Ahhhhh... "Valigator" shuffled in and is busy having conniptions and running people down, twisting things, and using colorful metaphors, and basic name calling..,same old same old.

Seems to have taken the comment about having a conference like this in every state in the nation, as a threat and is busy hissing, spitting,and making empty threats and getting her BP up
Quite entertaining to "watch"
But then, I've always been one to poke at things that crawl out from under rocks

I am assuming the Valigator is Loretta Baca , Looked at her facebook page and All I have to say is that no wonder she is so mad. She is so ugly and unwanted....

http://www.facebook.com/loretta.baca.31

Actually Valerie Parkhurst

https://www.facebook.com/Valigator1

@red It does seem like Loretta Baca holds a close second to Valigator.
Thank you all for checking out the article and commenting. There was a new article published Tuesday night following a town hall meeting that the cops held. It said that only a "handful of people showed up."

I somehow imagined it being standing room only with free torches and pitchforks to go around. It's my hope that since so few people showed up that maybe, just maybe more and more people are seeing the light. Maybe the lynch mobs will continue to shrink as more and more education and true facts prevail over myths and lies. This shows that we need to continue our march even louder!

Again, thank you for all who went over there and commented if you were able....I know they were using good ole FB.

Red,
Her name is Valerie Parkhurst and she is as big a bitch as there is, google her and you can find all kind of crap on her, including her drinking in a bar.(I think she is so bitter because even an "unrepentant SO wouldn't touch her.
She has been convicted(misd.) of pulling a gun on a SO(If it had been any other non SO ex con, it would have been a felony, but it is FloriDUH) she had been stalking.(Damn I wish she'd do the same to me).

I am working on a post now ... these issues are complex and I believe have everything to do with Attachment patterns established in our early years, which has to do with how we learn to internalize our primary caregivers ability to calm us when we are in a period of fear or hyperarousal. Small children who have been abused by a family member experienced what is called a disorganized attachment - NO ONE was there to protect them. These are usually the ones with the loudest voices in opposition to those of us who want fair treatment of ALL SOs under the law.

Wish me luck in my ability to explain this hard-wired, yet changeable dynamic that drives "victims" to like Valigator to do what she does --- my curiosity says victims who are "activists" need more healing of their trauma, yet I would have to do a research bases study to substantiate my hypothesis.

You guys are a mess.. Everybodies head spinning like Linda Blairs in the exorcist. What you think these post cant be read? Your every definition of what I say you are.. a disorganized collection of a group who would rather spend your days researching a facebook page of someone who disagrees with you than talking your buddies down from the daily crimes they commit..
Your post are rather humorous..

Valerie,
I find it interesting that you only responded on this site after my post on trying to ACTUALLY HELP BOTH VICTIMS AND PERPETRATORS ALIKE.

No one here said that we do not hold those who have committed any sort of sexual misconduct accountable for their mistakes. We do and we have. Yet, all sexual offenses are not the same. And that is the way those who propose harsh punishment seem to see all sexual offenders. We on this site want fair treatment for ALL, not just victims. Those of us introduced to this area of American culture need to heal too and we need a safe place to voice our concerns and our feelings, because many of us have seen injustice by the system and bullying by the system - even more harsh than any of the abuse that was even "alleged"

When families are disrupted our entire COMMUNITIES SUFFER. Those who have been victimized and not seen and heard and have not been given "safety" from their own families are usually the ones that suffer the most and holler the loudest. I WANT TO HELP YOU, NOT SILENCE YOU. And good therapeutic services that involved embodied practices while working with thoughts and memories and body sensations of trauma for victims HELP THEM HEAL. That is one of the biggest arguments I have seen by you and your supporters.

I am asking you to work with us, in unity to help our communities, not to be critical and work against us. That is all. I am asking you to JOIN US, in places where we want the same things. The trauma we have experienced is the SAME.

We all want the same thing - FAIR TREATMENT AND PROTECTION UNDER THE LAW - AND HEALING for our loved ones and our families.

okay folks - why did I get an email from Daily Strength that Valerie Parkhurst joined our group today? Did any of you get that email? I have alerted RWsMom, one of our administrators.

ah- I see I missed Ms. Parkhurst's post, so I am not really alerting anyone.

@ Ms. Parkhurst -- What do you think you are doing by coming onto this board. I trust there is a way to have you blocked. The fact that you would come into "our home" where bereaved people come together to try to find some light at the end of the tunnel testifies to your utter lack of human feeling, your debased perception of human frailty, and distinct failure of integrity.

Sorry, Valerie, but of course we disorganized. We're hurting and trying to heal. This isn't an organization where things need to be organized. This is a place to let loose and find support. You are obviously not a family member of an SO, so frankly, you don't belong here. Leave your bitterness on other forums. This is not the RSOL or any of the other places. This is filled with grieving family members, as well as, those who have gone through it. HAVE A HEART!!!!

@ Claire, no I was completely floored to see our new arrival

Well her coming her is a good sign that our group is becoming popular.. If she tries to bully and disrupt the forum she will be baned. She can always come back under another name , but once she starts the same activities and tactics she will be banned again and offending post deleted. If she can behave herself who knows she might even contribute to the conversation in some way. If you feel bullied by someone let us admins know!!!!!! Thats what we are here for. In short Valerie if you want to join in the discussion in a civilized manner pull up a chair and feel free , if all you want to do is be disruptive and spout hate and fear there is the door. Choice is up to you.

I want to remind everyone that is you have to use the tactics of hate , fear and intolerance to win your discussions , you wind up becoming like your adversary .

I just posted a similar response to another post ... to clarify to the group ... I made a post about disorganized attachment being at the root of those who are our advisaries, it is my theory after studying attachment and trauma cycles, particularly in sexual abuse trauma when no one was there to protect a small child or to help the child calm themselves because the trauma was unseen or unacknowledged.

For what ever reason, I think my comment triggered Valerie, since within less than 30 minutes she was on our site, saying we were the "disorganized" ones. And, in some ways we are, but our purpose here, as some of you have said and I agree is to HEAL.

The good news for any child or adult who has experienced trauma is that a disorganized attachment pattern is the easiest of all attachment patterns to heal from since it is a clear sign of unresolved trauma in the caregiver AND trauma can be RESOLVED. The memory of the trauma may remain throughout the lifespan, put how we deal with the trauma can be HEALED. We learn to respond differently to the trauma itself, the trauma looses its charge and we are no longer triggered.

I agree with red55 I welcome Valerie here, she too has been wounded, and only when we find support in our woundedness can any of us heal. In my letter my intent was to let her know we are all in this together, victim and perpetrator are two sides of the same cloth, and if we only look at one side we miss the BEAUTY of the tapestry. Pain is meant to be transformed and learned from, not a lifetime yoke or burden.

Here is a full copy of the letter I sent to Valerie Parkhurst:
_____________________________________

To: Valerie Parkhurst
Sent : 9/7/12, 4:11 pm
Subject: Welcome to Daily Strength - Families of Sex Offenders

Hello Valerie.

Welcome to Daily Strength and Families of Sex Offenders and thank you for your post.

I have a few questions for you ... I find it interesting that it was my post that stimulated your joining Daily Strength and that you found yourself responding from such a strong place of fear/judgment on this site ... and I welcome you and your posts here. Yet, I have to ask do you know what drives your fear and your judgment against sex offenders and the registration laws??? ... Do you not want those who have experienced early childhood sexual trauma to heal ????

My post was in response to helping even those who have had sexual abuse early in their lives HEAL ... what did I trigger in you that made YOU respond so harshly for those who tragically enough have been victimized by their own family members my any sort of sexual abuse?

I was not judgmental towards you or other sexual abuse survivors. I want ALL AMERICANS TO FEEL SAFE AND TO HEAL INCLUDING YOU, or anyone who has experienced trauma.

I hope you can PAUSE ... long enough to actually LET THAT IN ...

...MY HEART ACTUALLY CARES ABOUT YOU AND OTHER SEXUAL ABUSE VICTIMS, their families ... YOU AND YOUR FAMILY ...

... I care particularly for those who were so young with families who couldn't see what was happening to them for whatever reason, families that could not protect them, and for those who struggle all their lives to find healing for themselves.

I worked with kids 0-6 y/o who had been abused physically and/or sexually and I know with the right HELP and with healthy parental involvement kids and families can HEAL. Even you as an adult, if traumatized by sexual abuse as a child, CAN HEAL. It is not easy, nor is quick, although sometimes it can be, and IT CAN HAPPEN, with care and with TRUST and with RESPECT.

I do not judge you, nor do I judge those who have committed a sexual offense.

Actions and body language speak volumes Valerie ... and I know I triggered you by my post, otherwise you would not have responded as harshly and as quickly as you did. I welcome your response. And I am sorry you were triggered.

I will say it again Valerie - I CARE ABOUT YOU, and other victims of sexual abuse, and I care about FAMILIES, your family and how YOUR sexual abuse must have disrupted your own family ...

... AND I also care about those with family members on a Public Registry who have the potential for being victimized and living in SHAME for the rest of their lives. Anyone who has been a victim and has been silenced KNOWS SHAME. No one in America deserves to live in shame. We live in the GREATEST COUNTRY ON EARTH. Shame is only supposed to move us more quickly into a different action to keep us safe from harm, and if the statistics about recidivism are right with only about 5% or less of citizens on the Registry we are doing SOMETHING RIGHT.

THERE IS HEALING FOR ALL OF US ... i know that ... I pray now and every day that one day you will know that too ...

BLESSINGS TO YOU VALERIE -- HEALING BLESSINGS ALWAYS.