Families of SOs Community Group
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About two months ago my brothers house was raided, and he admitted he had a deep and troubling addiction to teen porn. From this point, he had also admitted that he has suicidal tendencies and had fantasized about ending his life and made 2 attempts to do so. He was admitted to a rehab facility for both suicide and sexual addiction recovery. Since rehab he has returned home to my devastated parents, jobless and without hope, trying to stay in recovery. As a family, we are living in the shadow of waiting for the FBI to come to the house, and with the sadness that my incredible brother does not want to live. He is a wonderful human being who is selfless beyond belief and has been struggling for the past 20 years in solitude.
Now with the fear of what sentence he will get, and living with deep depression, it is hard to believe he will make it out alive. I can't take the silence of his crime and the pressure of seeing my family suffer from it all. I couldn't find support until now.
What kinds of support did you seek out when you found out about the situation of your loved ones? Is there any hope for therapy within prison? Are there any charities or non profits that help to stop child pornography, through addiction or rehab for those with this illness? Also curious if any of you have sought to supporting victims of cp through charity, add i feel this would bring healing to perpetrators as well. I am completely unaware of how to support someone with the afición that my brother has. All i want to do is love and protect him as i couldn't do before all of this came crashing in. Please help me help him.
I have a million other questions, but i thank you if you read my ramblings this far. i am lost and find myself crying and staying up nights reading prison stories, hoping there is something to hope for. I'm so relieved this forum exists, if there are other people or resources to seek out I would be so grateful to you.
Take care all -insomniac sister
The best piece of advice I can give you...is get yourself into therapy. (Lol, I actually had a therapist FIRE me as a client because I hadn't divorced my husband...) No, there really isn't any therapy options in prison I'm sorry to tell you. Out here many people will judge you by his behavior and that is flat-out wrong, but it is what they will do. I lost so many "friends" (so I guess they weren't really friends, were they?) And I was even ostracized out of a neighborhood because I didn't immediately divorce him. Let's face it folks, SO (sexual offender) is the new Scarlet Letter of the 21st Century. I am sorry to paint such a bleack picture for you.
Again, I am so sorry you are in this place...{{{Hugs}}}
Most prisons do not have therapy programs for sexual offenders, or much of anything these days. There are a minimal few that either have mandatory or optional therapy programs, but many don't help much.
There is not much help for those with sex based offenses in terms of support. My ex carries a child pornography conviction and it isn't fun. You truly find out who your real friends and family are. I lost a vast majority of my family and most of my friends don't know about his status simply because I know what their reaction will be.
As for working with victims, some of the sex offender treatment providers work with victims and bring them in to speak about their experiences to offenders as a means to help them realize what issues they have caused in their lives. However, I do not know of anything outside of that, that brings perpetrators and victims together as a base for healing.
I will tell you that I am a victim of child pornography and I was also raped as a teenager. We do heal and not every person that has gone through this thinks those that commit these acts are monsters.
I wish you the best and am sending many hugs. Its a very difficult road.
REW
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