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This is a PM between my good friend REW and I he suggested I share it and get some feedback
When they told me my record was expunged and that I didn't have to register i broke down. It was like a dream. I couldn't stop crying. No one knows the hell that we face. I have anxiety because of everything that I have to do as a sex offender. At some points its so bad I feel like i am dying.
It won't be real completely until my wife and I can live together without residency restrictions, until I can get a job and support my family, until I don't have to register a new vehicle or a new place of employment or until idk if it will ever be real. its all I have known for the last 15 years. It won't be real until I have the paperwork in my hands stating that I am off of the registry and I take that into the police station and I "register" for the last time.
For the last 15 years I wasn't Josh Murdoch I was a registered sex offender. Its who I am and who I have become. I feel like in a way part of my identity has been stripped from me but in a good way. its like i was born again and I can do anything with my life. Where before there were so many restrictions and so many rules that what was the point of trying when I would have to jump thru all these hoops to get a job or to take my kids to school or anything. I have such a fear of police officers that Its unreal.
Thanks for all of your support. Its nice to have a friend whom has to go thru what I do/did.
When they told me my record was expunged and that I didn't have to register i broke down. It was like a dream. I couldn't stop crying. No one knows the hell that we face. I have anxiety because of everything that I have to do as a sex offender. At some points its so bad I feel like i am dying.
It won't be real completely until my wife and I can live together without residency restrictions, until I can get a job and support my family, until I don't have to register a new vehicle or a new place of employment or until idk if it will ever be real. its all I have known for the last 15 years. It won't be real until I have the paperwork in my hands stating that I am off of the registry and I take that into the police station and I "register" for the last time.
For the last 15 years I wasn't Josh Murdoch I was a registered sex offender. Its who I am and who I have become. I feel like in a way part of my identity has been stripped from me but in a good way. its like i was born again and I can do anything with my life. Where before there were so many restrictions and so many rules that what was the point of trying when I would have to jump thru all these hoops to get a job or to take my kids to school or anything. I have such a fear of police officers that Its unreal.
Thanks for all of your support. Its nice to have a friend whom has to go thru what I do/did.
I.e. in CA if you get your charges set aside / expunged / dismissed (which will NOT terminate the registration requirement) at least you can truthfully answer on, say, a job application 'no' to the question if you were convicted of a crime. On the court web site your status will change from 'guilty' to 'not guilty'. In CA many lifetime registrants are (technically) not convicted of a crime.
It seems strange that you are not required to register but are subject, under threat of criminal prosecution, to all restrictions. Then exactly what is the point of getting off the registry?
They will expunge some allegations and some Juvenal crimes.
The only advantage to being off is I'm not publically listed (of course in this day and age cops know where you are if they want to) and I don't have to report in person every year and pay them $100.
Otherwise nothing.
Although I think the laws in your state are prime to be challenged - that is real BS -
But I'm the primary bread winner in the family with a great job I don't want to risk losing.
I have been on probation for 17 years.
But there are news stories from neighboring towns - a guy arrested in a playground even through he hadn't had to register for years. Another of a father coaching a little league team being arrested for being in a park. He didn't need to register since 2007, but they arrested him.
Another story of a man playing an adult league basketball on park district property- arrested.
I even wrote to IL Voices our reform group and they had spoken to the state police who said they enforce the law as written and it's written as those convicted.
I tell my husband it takes one neighbor who knows I was registered or one officer who knows me to question why I'm at a school or park and it all comes down. It's not worth the risk.
Halloween makes me most sad. My kids want me to dress up. I can't. They want me to go trick or treating or to the church's 'trunk or treat' and I can't.
With my kids at the age to start school soon we need to be making decisions on where we land.
I truly don't want to break the law even if I think it's unconstitutional and stupid.
And yes- there are some states I can move to and not worry about having to register. Others (Nevada) have 25 year tier for my crime - I'd have to register for a while and others (FL, CA) have life.
Others (GA, CO) I would have to initially register and petition off through the courts.
All states I've read have a 'who has to register' section. And they all basically say the same thing - your requirement to register is the same as though you committed the same or similar crime in that state. Unless the sentence in the state you can't from is longer - then it applies. ( so once on for life always for life)
So in Nevada CP possession is 25 years on the register. If I moved there I'd have to assume that requirement.
In MN they are 10 years so I'd be able to move there no notification to anyone.
In GA although my crime is 15 years in order to get off you have to go to court and get approved. So I'd have to register there and petition off per GA laws. CO is similar.
It is such a blurry line. How would FL know if I moved there? Well my fear is a traffic stop or license scan or even job related background check might disclose this info and they'd go after me for not registering, you know?
So for my peace of mind because I want to be law abiding I'd move to a state where I'd be legal not hiding.
Most states have verbiage saying anyone convicted of crimes on or after XXX date and all of them go back prior to my conviction. Some go back to the 70's.
So I qualify as having to register. Next is to know how long that requirement is.
Just like here in IL my 'sentence' ( I had no jail just one year probation) was up 17 years ago. But I had to keep registering until IL ended me.
Going to any other state I adopt their laws on length and restrictions.
I'm a Midwest girl at heart but you never know when circumstances will have me go east.