Well, well, well. What did we all tell you?

I am more happy for you than you will ever realize.

All the ladies here told you that there might be a delay and to be patient. These ladies have been through this and they know what they are talking about. Listen to them.

I hope you are feeling better now. You have NOT failed, and You have NOT lost your guy.

Good things happen to those who wait.

rewdiazepam

I have no patience. I'm not kidding. I really don't and he means so much to me that I cried so hard when I saw his writing... I'm totally going to lamenate this letter. It'll be going everywhere with me! Thanks for all the support. I have not lost the man I love... He's very special... Now if he'd just call! ha ha.. He doesn't want me to see him because his hair is messy... I really don't care if his hair is messy.. .I just want to see him...

HAHA I can hear how happy you are in that post. Good news, so happy for you. YEP, we told you. But it is so hard especially at first. Your world has been turned upside down, and you don't know what to expect. I found the worst thing to ever do is watch anything on tv about prisons. It just makes us imagine all kinds of horrible things. As my fiance told me, 99% of the time NOTHING is happening, they live in sheer boredom.

That's funny he thinks you shouldn't see him because his hair is messy. They do have prison barbers. They may not be the greatest. Where mine was it was free. Sometimes it costs a couple bucks. Towards the end mine always just let his grow out til he could get it cut at home. He looked like Grizzly Adams the last time. Huge beard and all.

You of course were going crazy. There is so many unknowns. I know court dates etc are really nerve wracking, but at least when they get started you have more of an idea of what you are up against.

I couldn't be happier for you. I figured you would hear from him soon. My guy said it took four days, but that's a different state.

Now you just keep writing to him. Tell him anything and everything. I used to make copies of news articles about things happening in our community so he knew what was going on and felt connected to his world out here. I sent pictures, asked his advice, made him part of our life even if he wasn't in here. You need to keep really busy to get through this, and then you also have lots to tell him. You find ways to get through it.

I did the laying in bed and crying for weeks thing. It only made us both miserable.

You go have some sort of good day. And tell us about that, too. Ok?

I am so happy for you. Just give him time i think eventually he will change his mind about letting you see him. Like everyone said just continue to write i know my husband loves recieving letters even if he can't write back as much! On the hair part maybe he can find someone to cut his hair!!! My husband is in a strict prison when it comes to their hair they cant have any facial hair nor can they have any hair past the top of there ears! The warden makes sure they all shave everyday or they go to the hole its some crazy mess..........Hold your head up and no we are all here for you! I hope you get a phone call soon. Dont get discouraged if it takes awhile...just know he loves you. Take care of yourself

See how much happier you are now that you have a goal to achieve forboth of you? Put all your energy into that lawyer and his pre trial and trial dates. The payoff will be wonderful and worth everything. Still try and get in to see a doctor to help you cope with all this chaos. I'm so happy you have some kind of relief right now. It really boosts you up and helps you accomplish even the simplest tasks :-)

Happy dance, doing the happy dance :)
Trust in God everything will be fine. Whatever happens remember it's God's will. He has a plan for you.

Yes we are doing the happy dance, and I want you to know that just a short while ago, bambosnipes was sounding really down in the dumps, and look at her positive remarks now. It gets a bit easier every day. You just need encouragement, and determination to not let this get you down. It will, but it depends on how low you will go on how you react. Learn that everything while they are in goes in slow motion, and pretty much you don't get any help from the prison staff, or the courts or the lawyers. They do not care about us, or the people in prison or in the system. They do not care what we are going through. But we care. We care about getting each other through these ordeals.

Keep your chin up, things do get better, then you will have some bad times, but they become more tolerable, if that's the right word, eventually. We learn to adapt to this, just as they do. We may hate it, but fighting it does not help at all. If you can teach yourself to learn that when things seem bad, and you assume the worst, it probably is a simple explanation. Oh I am the queen of worrying and thinking the worst things have happened, and 95% of the time, it's pretty much nothing.

C, see how far you've come already? There's strength and hope in your heart; just don't let the circumstances cast ugly, scary shadows that creep into your soul. Sometimes, there are so many things going through my head that if I don't write them down on paper, I end up forgetting one of them.

Make a list of things that you're thinking about and leave some space for jotting down ideas for solutions. Don't try to do it all at once either; take one thing at a time, and you'll get through it. You can do it. Yes, you can!!!

Woo hoo! I am so truly happy to hear that you heard from him... It all gets better from here. Sure, there will be a bad day here and there but it should get a tiny bit better every day. I hope you can start healing now!

Thank you all of you! I am doing a lot better tonight... I'm not crying yet.. I've been so busy trying to find lawyers.. and trying to find a way to pay for the lawyer if I can get one.. I'm sure the tears will come later... I'm going to try doing a bake sale to raise some money... I don't really want to take on a 2nd job but if I have to, I will. Now that I know what I need to do, its just a little frustrating finding out how to accomplish it. Magazines and books I can figure out for him.. .hiring a lawyer? That is going to be expensive... I guess I'll figure it out though... one way or another...

Is there any way you could do a benefit spaghetti dinner or something like that? Maybe invite his friends/coworkers and any neighbors, etc? Just a thought. I see flyers for things like that all time.

That's totally awesome:) iam doing the happy dance for you too :)

I don't know if you have this where you live, but I used to do market research group things where you go and try new food products and grade them. It helps companies decide what products the public would buy. You get paid good for it. And I also got laundry detergent to use for a month, then go to a meeting to let them know how you liked it, etc. Got paid for that too. I haven't found any of these in my area since I moved to Wisconsin, but we had them in MN. I will try to figure out what exactly it was called and let you know. They would have me come sometimes once a month, sometimes more. The pay was sometimes really good, and sometimes a few bucks. Worth the drive though.

That is funny that you said that ihate. i used to work for a company and that is what we did. i was an intern when i hired in. we called them focus groups. ours were all automotive, but i think we paid everyone mileage, bought them an awesome free lunch and they each got like $60 bucks for a few hours time. not too shabby... :) i am looking to do some stuff like that to make some extra bucks too, so if you or anyone else has ideas please keep em coming! I have been toying around with the idea of getting a job, but my 4 year old son gets very panicky when i even go to the bathroom. he follows me around everywhere thinking i am going to leave him alone. poor guy. he was taking a nap the other day and i took the dogs out back to go to the bathroom. he woke up and ran outside in his socks screaming for me... i cant be gone all day, i think it would just be too much for him right now. got to do baby steps i think and ease him into it. :)

I can hear the happiness in your post!! When you are looking for a lawyer don't just take the first one you talk with. ask around and see if your friends have every heard of him, also see if your boyfriend can get the name of a few lawyers from some of the other inmates they may be able to help too. It will all fall into place, just try and be patient.
Good luck I'm so happy for you.