That's messed up. You remember somethings that didn't happen and don't remember other things that did. People have gone to jail over crap like that.

Im sorry, I need to clarify, my memories of abuse with this sisters boyfriend were real. When I said he never touched me, that is true he had me touch him. I remembered that. I have inhibitions about touching penises, and that makes sense. I am also uncomfortable being touched in certain ways, because I did not recall the abuse my dad inflicted on me, I didnt make the connection. I assumed these symptoms were all related to the abuse from my sisters boyfriend, but that was not the case.
I blocked the memories of my dad abusing me until I was 31 (recently); because he molested other people I can confirm my fears. Things I feel relate to what was done to me; my sisters and others have similar stories.
This is of course new to me, but as I talk with other survivors I learn that it is very common to repress memories. The mind is a very complicated. Apparently, it's a self-defense mechanism. You can't just sit across the table from the man who abused you and eat your Cheerios; the mind blocks it... denial. Then, years later, when you feel safe enough to handle it, or when something triggers a memory; it comes back. But, before the memories return, a person may be experiencing symptoms of sexual abuse without realizing it. Yes, there may be cases of false accusations, but apparently it is more likely that sexual abuse did occur if you experience these symptoms, and it's something to consider.

I've wondered the same things, asilvercloud. I think we are more sensitive to it because we've experienced the abuse, and we know the effects it can have on people sexually. That's not to say that everyone who has sexual difficulty has been abused. Sometimes it happens for no apparent reason.

i am new to this site and i am glad i did...i am 4 weeks out of lapo to remove cysts off of each of my ovaries. and i am still having all the cramping and disabling pain i did before the surgery as i did before minus the ovarie ain which was the easiest of it all. i have been seeing diffrent dr's and therapists and psycho dr's since january 1 when i went into the hospital the first time and have been down for the most part ever sence. i do not remember my childhood before 7th grade at all except for the horrible flashes that haunt me, i was diagnosed with ptsd 2 years ago because of the abuse as a child and rape in college and lots of stuff that makes a list a mile long and i have been trying to get the dr's to consider the possibility that my pain is physical manifestations of this ptsd stuff. most of my pain surrounds my menstral cycle except for all the back muscle spasms i get from stress. my cycle is 2 weeks of build up cramps that me and my husband have always just called pms and then i have the week of heavy bleeding and #10 labor pain cramps. i have always had very bad cramps ever since i started and all of the pain has progressed to where it is now at age 36, i feel almost completely disabled most of the time for the pain, and my surgeon is the first dr' who figured out there is something to what i have been trying to tell them all, i have my first therapy session this week to finally address this issue. i have tried alot of their pills for the ptsd and they all make me feel really crazy and even the pain meds i have a hard time with. i do not like to be "intoxicated" at all, and i have yet to find a med that does not make me feel this way, i really need to get to the root of all of this and figure out how to heal the "wounds"...i do not want a bandaid, i want healing.....it is so nice to finally find some other women who are experiencing the samr thing i am...wow...i dont feel so alone right now, for the first time in a long time...nice to mee all of you!!!

Wow Kat250! Maybe show some sensitivity. This women is sharing some of her most difficult struggles in life in a group that should be safe and welcoming and open for discussion and you're calling her messed up. And forgive me if I'm misreading your tone since it is hard to distinguish emphasis when reading words on a screen, written by someone I don't know, ... but it even sounds like you're scolding her. That is what's messed up here as far as I'm concerned.

silver, I can relate to your experience. When I was in my early 20's I started having flashbacks of my father molesting me. And I too, know of others he molested in our family. There were lots of things I blocked out as a small child and when they finally came back I wound up in the BHU at the hospital because I was having such a difficult time dealing with those truths. I had a complete mental, and emotional breakdown. The bright side was, and is, that after that whole experience of remembering, even though I was incredibly shaken, I actually felt whole. I always knew there was something missing. (I was also physically and mentally abused by my schizophrenic mother.) I wrote about it for years, this illusive "thing" inside me that made me feel so awful and sick inside. And after the fact (flashbacks) I could even remember those feelings washing over me "randomly" when I was around my dad. It was a complete whole body/mind/emotional sick feeling that would just pour through every place in my being. I can still remember the feeling, it was so intense. I agree whole heartedly, the body always knows, and gives signs. (Sorry this is so long) I am also happy to add that I never got that feeling again ever since the breakdown. I finally felt like I was cleansed of those (most, there's always a scar.) feelings.

I understand. There are a lot of issues I have now that I still feel like are linked to vague memories I have at a very young age of 3. Parts are missing from the memories, the parts i suspect are the bad parts. I guess ill never really know for sure.