I'm sorry I wish I had an answer or suggestion for you. I know it hurts when your kids are hurting. But, I am sure under all of the circumstances you are doing the best you possibly can.

Mom,

Don't beat yourself up over this as there is not one thing you did wrong or could have done to prevent this.

Your son's crime was having sex with an underage young lady when he was 17 years of age. This, BTW, was the type of consensual sex that teens have.

i have to remind you that teens like sex. It is fun, especially when all the testosterone is flowing so freely as it does with a 17 year old male and all the desires of a young woman just exploring her sexuality are present. Teens have sex. Hell, people have sex.

Sex is a normal part of humanity. Without it, you or I would not even be here.

It is so disgusting that society continues to criminalize normal teen behavior. This young lady was not an eight year old child. I do not know her age, but I assume she was in her early teens. He did not rape her.

If she had been very young, it might be different, but she was 14 years old----not a kid, but a young lady.

Frankly, neither of these kids----and they were just kids----really knew what they were doing.

Using the criteria that society now uses, I would have been a sex offender when I was very young. I had sex with my 16 year old GF when I was 20 years old and wound up marrying her. We had two children together and I know I was not a sex offender.

Society has actually made your son a victim himself. No child should be in jail because he had sex with a 14 year old when he was 17 years old.

Your son is a sex offender only because of some ridiculous laws being passed by a very Puritanical society. Morally he is no sex offender and certainly no criminal.

I am embarrassed for this country that we are so damn stupid.

rewdiazepam

Well said Rew!

Agree. This is embarrassing. Pathetic, actually, that we judge normal behavior as wrong and punish people forever for it. This is truly insane.

Momfrommo, we are will you and care about you and your children. Please feel free to vent with us.

Ooops. I meant, "We are with you!"

Ty everyone.. Very well said rew.. And I know there aren't any real words to make it all better.. Just happy there are a few places I can speak and vent freely (so to speak) about this stuff.. I do have friends and family who ate aware and very very supportive.. But I still don't say to many things publicly about our situation..

Well said Rew! Teenage sex has been going on for decades! My mother was around 14 or 15 when she got married and had my oldest brother.My dad was 12 years older than her. My friends and I matured early and became sexually active and went out with older guys. The guys our age were too immature.

It's a tough thing because there are older guy or women who intice teens and preteens but there's just the opposite. There's so many different circumstances and it's tragic the way the punishments are the same despite different circumstances.

My son's charges are first degree yet it was consensual.

My sons situation was consentual as well.. When the doctor got the cops involved tho it freaked the girl out I believe and she changed her story.. So he now faces 6 felonies at only 17 yrs old.. :'(

It's in these situations where I just wonder why the cops don't polygraph the alleged victims. If it's he said she said, the poly both of them.

momfrom

There are very good curriculum materials for homeschooling on the web, There are many kids that do very well in homeschooling with guidance from one or both parents, many states have a homeschool association that may help also. You can then do class work in many cases that only take hours a day.

You would still need outside activity's so not to isolated the children but it is workable.

It is strange most rso are not allowed to be on school property even when their children attend, then many of the children get harassed to nearly a breaking point, which makes another victim, so much for the registry protecting children. Try to take one day at a time, be strong for the children and I hope it works out.

Vent anytime you need too.

Regards
buildingupslow