voice in my head saying "you likely did this to him" Does anyone have any opinion on whether this sounds like FAE or is it just problems typically seen with children who have sensory problems. Do you know if it takes more than what I drank to cause FAE?
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