I'm glad you got to meet your guy's mom...you're right, the circumstances sucked, but it was bound to happen someday. I'm very lucky. My mother inlaw and I love each other to death. It's a great friendship...she's like another mom to me.
I don't know how things work where your guy is...but the prison system in ohio doesn't allow people to bring in clothing. It all has to be ordered in boxes through a couple approved vendors, or bought through commissary.
As for tats...lol...my Michael is a bit of an artist, and I plan to get something he's drawn tattooed on me somewhere. In fact, my sister wants to get it too...and we'll have matching tats. Michael and I are planning on having wedding rings tattooed when he gets out and we get married. I'm all for tattoos...as long as they aren't on the neck and head :) i'm not a big fan of names though, just in case...I always kinda looked at it as bad luck. It's your body though, and if you wanna put his name on it, go for it....I won't try to stop ya:)
It's great to hear that you're functioning better. It's hard to get used to, but life has to go on...just differently. don't you love that giddy girl feeling that his letters and phone calls bring? I know I do.
I can't offer much advise by way of court. I was unable to attend the hearings for my guy. Just being there, will show your support. Stay calm and collected...and don't let it get you too down. Good luck

You need to call the facility and find out what they will allow. Where I was at they allowed WHITE socks, white sneakers, and white boxers. Certain colors they will not allow and if you send the wrong color, the package will not get through the property room. I just imagine that they will allow anything that is white in color, but you need to call to make sure. White is always a safe color.

You don't have to get fancy with his clothes. Just a normal pair of sneakers that tie like you see people wear in the public. White plain boxer shorts should be fine and just get the normal white socks. But call before you buy or send to make sure it is permissible.

Personally, I hate the tattoo idea. I am of the old school and I don't care for tattoos at all, but I really abhor them on ladies. I know that is not the popular current trend, but I am conservative and old fashioned. Remember, that tattoo is more or less permanent and think long and hard before you get one. They can be taken off with a laser, but it is expensive and you can still tell the tattoo was there.

Also those tattoos fade in time even with the best of ink. You are an attractive young lady. When you get 60 years old, do you still want to have a tattoo? What if it fades? I saw a lot of tattoo work on older guys in prison and it looked awful.
As you age and your skin starts to sag and stretch, just remember that tattoo will not look nearly as "neat" as it did when you first go it. DO NOT get a tattoo that you might regret later.

But if you feel an undying need for a tattoo, please, please, please, get one on your body that you can cover up with clothes if needed. Get one on your butt, on your upper arm, or somewhere that can be covered up with clothes. There will be times, like when interviewing for a job, that you do not want any tattoos showing at all.

Personally, I think the tear drops are a horrible idea. The tear drop tattoos are like a lot of tear drop tattoos you see in prison. If you must get one, get a tiny flower, a rose or that symbol you talked about. Do you want to be 60 years old with a tear drop tattoo? I would also not have his name on there either. What if you and him break up? If you should so happen to break up with this guy, do want his name tattooed on your body when you meet your future Ryan Gosling? He might not like that too well. But to answer your original questions, yeah I think a tattoo is a crazy idea.

Now for the court part. When you go to court, more or less keep your mouth shut until your attorney asks you to speak. Don't be chewing on a piece of gum either.
Your attorney will guide you. Follow his directions. Act in court as you would act in a church---with a reverence to the court. Act presentable.

Your attorney will have you show up a few minutes before the court hearing. He will tell you what will happen. Just follow his lead.

When you go to a court hearing, wear conservative clothes. No halter tops, no mini-skirts, and no see through blouses. ha ha. Dress nicely. A nice pant suit or a dress or skirt just above the knees here sounds good to me. But dress VERY conservatively. You do not have to wear heels, but don't wear sneakers either.
Dress nicely but conservatively. I am a guy and I don't know much about how you ladies dress these days, but I do know courts do not like outlandish clothing on ladies. Have your hair fixed up nice and do be light on the make up.

I never dreamed I would be giving fashion advice to a lady, so this is a first. ha ha

Good luck,

rewdiazepm

PS Oh, BTW, did I mention to dress conservatively?

the tattoo with his name is horrible idea because Not saying this will happen but if you should break up you will regret it... I want a tattoo myself but I have yet to find something I want that I won't regret..if you want to get a tattoo with his name get it done in henna because only last about 7 days ...

when you get a tattoo get something that actually means something to you......

Good to hear your sounding better.
Ok as fair as going court rew is right dress conservative no short skirts, low hells, light on the make up and follow what your lawyer tells you he should give you a bit of a idea as to what's going to happen, yes its kinda scary the first time you go to court so deep breaths.
As for the tat well its your call on that one iam not a fan of them and neither is my man its something you have to live with for the reast of your life and I've seen a few on older people.....not a good look faded and wrinkled, and just a bit yuck. But hey its your call that one.
Have a talk to the prison and make sure you can send those things in hear we can only send in green tops, plain jox or boxer shorts and they have to get there own shoes. They should be albe to give you a list of what you can get him but then again each place is different.

Thanks everyone for the advise... Rew, you totally smashed my hopes of dressing as unconservative as possible... too bad.. ha ha.. Just kidding... I am very favorable of tattoos. I have five already.. My guy has two ... I am thinking I'll go with the strength chinese mark... I am having to be strong this year and that means a lot to me... I wanted it to also resemble something about my guy so I'll have to think about what else to add.. because tear drops resemble prison stuff I'm no longer interested in that... I'm a little scared. We are not going to trial..just the regular court beginnings... I meet with his lawyer monday night.. and providing his dad calls and makes his payment.. .we should be good to go...
I understand the court dress code... They did say I could bring in his court clothing and they don't care what I bring.. however... I don't kow about sneakers and clothing. He's been wearing jail clothes and he says as long as I bring stuff that doesn't have a lot of color he can probably wear those.. Tomorrow he is calling. Thanks everyone for all the great advise... Rew, as always, thank you for your opinion and viewpoint.. Meeting his mom I was nervous but I'm glad to finally meet her... I've heard about her for so long that it's a blessing to put a face to her name.. she is so sweet... and she cares about her son.. just as much as I do... No halter tops? No short skirts... well that just ruined my plan of being sexy... ha ha.. just kidding... I know how to dress for court.. I just don't know what to expect the first few court appearances... Kinda scared for him...

I'm for the tat. I have aways wanted a soaring eagle on my back in remembrance of my brother whom I lost 11 yrs ago. Eagles were his favorite animal. So something in rememberance of him is what I want most. I want it in color, so the money to get it is too much to spend right now, when I am spending money on things he needs.

Almost 40 and still no tat :-(

As far as clothing with him, I was able to drop off close at the PD office for trial, but I was only able to leave paints, dress shirts and ties. They wouldn't allow anything else. As for clothing for him to wear in prison, I have to order from one of the prison vendor catalogs.

thought of, I think that that is a wonderful idea... Since I have a small idea in mind for the tattoo... I figured it'd be ok.. Its something I want to do so he knows he is forever with me.. love goes deeper than skin and deeper than the soul can reach for me ... I won't get his name but I'll add something that remnds me of him... I can always cover it up if I have to... I doubt that'll ever be the case

I'm mostly conservative about body art, but I can tell you that I have a tattoo of a yellow ribbon on the back of my neck where It can be seen or hidden, depending on my hairstyle.

To me, the yellow ribbon represents faithfulness to the guys in our military as well as those who are locked up - a double remembrance for my volunteer work at the military prison. My guy loves it!