Family Issues Support Group
Family issues is a huge range that go from minor conflict to major misbehaviour and even abuse on the part of individual members of the family occur. Whether you feel you are in a dysfunctional family or you're dealing with a very specific issue, this is the place to talk about it and find others who might be going through the same thing.
So here's a bit of the back story....
My oldest sister is in prison for possesion and intent to sell crack cocaine. She was 60 days sober when her sentence came through, and after her 2 years she will be going into a rehab facility for another year. Her choice. Unfortunatley, before she could come to reality with her addiction, she lost all three of her children. Her 15 year old lives with her dad(3 kids, 3 dads), as does the 11 year old. The 13 year old lived with me and my fiancee for awhile but now lives with her grandmother, my mother. The 13 year old has serious issues. She is violent, she does not bow to authority, she drinks and smokes pot all the time. She is rude, ignorant, and snide. That is why we had to give her up, I was only 22 and after a year the stress was taking a physical toll on me.
Now, here's what I feel guilty about at the moment(I feel alot of guilt when it comes to my family). My mother was fired from her job of 18 years about 10 months ago. My brother and sister in law allowed my mother and my neice to live with them for cheap, but after awhile they could not handle my neice(I'll call her KC) any longer. They were having issues with their home and were looking to move, and they found a place that would not hold my mother or KC. So my mum got a job about a month ago now and she found a place for her and KC to move too.
So she was hoping to get her income tax back to afford the damage deposit, and it hasn't been returned yet. So she asked me if we had 850 she could borrow. We do, but I told her no. It would cause such a huge fight with my fiancee as it would be our savings I would be dipping into. And part of me didn't want to do anything more to help KC, even if it meant stranding my mom. My bro and sis in law told my mother if she sent KC to a place where she could get help then my mum could stay with them. But my mum won't do it. And I'm scared she is going to ask if they can stay with us until they get the money for a new place.
I can't have KC in my house. I have an infant daughter, and all the hate she drags around with her is too much for me. She brought a toy gun to school to 'scare a bully' and got busted. You know what the courts gave her? 10 hours community service, to be finished in 2 months. This was not her first time in courts. She just got off probation. I don't want to have my mother live on the streets, and I don't think KC should either, but at this point that's where she stays out of choice. I did what I could to help her and she 'disowned me'.
I dunno....I'm worrying myself sick over all of this. The closer it gets to the end of the month the more nauseous I feel. My mother is finally looking into getting KC sent somewhere, like a juvenile hall so that she can see what she is doing to her life, but I doubt she is going to follow through on this. I love my mother, and I love KC too, I just can't handle her right now.
My oldest sister is in prison for possesion and intent to sell crack cocaine. She was 60 days sober when her sentence came through, and after her 2 years she will be going into a rehab facility for another year. Her choice. Unfortunatley, before she could come to reality with her addiction, she lost all three of her children. Her 15 year old lives with her dad(3 kids, 3 dads), as does the 11 year old. The 13 year old lived with me and my fiancee for awhile but now lives with her grandmother, my mother. The 13 year old has serious issues. She is violent, she does not bow to authority, she drinks and smokes pot all the time. She is rude, ignorant, and snide. That is why we had to give her up, I was only 22 and after a year the stress was taking a physical toll on me.
Now, here's what I feel guilty about at the moment(I feel alot of guilt when it comes to my family). My mother was fired from her job of 18 years about 10 months ago. My brother and sister in law allowed my mother and my neice to live with them for cheap, but after awhile they could not handle my neice(I'll call her KC) any longer. They were having issues with their home and were looking to move, and they found a place that would not hold my mother or KC. So my mum got a job about a month ago now and she found a place for her and KC to move too.
So she was hoping to get her income tax back to afford the damage deposit, and it hasn't been returned yet. So she asked me if we had 850 she could borrow. We do, but I told her no. It would cause such a huge fight with my fiancee as it would be our savings I would be dipping into. And part of me didn't want to do anything more to help KC, even if it meant stranding my mom. My bro and sis in law told my mother if she sent KC to a place where she could get help then my mum could stay with them. But my mum won't do it. And I'm scared she is going to ask if they can stay with us until they get the money for a new place.
I can't have KC in my house. I have an infant daughter, and all the hate she drags around with her is too much for me. She brought a toy gun to school to 'scare a bully' and got busted. You know what the courts gave her? 10 hours community service, to be finished in 2 months. This was not her first time in courts. She just got off probation. I don't want to have my mother live on the streets, and I don't think KC should either, but at this point that's where she stays out of choice. I did what I could to help her and she 'disowned me'.
I dunno....I'm worrying myself sick over all of this. The closer it gets to the end of the month the more nauseous I feel. My mother is finally looking into getting KC sent somewhere, like a juvenile hall so that she can see what she is doing to her life, but I doubt she is going to follow through on this. I love my mother, and I love KC too, I just can't handle her right now.
I think you've done about as much as anyone could or would expect concerning KC.
This is of your mom's chosing, she knows Kc has ISSUES that only someplace and people with the preparation can HELP her . your mom would only be ENABLING her, to continue with her destructive behavior. good luck and Please don't feel guilty, you have your baby to protect..