Female Sexual Issues Support Group

Sexual dysfunction or sexual malfunction is difficulty during any stage of the sexual act (which includes desire, arousal, orgasm, and resolution) that prevents the individual or couple from enjoying sexual activity. Sexual dysfunction disorders are generally classified into four categories: sexual desire disorders, sexual arousal disorders, orgasm disorders, and sexual...

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ChicagoDave 09/17/2007

Hello all and thanks for reading this. I am 54, straight and in great health. I have a much younger (39 year old) girlfriend with a high sex drive. We just met 5 1/2 weeks ago and its been amazing in every way.

We're both in the same industry, she's very driven and wants to work closely with me, and she's beautiful, sexy and a terrific person.

This is SO embarrassing, and I'm worried to bring this up to her. Is it MY problem, HERS, or OURS? Here it is - she has a very pronounced vaginal odor. I don't know whether its from meds, or that she takes a lot of protein supplements because she works out a lot, or something else. But it is quite strong and is not pleasant.

Its starting to affect my sexual response to her. I care for her and don't want to insult or hurt her, but most of the women I've been with in the past had almost no odor of that kind at all (I lived in Japan and Thailand for a long time, and think it may be due to a diet very low in meat, but whatever.) It was very enjoyable for me to go down on a lady and I can't bring myself to do that with my present gf at all - I know I'd totally lose my erection and interest.

Does anyone have any advice? I don't want to lose her, but my sexual interest is already starting to diminish and its because of this. I'd really appreciate any help on bringing this up, or perhaps a perspective on something I can do to change my own response. Am I just being too sensitive?

thanks very much.

Wilson 09/17/2007

You need to tell her in a nice way. This can really turn a man off and it is best to let her know before she turn's you completely off.

Marah 09/17/2007

You need to tell her as a strong vaginal odor could be a sign of an infection or other health condition. Does she have itching also, or other symptoms like an unusual discharge? Whatever is causing it, she should see her gynocologist for help. Don't just ditch her, tell her.

ChicagoDave 09/17/2007

Marah - thanks for your reply, but the last thing I'd do is "just ditch her". That's not what I indicated at all in my post. I'm more afraid of LOSING her.

But to the point, no, she doesn't have an unusual discharge to my knowledge, nor does she have any other symptoms. I guess I would ask the question that, if this is an unusual condition for a woman, wouldn't that woman herself know that something was different from the odor? No, I think this may be a natural condition for her.

How to tell her...

deleted_user 09/17/2007

Start giving her fruit baskets with lots of pineapple.

Marah 09/18/2007

She may know, but be embarrassed and hope that no one else notices. But I would still say, it is time for a visit to a gyn.

deleted_user 09/18/2007

Maybe you too could take a pleasant bath together with some lavendar bubble bath to get things started and see if that helps with any odor. She may just need a good soak once a week in healthy essential oils to get her ph balanced. Also, when you talk to her pump her up with all of the things that you like about her to boost her confidence when the negative is talked about. I wish you the best. Ellybelly

deleted_user 09/18/2007

this made me smile, because i recently had a male friend of mine mention i smelled kinda funky the other day. it wasn't a vaginal thing, just reapplication of some deodorant required, but it made me think of it all the same. the thing is at first i was embarrased and mad because who the hell tell you that right?? but then i realized, as soon as i got over myself, that it was rather sweet and considerate of him to mention it. that's what friends, boyfriends, confidants are there for. no one is perfect. we all have issues. i'm just glad he said something rather than avoided me or pretended it wasn't there. now i'm going to be more aware of myself. i think you should definitly tell her. just sit down and talk about it. once it's out there, it's out there and you'll both be better for it. a relationship cannot work if it's not in trust and love. obviously if you didnt care for her, you wouldn't bother saying anything. that means a lot. sit down and talk. the hardest part is getting started. it's worth it. i'm not telling you good luck. because you don't need it. the truth is the best policy, hands down. you have nothing to lose and a great sex life to gain.

ChicagoDave 09/18/2007

Thanks for all your comments so far. The Ph balance thing makes sense, as does the other advice. i'll be picking up some pineapple juice (!) and who knows what else. Tomorrow evening will be the occasion for this discussion with her. The time is actually right, I guess, since she was complaining to me that I "rejected" her physically on Monday morning. (To tell the truth, she's worn me out.) I'll let you know how it goes...and thanks again.

deleted_user 09/19/2007

She may not notice the odor or know it is something wrong or she may be worried and ignoring it hoping it would go away.

deleted_user 09/21/2007

If it's a yeast infection, then a daily pot of natural yogurt should clear it up (Greek yogurt is my personal favourite, I can it it by the bucketload whether I've got an infection or not!)

deleted_user 09/22/2007

We all could go on guessing.But you will never trully know until you approach her ( in the most gentlest way ) and find out what is casuing this..

ChicagoDave 09/24/2007

Thanks to all who responded to my post. We have gotten back together (intimately) and are committed to working through things. This is definitely not a yeast infection or similar issue, but may be part of her diet and supplement regimen. We'll see but, for now, we're doing ok. Thanks and my apologies for my poor attempts at humor on other threads but I thought a little levity was in order at times.

To the fine people in this community, stay cool and fly low. Good luck to all.
chicagodave

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