Family & Friends of Cancer Patients Support Group
This community is dedicated to parents, siblings, grandparents, other relatives, friends and caretakers of cancer patients. It's difficult to find a safe place to talk about caring for a loved one with cancer, and so this group serves as an open forum to foster positivity and support for those going through this tough time.
My big sister and I have never had a good relationship. We have a relationship, but it's strenuous at best.
I found out today that she has bone marrow cancer. They have given her six months to live.
I feel....separated. Part of me is crushed. Part of me is sad. Part of me is indifferent (shock maybe). And part of me actually wants to laugh. I don't know how to act, how to feel.
I feel jumbled, and confused, and it's hard to breathe but at the same time I keep hearing my mind tell me it's not real.
My spouse doesn't like my sister even more. He thinks I should of cut her out of my life a long time ago. I'm actually scared to tell him the news I got because if he brushes it off I may lose it.
Plus, it's my daughters fourth birthday today. I figure I'll keep it to myself until tomorrow?
I have a thousand thoughts running through my mind but none of them form completely.....and I just don't know where to go from here.
I found out today that she has bone marrow cancer. They have given her six months to live.
I feel....separated. Part of me is crushed. Part of me is sad. Part of me is indifferent (shock maybe). And part of me actually wants to laugh. I don't know how to act, how to feel.
I feel jumbled, and confused, and it's hard to breathe but at the same time I keep hearing my mind tell me it's not real.
My spouse doesn't like my sister even more. He thinks I should of cut her out of my life a long time ago. I'm actually scared to tell him the news I got because if he brushes it off I may lose it.
Plus, it's my daughters fourth birthday today. I figure I'll keep it to myself until tomorrow?
I have a thousand thoughts running through my mind but none of them form completely.....and I just don't know where to go from here.
Your first responsibility is to yourself. If you feel the need to talk things through, seek out counselling. There are helplines, or if you need something more you could arrange one-to-one sessions through your doctor, or find a group session of family and friends of cancer sufferers, you could look at cancer charities for this info.
It is totally up to you what you do. Nobody would blame you if you decided not to have anything to do with your sister. I don't know your history or what she has done, but I am sure you have reasons for separating yourself from her and her getting cancer does not change those reasons, or whatever she has done.
It could be that you feel the need to reach out. You could do this in or you you could write a card or letter. But personally I think that you need to get your feelings straight in your own head first.
Personally I would tell your spouse about it, or at least tell someone close to you, it sounds like keeping it all inside is hurting you. But tell him you need his support not judgement, that you are aware of his opinion on your sister and not interested in hearing it again, you just need someone to listen and sympathize.