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How should I feel......

NicoleDavis
NicoleDavis
Everyone, let me just say normally I am a very sweet and sensitive person. I really care of others feelings and therefor I try to help as much as I can. This is my question... a few minutes ago I went outside and I ran into my step son. Me and him always talk. We have not seen one another in months though. Well he was next door at a neighbors house. I ghuess the neighbor was having a small party. He said hello and when he moved aside SHE came from behind him. I couldnt move.she ran up to me hugged me and said hello. I couldnt move...it was my husbands daughter the same one who swore under oath that he sexually molested her years ago. I can understand her being a pressured kid long ago but your older now and you know right from wrong but yet you cant bring yourself to tell what really happened all those years ago.She said hello and had the nerve to ask me how her dad was doing(do you think she was being funny),"what can I tell her? the truth," my husband is now in a wheelchair for life due to insufficient medical care because you lied." How can I ever forgive her? I mean I forgave the son because basically he told the truth on the stand.He testified that He never ever saw his dad touch his sister. Never heard a scream at night. She never confided in him. NOTHING after a long time I was able to begin talking to him again. we even rode the bus together to go visit my husband a long time ago. My question is this the son I forgave but I will never forget. The daughter ripped not only MY world apart, But my husbands, our other kids, Our home EVERYTHING. I dont mean to sound spiteful but am I being a (BITCH) cause I cant forgive her. I could not look her in the eye. I just wanted to slap her. (am I wrong?)my husband forgives them both but I cant.ADVICE PLEASE!
ThoughtAsWeak
ThoughtAsWeak
I've heard someone summarize up forgiveness like this: unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. You don't forgive another for their benefit, but for yourself.

His daughter coming forward now may make no difference to your husband's case now. So holding a grudge against her doesn't accomplish anything.
spock152
spock152
Look at it this way , forgive her and let God handle the rest of it . When the young lady lied about me i was furious and wanted to do her harm . But now years later i have forgiven her and let God have her , She has Had Three or Four Kids and an abusive husband , which she is now divorced from and she is not even 25 yet . She will have an even harder life than i have .
rewdiazepam
rewdiazepam
For many years I was very angry and bitter with the so-called "victim."

When she decided to come forward in 2005, I decided to forgive her, even though we could not get her recantation in court.

I finally decided that both she and I had been through enough and it was time to have a peaceful soul, so I quit hating.

I finally realized that hating is self-destructive----and I was just tired. Hate also wears you out both emotionally and physically.

Actually I really felt sorry for her. She was eight years old at the time and just a puppet for some very evil people. In a way, she is also a victim.

Since her testimony against me, her entire life has fallen apart. She married, had two kids and then her husband left her for another woman; her dad was killed in an awful car wreck a few years after my trial; her parents had divorced a year earlier; she lost one child one day after he was delivered. Now she lives in a run down shack with her only means of support being Welfare.

Sometimes the chickens come home to roost and in my case, they certainly did for her.

rewdiazepam
hurtingfamily
hurtingfamily
Amen forgive and let God have her. handle her ..revengance is his not ours .hs will repay saith the Lord.we forgive and put it in God handz .ivd bee. Hurt so much iin my life .hsd to forgive so i can have peace .and not be torme ted..Even to this day i still feel the pain the loss etc ..and when that pain shows up .the hurtful .memories of it all .o ly way to cope with it anothrr day .has to put it in God hands to help me to not think of it all and rebuke tge torme t satN tries to put on me .they may have hurt us .but if we get in rage and bow down to that pain in a not good way it will only make us have more unpeace.torment depression .anger .which is t good .forgive thoe who persecute u .revile .false accuse .speak il.or those whom hurt us .forgive .
coolrich001
coolrich001
I believe in forgiveness but I never forget. You don't have to like her, just forgive her. There are many that I barely tolerate and that's it.
Nakohichi
Nakohichi
When those ICE agents busted in on my son and accused him of producing child porn, and when he had to go to the police station to get fingerprinted, and all the police at prison that he had to deal with. He still does not hold a grudge. He said they're doing what they think they're supposed to do. He just says they're ignorant.
I'm glad he never held onto any anger. It hurts you more than it hurts those who have done you harm.