Interesting! Your theory sounds right on. Obviously, the PO wants to retain a position of authority and the handshake is used to level the playing field between ywo people...something the PO can't allow to happen.

That's a very good question! When I was up North my many POs treated me like I was dirty... refused to shake my hand or even let me use the pen they had to sign papers. One of them even told me she was a "Germaphobe." While waiting for my appointment *which was scheduled for a specific day/hr, they would come up to the counter and yell out my last name loudly ..."Double doors!!!!" which was the secure area where the offices were. They then would take their time getting to the double doors to let me in. No respect given nor received.

When I transferred down south I've always shook my POs hand every time I see him. They always call me "Mr." or by my first name and I have anytime on the assigned day in which to report. Respect received/Respect given....

For sure. My son is a "yes sir, yes ma'am" type individual. If anything, he wants to please too much.

I'm glad back down south, they treated you differently. Since he is on federal supervised release, my theory is that it is a departmental policy since his 4 officers have never given a handshake and this reinforces my son's thoughts that the world hates him. He can't understand that they are trying to establish authority even though with him, that is so not necessary.

It is an unwritten rule. At least it was with law enforcement. I totally forgot about this. I am glad you brought it up.

I have to think here....for LE it was dangerous in the fact that by being in such close contact could cause you harm. I know it sounds stupid....but it is a fact. If you keep your distance you have a chance to retreat if neccesary.

I also think it was a sign of equality. We were trained to have the "upper hand" so to speak.

As i reflect upon my career and dealings with criminals, i was hesistant towards the beginning. As i got more experience i chose differently.

I gained the notoriety as the "good deputy". How? I respected the inmates in jail and treated them as humans. In turn...they also had alot of respect for me. I did not hesitate to shake their hand.

So in answer to your question or observation......i can probably say if its a rookie PO, they may feel uncomfortable. A seasoned PO may be differant.

Just my thoughts....

When i was with my PO i shook his hand from time to time I believe the hand shake is what sets the tone and if they don't shake your hand all respect is out the door

I would agree with West for LE but not for corrections. You are inside a secured area with other COs with guns. You've already been convicted and want nothing but to regain your position in society. (at least I want to..)

My current PO is built like a line backer and doesn't carry a gun....

When we generalize, we get in trouble. Let's be specific - the world does not hate your son. There are PO's who treat him unfairly. For some reason, it seems to me that humiliation is central in law enforcement. But perhaps I'm generalizing. Let me be specific, it can be with the individual. Just because they act one way, does not mean that you must act another. Just be yourself. A favorite saying of mine - Just let it go!

Thanks. He thinks the world hates him, I personally don't. When he gets treated like that by a PO, it only reinforces his perception.

Some people consider shaking hands to be unsanitary. Try giving the PO a hug instead.

Thanks Joel. I'll tell him to do that. I'm sure he'll take me up on that advice. :o)

I actually don't think your reply, Joel, was all that funny. I know you were attempting to show how trivial my post was but things like that have a devastating effect on my son, as trivial as it might seem to you.

My ex's PO was hit or miss with shaking hands. I shook her hand when I first met her and one other occasion when my ex was in a lot of trouble and it was used as intimidation.

She shook my ex's hand when they hashed out some issues he was having or some issue she had with him.

His new PO doesn't shake anyone's hands.