I am soo sorry. I had a tearful time yesterday. My grandchildren are gone and I will be lucky if I see them when they are adults. Holidays ARE the worst. I am with you!

me too....i miss mine all the time. it grieves me to hear of another young man..........keep him strong, and confident.

This holiday season was heartbreaking for me too. My 19 year old son finally had his sentencing on Friday. He was convicted as a juvenile as the offenses happened when he was 14 - 16 years old. The judge had the option of sending him to a residential treatment facility where he would receive intense therapy 7 days per week or to prison where, with budget cuts, he will be lucky to get 3 hours per week. Well, he is going to prison until he is 21. I am scared to death for him and miss him every minute. Crying can come on at any time. We are all here with you!

It absolutely makes no sense that if the VICTIM is one day under 18, they are considered a child, a minor, with no ability to make decisions or judgements, but if the person under 18 commits a crime, they are suddenly treated as an adult. Which one is it? We need to look at this honestly, really. Playing both sides of the coin is not just.

where i live you can be a sex offender and be put on the registry at the age of 12.

Anarchy, that is nutty! Ugh!

I know it's probably some kind of taboo here to ask, but what were their crimes?

http://www.chicagotribune.com/media/acrobat/2011-11/261455600-18135628.pdf

i've had this link for awhile not. he was 6 years old when he got in trouble for playing doctor.

it's ok to ask questions, because that's how you get informed.
you do realize you went from almost hatred to now asking questions. that's great :)

here's some more good reading if your interested
Borduin, C. M., & Schaeffer, C. M. (2001). Multisystemic treatment of juvenile
sexual offenders: A progress report. Journal of Psychology and Human Sexuality
Letourneau, E. J., & Borduin, C. M. (in press). The effective treatment of juveniles
who sexually offend: An ethical imperative. Ethics and Behavior
Ronis, S. T., & Borduin, C. M. (2007). Individual, family, peer, and academic
characteristics of male juvenile sexual offenders. Journal of Abnormal Child
Psychology,

Approximately one-third of sexual offenses against children are committed by teenagers. Sexual offenses against young children, under 12 years of age, are typically committed by boys between the ages of 12 to 15 years old.
Snyder, H. N., & Sickmund, M. (1999). Juvenile Offenders and Victims: 1999 National Report. Washington, DC: Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention.Davis, G. E., & Leitenberg, H. (1987). Adolescent sexual offenders. Psychological Bulletin

or here
http://www.ncsby.org/What%20Research%20Shows%20About%20Adolescent%20Sex%20Offenders%20060404.pdf

yes you read that right. 1/3 of sexual offenses against children are commited by teenagers. haven't found stats on 19-21 year old or how many sexual offenses are with in a couple years of each other, but i'm still looking this up.

than again i'm just a simpleton :)

oneofthem, the crime does matter.

As I explained thoroughly in the other thread, I don't believe in blind justice. A 17 year old having sex with a 16 year old is not the same thing as a man raping his teenage daughter.

Lumping all of them together for a single sex registry is wrong. But so is equating the 2 actions mentioned above.

Yes, the registry is wrong in some cases. But I wouldn't want to live next to a violent sex offender. I don't care much for this forgive and forget BS. They chose to commit a violent act against another human being. Just cut off their nuts and hang them to be done with it.

So, please, stop trying to say committing a violent act of rape is the same as an 18 year old having sex with his 17 year old girl friend. You are muddying up the water. Makes me wonder what your motive is.

My abuser was a teenaged babysitter. I've realized long ago that he was most likely being abused himself by an older brother. I put 2 and together from things his mom said to my mom, and knowing what I knew that they didn't
I spent a good long time really mad at him (my teens and early 20's) until all those conversations started making some sense,then I realized.
I then forgave him.

In many of these cases, if we just look beneath the surface, we will find the child was himself abused in some way OR they are acting out of natural childhood curiosity.

In pains me when i go to other boards for victims of sexual abuse and people there call children (sometimes their OWN!) monsters, animals etc and toss them to the side...
These are kids and they deserve to be loved and supported and have the help they need

most people can agree that they detested sex offenders until they learned more about them. how many people here hated sex offenders until they learned or was changed by someone they knew? hatred starts with 1 thing. education, and then it grows. give her time to learn.

oops i meant healing hatred starts with 1 thing education.

I freely admit I have violent tendencies. My honey knows this, and he forbids me from laying a hand on him. Haven't done a single thing to hurt him.

See, I have this thing called self-control. May be alien to rapists out there, but it's quite easy to have, actually.

Look, I'm not saying most or any significantly large number of violent sex offenders will repeat their sex crimes. But they committed the crime, nonetheless. I don't care if a convicted violent sex offender is now Mother Theresa. Cut off their nuts and hang them out to dry.

If it makes you feel better, I feel the same way with some allies to the gay rights movement. I know certain individuals who were absolutely against gay rights, and wanted us all to go to hell. Then one day they found out a son or daughter or friend was gay, and their attitude changed. I want nothing to do with these individuals. In their eyes, I wasn't a human being. That will never change. If it took having a family member to be part of the lgbt community for their attitude to change, what about other groups who are also oppressed? Do I need to bring a Muslim individual in front of them to prove that Muslims are people as well? What about American Indians? We should not have had to prove that we're people to be treated as such. They should have known better.

Like I said, I don't care if a violent sex offender is now Mother Theresa. Just stay away from me. They had their chance not to commit a violent act against another person, and they blew it.

That said, I support not requiring non-violent sex offenders to register.

When I took law, my professor one day gave us a long lecture on the 2 faces of the law: The letter of the law and the spirit of the law. This was back when Clinton was caught lying to the congressional committee.

The letter of the law is what's written. The spirit of the law is the intentions behind the law. Lawyers and prosecutors often times love to ignore the spirit of the law. So did Clinton. According to the letter of the law, Clinton did not lie. After all, the committee failed to include fellatio as "sexual relation". But it was clear from the perspective of the spirit of the law that even though fellatio was not listed it was also a form of "sexual relation".

The law behind the registry is to allow those of us who are abhorred by violent sex offenders to know who's who among America's sex offenders. But since most people are idiots and can't tell the difference between a violent sex offender and an 18 year old dude having sex with his 17 year old girl friend or a 6 year old boy playing doctor with his 5 year old friend, politicians have instituted a one-size-fits-all policy regarding the registry.

So, what I support is taking the idiots out of the group who makes the law. And change the registry system to only warn us about the violent sex offenders.

Speaking of the one-size-fits-all idiot mindset, removing the registry completely is another form of one-size-fits-all idiocy.