Family Issues Support Group

Family issues is a huge range that go from minor conflict to major misbehaviour and even abuse on the part of individual members of the family occur. Whether you feel you are in a dysfunctional family or you're dealing with a very specific issue, this is the place to talk about it and find others who might be going through the same thing.

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SOLUTION PLEASE?

FIC
FIC
I just awoke this AM to realize that someone I thought I knew (30+ yrs) I really don't. I mean, sure on a surface level, fav color, fav food, but to know their heart & soul, nope, nada, nothing. I was thinking that if, God forbid, this person were to die, I truly don't know them.....

I want to know their heart, thoughts, dreams, desires, etc. but this person is NOT a talker, never has been and that may be why I only know the surface stuff. Or could it be that this is really all there is to this person?

Not sure, just concerned and wondering. Don't like not having that heart to heart stuff with my friends/family.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I think its more that some people have a hard time talking about things I know I do and sometimes it could be due to things the person has been through in there life maybe you should ask this person if when they were a child if anyone really cared to hear them and listen to what they had to say,then also maybe when this person did try talking and expressing themselves people didn't want to hear it and learned early on knowone really cares about what I have to say and when I do try then I get hurt by these people(that was what happened with me I'd get beat and pushed around that often leads to someone withdrawing into themselves and maybe just having talks with themselves)unfortunately and even though it can turn around what some children learn as a child carries over into adulthood,I am not all that talkative sometimes I am but often am quiet and reserved even though now I am told its ok you can talk and express yourself your parents can't hurt you anymore it still feels unsafe to do so,I hope maybe you can get this person to open up to you and talk about all the things you mentioned you want to know,move slowly maybe a little at a time.Take Care,Kim
FIC
FIC
Kim, thanks for your words. I tend to stay in my "own head" a lot but that is due to being a thinker/problem solver type. Also, doing the jobs I've done in the past (management, counseling, etc.) you learn very quick to keep 2 ears open and 1 mouth shut. Listening, really listening to someone so they know they are HEARD and understood is very hard to find in our society. I try to do that.

Thanks again for your time and listen, all words, except the four letter kind and those of bigotry are needed to be listened to. I don't tolerate name calling and four letter words too well. There are too many in the English language to express oneself properly. At least that's my "opinion".

Thanks again.