Family Issues Support Group
Family issues is a huge range that go from minor conflict to major misbehaviour and even abuse on the part of individual members of the family occur. Whether you feel you are in a dysfunctional family or you're dealing with a very specific issue, this is the place to talk about it and find others who might be going through the same thing.
Going to try to make this as short as possible. My real mother (whom i lived with until i was about 10) married a man AFTER she found out that he molested me for quite some time.
Im over that issue...but this man has just found out that he has 2 sons and 5 granddaughters.
His son went to visit them and took the granddaughters last year. I wanted to tell them about him, but always was told that its better to not talk about such things.
Until recently. I was told to "LET IT BE KNOWN". Thing is i havent seen my real mother in several years...but i do go home to see my daddy and my Mama (the one that has known me since i was born and named after and has raised me since i was 10).
Well real moms child molesting husband went out and bought a brand new car just so they could go visit HIS kids nad grandkids which is only 200 miles from me, but he wont let her drive to come see us. We would hvae to go see them. Which I refuse to do. I do love my real mom, but shes chosen this man over her own kids more times than i care to mention.
Now, Im afraid that if I tell his son and daughter in law about what he did to me that 1. they will think im doing it out of spite for not coming to visit us. 2. he will hurt my real mom (hes been known to hit on her) because of my telling and 3.) how do i respond to the son and daughter in law when they ask why i didnt tell them before the made the trip to go meet them last year?
Im in a pickle. I know I MUST tell them because if i dont and something happens to those girls I will be as guilty as if I'd hurt those kids myself..but at the same time..my real mom is 62 and her husband is a freaking mean man. I dont want her hurt either. Theres nothing I can do to prevent him hurting her, but i can prevent him from hurting innocent children. although, my real mom says hes changed. I feel once a molester always a molester.
Suggestions? Comments? All welcome.
Im over that issue...but this man has just found out that he has 2 sons and 5 granddaughters.
His son went to visit them and took the granddaughters last year. I wanted to tell them about him, but always was told that its better to not talk about such things.
Until recently. I was told to "LET IT BE KNOWN". Thing is i havent seen my real mother in several years...but i do go home to see my daddy and my Mama (the one that has known me since i was born and named after and has raised me since i was 10).
Well real moms child molesting husband went out and bought a brand new car just so they could go visit HIS kids nad grandkids which is only 200 miles from me, but he wont let her drive to come see us. We would hvae to go see them. Which I refuse to do. I do love my real mom, but shes chosen this man over her own kids more times than i care to mention.
Now, Im afraid that if I tell his son and daughter in law about what he did to me that 1. they will think im doing it out of spite for not coming to visit us. 2. he will hurt my real mom (hes been known to hit on her) because of my telling and 3.) how do i respond to the son and daughter in law when they ask why i didnt tell them before the made the trip to go meet them last year?
Im in a pickle. I know I MUST tell them because if i dont and something happens to those girls I will be as guilty as if I'd hurt those kids myself..but at the same time..my real mom is 62 and her husband is a freaking mean man. I dont want her hurt either. Theres nothing I can do to prevent him hurting her, but i can prevent him from hurting innocent children. although, my real mom says hes changed. I feel once a molester always a molester.
Suggestions? Comments? All welcome.
I'm 40 and my mom's 66 and I'm still waiting for her to make good choices. I may as well wait for a pig to fly.
We can wish and try for others to be things they are not, but it's futile.
Energy is better spent at making peace with the status quo.