Way beyond my scope of practice to have an opinion on you going on or off meds, you do deserve to be happy, we all do, my personal experience is my partner is better off on meds and so is the family here, again that is our situation and not yours and i am not in any way trying to tell you what to do, whatever it is you decide I wish you the best of luck..............................................hugs

Just had this discussion with my significant other. I basically have 2 moods happy manic and mean as fucking hell manic. I have a few depression days thrown in for shits and giggles with very few even keel days. As long as I stay on my meds the happy manic days remain and tho I am crazier than a loon everything is good. I skipped three doses of meds last week and the nasty side of me crept up and gf nicely reminded me that perhaps was time to start remembering to take them. She was right in the end and tday proves it as the looney me is back and crazy peace reigns supreme.

On the flip side of the coin both my BP children and GF (who is also BP) at this moment are unmedicated. I would love for this to not be true especially where my oldest is concerned as she has some dozy manic episodes but all three of them are adults and I can't make that call for them.
I don't advocate anyone going off their meds. We all know what comes of that and whether its 3 days or 6 months in the end we crash and we crash hard usually. Best of luck BPP which ever you decide to do.

BPP, I think it is common to "wish" we could do without our meds. I also think you know in your heart that you have a disorder that is not going to go away. You need medication to help you cut the frequency and duration of episodes. Your choice will not just affect you but also your daughters and husband. Will it be a fair trade off to once again have your libido back and be able to loose a little weight in exchange for possible psychosis, mania, depression, hospitalization. YOu know yourself that if you go off meds and you become episodic that the meds will not immediately kick in. It may take months to get you stabalized again and the same meds most likely will not work.

The alternative is marriage councelling, learn to communicate with your husband, learn to please one another without libido. I went through years with "no libido" but with open communication, affection and attention toward my husband, we were able to survive it. Another option with your weight gain is to seek the direction of a good nutritionist. My guess is that the health clinic at your college has one. We cant have it all, we have to choose.

I will never go off meds again and I will never recommend that either of my sons do. I would rather teach them healthy alternatives to nurturing relationships and living with good self esteem.

BPP, I understand your dilemma. As I've said on this board the meds are a sort of Faustian pact, we gain stability sometimes at the loss of our cognitive abilities, motor co-ordination, libido, sexual function or ability to control our weight. Some psychiatrists seem to feel this acceptable "collateral damage", I don't.

My suggestions would be to see if you can get your psychiatrist to see this, or to find one that does.

I have to say, from this and other posts in BP..that I think your husband is being unfair. I'm of an age and experience to accept that women, bipolar or not, do experience changes in shape and libido over the years. Usually they are more aware of it than their husbands and it really is a curse for some. They don't need someone drawing attention to it. The least you can do as a man is have the balls to deal with it in a supportive manner. Having gone through this experience myself in past relationships I really don't have much sympathy for men whining about this stuff, it is not, to coin a very old concept "the behaviour of a gentleman".