Families of Prisoners Support Group
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So we are down to 90 days and I am soooo nervous/excited! I don't know what to expect he is going back to his parents house we game never lived together before and we figured it would be an easier adjustment especially tell my house gets done and my son and I move in and get settled!
I am trying to prepare myself not to be pushy but I know that will be hard! I am just so anxious to see what the future holds and for both my son and I to have the relationships with him we both deserve! I'm just sooooo nervous with both excitement and feeling like ugh how stressful it's gonna be with all the restrictions of parole and probation. Just needed to get this out.
I am trying to prepare myself not to be pushy but I know that will be hard! I am just so anxious to see what the future holds and for both my son and I to have the relationships with him we both deserve! I'm just sooooo nervous with both excitement and feeling like ugh how stressful it's gonna be with all the restrictions of parole and probation. Just needed to get this out.
2---Relax. This will all take care of itself in time.
3---Take one day at a time.
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Keep talking to us. Everyone will help you get through these tense few days you have left. Just remember it's almost over. The missing him, the waiting for calls, the worry, the sad, lonely times. It will be over in 90 days. CELEBRATE... and love that man with all your heart and have a good life.
Just remember not to be too clingy or demanding of his time at first. He will want to be with you, but they are also real used to not being with us, not being a couple, so it is an adjustment. Don't let him go too fast at things. They want to buy things they couldn't buy, go places they couldn't go. Do everything they were deprived of. Try to dissuade him from pushing himself in a million directions too fast. It is all there waiting for him, and you too, just take it slow.
Mine didn't. Wanted it all, right away, and then we had issues. Not trying to be a wet blanket, just advice. Give him space, let him be with you when he wants, and if he needs to just be in the bedroom watching men show's alone for awhile, let him. Let him make choices what you make for dinner, or where you go out to eat. BUT don't let him take over everything. It's kinda like starting over, depending on how long he has been gone.
You have to learn when to cuddle, and when not to smother.
I tended to want to be around him every single second. I had missed him so much, and he was used to being alone. ( not being together while he was in.) These are just things I wish I would of done differently when he got home Sept 2013... but we messed up, so just take it slow.
I think most men when they get home do just fine, and don't go back. Mine did. So I really want you to make this the best time for both of you, to make it work out, to be happy, to prosper and learn from this and then say OK our new life has begun, let's decide where we go from here. Or say, honey, let's not worry about anything for a few weeks. Just live, love and laugh.
Him going to his parent's first, may be a way of easing into the situation, as long as MOM doesn't mother him too much. I don't know if that would be the case or not. Then everything will just flow together gently. It won't be such a big transition right away.
I wish you much luck, love and happiness. I am very happy for you.
we are very excited and hopeful. I took off the first week he is home just so we can do what we want and if that is nothing but staying in bed and laughing and watching whatever he wants..then that's what we will do.
I too have been advised to just take it slow and that is the plan. he has asked for not a big "welcome home" party. he doesn't want to celebrate this as it wasn't a good reason that he was gone.
Just follow your heart and take it one day at a time . . .You will adjust and get back in your rhythm!