Families of Prisoners Support Group
This community is dedicated to families that have been disrupted by prison. Having a loved one incarcerated or having been incarcerated comes with its own unique challenges that require support and understanding. Join the group to find others who know what you're going through, and to seek advice or share your experience.
I fully understand your anger and frustration.
I was in the system as an inmate for eight years and have registered as a sex offender for 14 years for a crime I did not even commit, so allow me to help you better understand the criminal justice system in this country.
As Americans, we like to think of the justice system in this country as something fair and honorable and one in which people---even the poor---- can at least receive a semblance of fairness.
For all of our claims that this nation is a Godly nation and that we subscribe to truth, justice, and the American way, the justice system is neither fair nor honorable.
It is neither. It IS only about two things: money and power---and to hell with the poor guy who is accused and arrested with a crime.
Instead, it is all about people and groups of people using offenders, even before they are convicted, for monetary gain and about DAs seeking a conviction at all costs to further their career.
Our system continues to stay in this cesspool of disgrace because there simply are too many people making too much money off the system for there to be any kind of incentive for it to be cleaned up.
And who suffers? The lowly inmate and/or his family that has to fight like hell just to hope of getting a fair shake.
Just think about it. Private prisons, prison corporations, parole officers, GPS manufacturers, polygraphers, law enforcement at the state and local level, COs in prison, psychologists, etc. all use inmates and those accused as a means to make money.
Not only does a steady influx of inmates in and out of the criminal justice system assure that they will stay gainfully employed, but there is an even bigger, insidious reason: it is because of the perceived crime problem that these agencies, particularly law enforcement, receive HUGE federal grants---hundreds of thousands of dollars-- in the form of money to fight crime.
If the crime problem was ever drastically reduced and the prisons emptied, a lot of people would be out of a job-----and they certainly do not want that.
I can remember a time when I was a teen---and even later----the law enforcement drove around in a dusty old care a decade old; that is all they could afford. Now, with the federal grants, they can all cruise around in a shiny, new SUV with the the extras that costs close to $60.000 dollars. This is what federal grant money is used for.
You see the same thing in the departments of corrections and the Bureau of Prisons. Have you ever noticed that many prison facilities are located near a very small town? The prison industry----and make no mistake about it, it is a damn industry----creates jobs and employment for the people who live in those piddly towns. If the prison population was diminished, the entire area would feel a distinct economic crunch.
Ever notice why now days an inmate can rarely discharge all this sentence while in prison and come out with a clean slate to start all over? In my day an inmate could do that. In fact that is what I did. I discharged my entire 20 year sentence in eight years so when I was released I was not under control of the state. But they do not do that much these days. Why? Money. They know that by keeping a guy on paper, it insures a steady flow of money in the form of federal grants to monitor these offenders.
There is another method that law enforcement uses to fleece money from the system. It is the drug forfeitures they use when they arrest a drug offender. They take his house, his car, and "anything which was used to facilitate the crime." What do they do with these forfeitures? They auction them off and the money is funneled back into law enforcement. This forfeiture scheme is so profitable that they will arrest a guy for a minor drug charge and take almost everything he owns. I notice they are doing the same thing with some child pornography cases as far as forfeiture is concerned.
Everyone wants a piece of the pie.
DAs use defendants as a method to keep getting re-elected. The higher the conviction rate, the better chance of the DA getting re-elected. The media has demonized offenders so much that the general public does not care if the DA wants to "put away" all offenders.
And let's not leave out the politicians. They have to milk this wretched system also. Their "touch of crime" stance will continue to insure that will have another term in their cush job with better retirement and medical benefits than anyone else has. And so it continues.
That's the story of law and order---and corrections----- in this nation.
Our system has nothing to do with guilt or innocence or anything noble or honorable. It is only an adversarial system and which side can present their story in the most believable manner is the one who wins.
But not to worry, it gets even better. Wait until they start using Drones in law enforcement. And, trust me, they will.
Keep your chin up. A person can still do relatively well if he is smart and learns to outhink the people in the system. You and your guy are dealing with a short sentence and he will be fine. Your goal is to hold the fort down while he does his time and then you can go on with your life, without court dates or worrying.
This is the very reason I would go to hell and back to fight for any of the posters or their guys who find themselves in this quagmire; I know the system will do everything it can to screw people over and I do not want that. Hell, you have to have someone on your side here.
rewdiazepam
You always hit the nail on the head. Sometimes I wonder how you can be so smart and not be rich Oh, maybe you are. Rich in knowledge.
So my question to you is, how do we do anything to get this system to change? Someone just put on a post about some guy, who finally admits that the justice system is so flawed, and that prisons aren't the answer and wants to start changes in that regard. Scary and sad thing is we know that will never happen. Just as you said, I have always stated that the prison system is a money making business. I realized a long time ago that where the prisons are located are small towns that had nothing before that prison was built there, or would have nothing if that prison would close up or get smaller.
The prisons in small towns feed into the economy in so many ways. Hotels, stores, gas stations, lawyers, food industries, cleaning services, doctors, and so much more. You name it, those communities and outlying areas THRIVE because of our misery having people that we love in there.
Politicians are the ones that would have the power to change it, but they won't. That would jeopardize their careers.
There is no fairness in the justice system. People who are blatantly guilty, with witnesses to prove it, and irrefutable DNA proof still get off because they have money to buy their way out. But poor people, or middle class, who can't afford such luxuries as paying a high buck attorney to save their lives end up in prison for years. People that have done nothing wrong, but were framed, or whatever we call it by the police needing an arrest can sit for years in prison
Where is the justice in this country that is supposed to be so great??? All lies. Propaganda it's called, isn't it?
We are taught that the countries that we as a country hate spew propaganda about their country being so wonderful and ours being so terrible. But isn't that what our country does too?
Cops get a person in the interrogation room. They are terrified of what is happening to them. They may not even know why they were arrested. That cop is trained to badger them relentlessly for hours if necessary until they wear them down, frazzle them, terrify them into a confession of something that they didn't do. My son had that happen.
My fiance was badgered, coerced, and threatened by cops in the ER room after an accident. He was on morphine, and they wouldn't stop questioning him until he admitted he had drank a case of beer. He had NOT! He was so drugged up, and so terrified, and so dizzy from the med's and the car accident, that he just wanted them to stop. So he finally said I guess so. That got him 2 years in prison.
The justice system people are criminals if you ask me. They lie and do whatever they have to, to get the WIN... to put people in prison even if they did nothing. That tells you they don't care about JUSTICE, or if they got the right person. They just have to fill up the courts, jails, prisons, and keep those lawyers and judges in their fancy mansions.
Being a sex offender, having that label ruins people's lives. It affects everything they do. And when you really aren't one, but couldn't pay some fancy lawyer to get you off, you are doomed forever. That turns your life into such a nightmare that you do turn to drugs or alcohol. Seen it personally in someone that I know's life.
What a sick country we live in.
You will never see a politician that will jeopardize his career to start a campaign to make the legal system and justice system really do what it is supposed to. And not coerce people into confessing. And do whatever they can to " get their man", even if it's the wrong man.
One of the first chapters I had to read for my criminal justice classes told me that the justice system is flawed, they know it is flawed, it needs to be changed, but probably never will be.
THEY TEACH THAT!!!
So now it is time to figure out how to rally everyone together, and make a loud noise. Make our voices be known. BUT HOW REW??? What could we possibly do to make a difference? You are going to say it's hopeless, aren't you?
I cannot remember the exact statistic, but let's say that the US has 2 million inmates. If those 2 million inmates have at least 8 friends and family that give a damn about what is happening to them, that is 16 million voices to start protesting in some way, right?
Tell us something that would get us started to help change this... if that is possible at all.
No, it is not hopeless, but several things need to change in this country for there to ever be any positive change in the criminal justice system or the prison system of this country.
First and foremost, someone needs to start caring about human beings as people---not as someone they can use to further their career or someone to make money from or someone that can be tossed aside if they make a mistake. People are NOT statistics. People are real and they COUNT.
I care about people----particularly the underdogs and disenfranchised. That is probably the main reason I come here and over at the "Families of Sex Offender" board. I am certainly not rich, but I am not at all interested in money. I am not powerful nor would I ever want to be, but I do have some wonderful friends. I do not judge others, even those in prison for what they may or may not have done wrong, because I am not omnipotent and do not have the knowledge to judge others and because it is just plain wrong for me to judge another human being.
The leaders of this country----and a bunch of its citizens----need to take a lesson in how to treat their fellow man with respect. Such a simple concept. Everyone claims to treat everyone equally, but most rarely do.
I could sit here and type for the next ten years and explain what is wrong with the system, but I would just be preaching to the choir.
I want instead to give my humble opinion on how this mess can be corrected. You might brace yourself as some of them are a little radical, but I am a progressive thinker, a liberal.
There are at several things terribly wrong with our system, but there are three areas which must be corrected if we ever want to clean up the system.
1) The politicians must stop passing so many laws that make almost everything and anything a felony offense and they need to stop using a "tough on crime" stance to keep getting re-elected. We must abolish the mandatory minimums for some crimes, especially drug crimes. Taking the discretion out of the judges' hands and giving it to some of these nutcases in Congress is just insane.
There are too many people being convicted of too many crimes on the book with prison sentences that are far out of proportion to the nature of the crime.
We need to lock up only the people who are dangerous to society, not the people we are just mad at.
2) The media must stop sensationalizing crimes and refrain from putting so much emphasis on crime that it scares the citizenry half to death.
3) The prison system and the people who make so much money off the backs of inmates and their FAMILIES need to stop. The profit motive needs to be put to rest.
Any kind of solution has to start with the politicians that want so badly to get re-elected that they use the prevention of crime as one of their talking points. Why do they want to get re-elected so badly? Because a politician has a cushy job with a nice retirement and better benefits than anyone else in the country.
We have to stop make being a politician such an easy and profitable venture. My proposal is that politicians are paid no more than just an adequate salary. Like everyone else they have to purchase their health insurance coverage and can have no better retirement than the average citizen. Also we need to make it illegal with a strict punishment if they receive any kind of gift from a third party, a private company, or a lobbyist. Lobbyists that "buy votes" in exchange for political contributions just reeks of possible injustices. Please note that the lobbyists of private prison corporations funnel millions of dollars over to politicians. Wonder why?
This would stop making it so attractive being a politician. The only people who would want to run for office would be those that really cared about the good of the government, the good of the people. And we need some form of term limits whereby some politician cannot make it a career. In short, we want patriotic and caring people in office, not the greedy bunch we have now.
To do most of this, we need people---everyone---to get out and vote these scoundrels out of office when they are not doing a good job FOR THE PEOPLE. If someone does not care for their country and has not done a good job for the people, we need to vote him out. If the next guy does no better, we need to vote him out. As citizens, we need to keep doing that until the politicians realize that if they don't work FOR THE PEOPLE and not some corporation that gave them thousands for their re-election campaign, they too will be voted out. After a few cycles of this, politicians will put forth a better effort to help the people of this country.
These selfish politicians who are turning this country into a cesspool of mediocrity did not come into power by some military coupe----they did not force their way into office. No, we INVITED them in when we voted them in.
I know that most of the posters on the board I frequent really have very little money. But remember, you are equal to the most powerful man in this country when it comes time to go to the ballot box. Your one vote is the same as the one vote of someone wealthy and in a power position.
The DAs and prosecutors should not be an elected official. The reason is that the public, who is very ignorant with matters pertaining to the criminal justice system, will vote for the DA with the highest rate of conviction and not the candidate who might see that true justice is done---justice for the victim and a fair sentence for the perpetrator. Instead prosecutors should be appointed every two years by a panel of informed and fair citizens.
There is an old saying, " People get the kind of government they deserve," which means we, as citizens, deserve bad things when we vote for politicians that do a poor job representing the people.
The media. The media must refrain from sensationalizing any story that has to do with crime. We must demand that. If they continue to misrepresent the facts regarding crime, defendants, and prisons; we do one of two things: 1) we turn the TV set off and write and tell them why, or 2) we contact the sponsors of their shows and let them know that we will stop buying their products if they continue to advertise on a program that spreads lies.
The equation the media uses is this: sensational crime = more people watching = higher ratings = more advertisers = more air time is spent for advertising company's products = more money for the news station or network, whether it is MSNBC. FOX news, or CNN.
When you dry up their money supply by having advertisers pull their TV adds, they will see the light and present us with a more factual, two-sided argument to our problems with law and order in this country.
The old saying that "money talks," is so very true.
The prison system and criminal justice system. We have to take the profit motive out of our legal system and the prison system. Why are prisons so profitable? Here is why----the prison over crowding is a product of several things: a) too many inmates because b) we have too many politicians making everything against the law in this country because c) passing all these laws quenches the public's thirst as the public wants to fee safe, d) the public does not feel safe because of bad reporting through the media as the media takes every story with any kind of crime element and sensationalizes it, e) the public is afraid of crime, so they vote for the "tough on crime" candidate
Here is the equation for this----- politicians pass too many laws to appear "tough on crime" so they can be re-elected = more laws means more arrests and potential inmates = more inmates means more state and federal grants to "fight our crime epidemic" in this country = more money is funneled into the system = the extra money funneled into the system is a huge profit motive since only a fraction funneled into the system is used for inmate care = more money = more prisons, especially private prisons can be built or leased = these prison need to be kept at `100% capacity to be more profitable = more people make money by building these prisons = more prisons mean more employment to those that are unemployed = everyone has a piece of the pie and everyone is happy.
Except the inmates and the families of inmates----they are the ultimate loser in all this.
Now specifically, what can the ladies with a loved one in prison do to help clean up the system? First everyone needs to research who to vote for. Too many people vote against their self-interests. Get the word out to family and friends who you think is the best candidate and why.
Then you have to unite and put a human face on this problem. Write letters, talk to politicians, approach politicians in droves as a group. These ideas work but there is a method I think which will be even more effective.
Go on a campaign to educate the public what the unfair laws do to your children and how they have been negatively affected by the unfairness of the criminal justice system. Get the media involved. Have your children tell their stories about how the unfairness of the system has made their life a hardship. Show people that the entire family has been affected, and in the case of the children, they have done nothing to deserve this.
The politicians don't give a damn about the inmate or the probationer, so anything they say will just be disregarded, but they do care about the children. I explain all this over at the other board.
You have to involve your kids enough to be effective, but not so much that it would appear you are exploiting and using your children. That too, was addressed over at the sex offender board.
It is easy for politicians to blow off an adult, but much more difficult to do that with a younger child.
We have to get the families stories out there.
I am good with critical thinking and I have been in the system so long that I know what the problems are and how many of them could be fixed. But I am not particularly good at putting a campaign together or how to do it, so I leave that up to the more resourceful posters.
So I have explained what I think are the biggest problems with our system and I have given a few examples of how this can be stopped.
But there is one factor that we cannot overlook-----people in power do not care about people as human beings, only as a means to get richer or keep their power position.
We need people who only want to do the right thing as leaders and who sees a human side to inmates and their families. Too many politicians see inmates and their families only as statistics and never look at the human suffering that this "tough on crime" stance has taken us.
If you are confused and it seems as if my argument has gone around and around in circles, it is because it has. All these factors work with each other and are intertwined to create a system so complex than nobody wants to attempt to reform it.
The politicians use the media, which in turn sensationalizes everything against anyone accused of a crime and here we go again. Wash, rinse, and repeat.
There is one quote here that we must not forget---"Whoever controls the media controls the minds of the public."
The people of this country need to remember some basic values which we seem to have forgotten. Too many people in this country have no idea what is going on and cannot see the "forest for the trees."
Those are a few of my thoughts. I have many others. I am now working over at the "Families of Sex Offenders" on a project and a lot of my posts are over there. There is a particularly interesting post on how we can stop some of the injustices the family has to endure, especially the children, when the father goes to prison, and how it can affect the entire family. I compared it to the way the mothers and wives turned into bulldogs to get the War in Vietnam stopped.
The name of the thread over there is "Families and Children of Registrants." Many people made some valid points on how we can get this nonsense stopped. That particular post dealt with the sex offender registry, but it can just as easily apply to the families who have a loved one in prison.
Keep the faith,
rewdiazepam
I'm new and learning a lot, my boyfriend was just sent to jail, the living conditions that he sharing with me makes me sick, this is America just because people are in jail or prison, doesn't mean they deserve to get treated like shit. I'm finding out that the food that they are serving in this system is not food for humans, it horrible and the lack of cleanness is disgusting. Someone should write the president about this. Right now my boyfriend is sleeping on a cold floor on a mattress next to a toilet he afraid of catching something. I now people fuck up and they say if you can do the crime than you can do the time! But dam do prisoners really deserve this? There Still American's I hear in some countries prisoners get better treatment.
The conditions in some of the county jails across this country are deplorable.
You ask, why do the people of this country, many who claim to be Christians, allow their fellow man to be treated this way? The short answer to this is that the media and the politicians have demonized anybody and everybody who has gone to jail or prison. In fact, they have demonized them to such a degree, with the help of the media, that people see inmates as some sort of subhuman creature that deserves nothing but contempt.
The food is just terrible---soured milk and moldy bread is some of the things I saw in the county. Peanut butter sandwiches and warm unsweetened tea every day. Sometimes instead of peanut butter, we got some kind of "mystery meat" which sort of looked like bologna, but I am not sure what it really was. Of course, nobody cared except our families because we were felons.
The good thing is that once he leaves the country jail and transferred to a prison, the conditions are much, much better. They can cover up things like bad food, no ventilation, uncleanness in a county jail, but it is much more difficult to do in a state or federal prison.
I read a report and in my state of Oklahoma, they spend $2.89 each DAY for all three meals on each inmate. That is less than one dollar for each meal. That tells the story right there.
Write the President? The president or any politician does not care, as they are elected by people that do not like inmates or prisoners anyway. No politician wants to ever be seen as "soft on crime" as it would greatly hamper their re-election chances and they would lose their cushy job with all the great benefits.
You are right, no prisoner deserves this. No human being deserves this. Hell, I treat my dogs better than this.
It hurts and I have been fighting the system for prison reform for fifteen years, since my release from prison. I have made several people stop and listen----and many agree with me because I am well respected in this area----but we have a long way to go.
Just keep the faith, and realize that someday your guy will be out of this miserable system. Keep your eyes and thoughts on that discharge date and he can be with you again.
rewdiazepam
The county is the worst part until they get to a prison and hopefully your brother will never have to experience that. You will have many questions and have come to the right place. We have very caring people of these sites, they have probably saved many life's. No one will know who you are even if this is a public site. You can private message me or anyone else if you want your post private. Stay strong and good luck.
Debbie
Hub has lost at least 40 lbs since he was in prison. They love to only give them carbs, since it fills them up. They only look at calories they need to eat, not the nutrition they need. They lack in vitamins necessary to their health.
My mind is not in a place to tell family and friends what he was actually convicted for, even though he's innocent, because some crimes attach such a stigma to one's life that I'm just not ready for a full disclosure. But if given a choice between friends & family and him, I'll always choose him!