Family Issues Support Group
Family issues is a huge range that go from minor conflict to major misbehaviour and even abuse on the part of individual members of the family occur. Whether you feel you are in a dysfunctional family or you're dealing with a very specific issue, this is the place to talk about it and find others who might be going through the same thing.
Last month I ceased contact with my family and have decided to move on and live my life because I find that there is nothing that can be reconciled. I come from a bad home and a dysfunctional family.
Here is my issue. When I was in contact with my family, I brought my daughter over there a few times and during those few times I witnessed something awful. My stepfather got physical with my daughter, who was acting up at the time - he lifted her up by the collar and told her to knock it off and then threw my daughter down on the floor. Another time my daughter touched the Christmas tree at my folks place and my mother started yelling at my daughter and berating her. Another time my stepfather started cursing and swearing around me child. I think I have just cause on why I don't want my child around my family!
Oh there are more things with them and my child.....Once they looked after my child and complained horribly how they can't handle her and that she is too much to look after and they really hate children.... (yet the other grandchildren are there almost every week end - going to movies and camping.) When my child was younger they strongly flat out refused to babysit or anything.
My Ex is extremely insistent and highly obliging to my mother about access to my child. He tells me that I'm being vindictive and using my personal issues with my family to use my child as a pawn. He also states that it is my mother's right to her grandchild. I can separate my family issues and concern for my child.
Hell no! If they are abusive towards her, my child shouldn't be subject to that. Sadly enough, I can not afford a lawyer to take this to court and fight this matter. Technically I have day to day care and control of my child and he only gets visitation.
I'm not sure what to do and this is really bothersome. I'd rather have my child safe than being abused and hurt. I have spoken with Child Welfare about this many times and they are not doing anything to help me they just keep saying it's my responsibility as a parent to take her away from that situation and protect her. How am I able to when my ex behaves that way. I'm too broke to get a lawyer..
ID
Here is my issue. When I was in contact with my family, I brought my daughter over there a few times and during those few times I witnessed something awful. My stepfather got physical with my daughter, who was acting up at the time - he lifted her up by the collar and told her to knock it off and then threw my daughter down on the floor. Another time my daughter touched the Christmas tree at my folks place and my mother started yelling at my daughter and berating her. Another time my stepfather started cursing and swearing around me child. I think I have just cause on why I don't want my child around my family!
Oh there are more things with them and my child.....Once they looked after my child and complained horribly how they can't handle her and that she is too much to look after and they really hate children.... (yet the other grandchildren are there almost every week end - going to movies and camping.) When my child was younger they strongly flat out refused to babysit or anything.
My Ex is extremely insistent and highly obliging to my mother about access to my child. He tells me that I'm being vindictive and using my personal issues with my family to use my child as a pawn. He also states that it is my mother's right to her grandchild. I can separate my family issues and concern for my child.
Hell no! If they are abusive towards her, my child shouldn't be subject to that. Sadly enough, I can not afford a lawyer to take this to court and fight this matter. Technically I have day to day care and control of my child and he only gets visitation.
I'm not sure what to do and this is really bothersome. I'd rather have my child safe than being abused and hurt. I have spoken with Child Welfare about this many times and they are not doing anything to help me they just keep saying it's my responsibility as a parent to take her away from that situation and protect her. How am I able to when my ex behaves that way. I'm too broke to get a lawyer..
ID
Personally even IF this was the case,I would fight tooth and nail to ensure the courts saw how abusive and manipulative the grandparents were and do everything to keep my child from being alone with them.
If this isn't the case,take it from me,this has gone beyond just letting a grandparent see a grandchild. If you allow them to inflict the abuse,you would be EQUALLY as guilty as them. You have to do what you need to,and tell your ex to go where the sun don't shine! It JUST goes to show how much he really cares about this little girl's welfare...hmmm
Hugs,
So I try to protect him as much as possible, which is what you have to do for your daughter. You have custody, so it is your say. Put down some boundaries with everyone. It is more than just physical. It is her emotional welfare you have to be worried about as well.
go here for help in Canada www.pssg.gov.bc.ca/victim_services/publications/guides/PeaceBondsRestOrdersWEB.pdf -
It looks like child services will push for my EX to have my daughter to live with him permanently - even though he is under investigation.