Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group
Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...
My sister is a crack addict, she hit two and half years clean from crack but relapsed half a year ago...but she drank like a fish, smoked as much as she could and slept around for over half of it (the other half she was in jail).
I am so sick of the self pity. The 'woe is me, I've been hurt so many times and it's made me stronger but I'm still just human'. The classic 'no one can see me hurting behind my smile' or the 'people have hurt me so bad in my life, why do I keep giving them chances'?
I seriously. Want. To. Slap. Her.
First off, get off your ass and make yourself feel better...getting drunk at every opportunity, not finding a job and cheating on your boyfriend every chance you have isn't a recipe for bliss.
Second, you obviously aren't that strong since you just jump from addiction to addiction! Strong people face life sober and with as much vigor as they can manage, they don't act like mushrooms....hiding in the dark and eating shit.
And no one knows you are hurting? YES WE DO, YOU POST IT ON FACEBOOK AT LEAST THREE TIMES A DAY! And what exactly are we supossed to do for you that you can't do for yourself? Because if you arent willing to do anything then why the hell should everyone else in your life jump to it? Take some f*cking responsibility for yourself.
And people have hurt you so bad? Take a look at yourself! And you keep giving them chances because beggars cant be choosers and there isnt a flash mob of people out there eager to be your used and abused friend! Small city means that it gets around what sort of a person you are. Like attracts like. You want people who treat you well, enjoy life and are willing to help you up.....try being that person.
I find every day she is 'sober' almost more of a battle then when shes drunk or high. Because all she does is ride the pity train around and around and around and around.
Phew....thanks for letting me get that out.
I am so sick of the self pity. The 'woe is me, I've been hurt so many times and it's made me stronger but I'm still just human'. The classic 'no one can see me hurting behind my smile' or the 'people have hurt me so bad in my life, why do I keep giving them chances'?
I seriously. Want. To. Slap. Her.
First off, get off your ass and make yourself feel better...getting drunk at every opportunity, not finding a job and cheating on your boyfriend every chance you have isn't a recipe for bliss.
Second, you obviously aren't that strong since you just jump from addiction to addiction! Strong people face life sober and with as much vigor as they can manage, they don't act like mushrooms....hiding in the dark and eating shit.
And no one knows you are hurting? YES WE DO, YOU POST IT ON FACEBOOK AT LEAST THREE TIMES A DAY! And what exactly are we supossed to do for you that you can't do for yourself? Because if you arent willing to do anything then why the hell should everyone else in your life jump to it? Take some f*cking responsibility for yourself.
And people have hurt you so bad? Take a look at yourself! And you keep giving them chances because beggars cant be choosers and there isnt a flash mob of people out there eager to be your used and abused friend! Small city means that it gets around what sort of a person you are. Like attracts like. You want people who treat you well, enjoy life and are willing to help you up.....try being that person.
I find every day she is 'sober' almost more of a battle then when shes drunk or high. Because all she does is ride the pity train around and around and around and around.
Phew....thanks for letting me get that out.
I'm sorry to hear about your sister. I really am. I've read your journals, I've admired the way you've been handling the downs of life and how strong you seem to be.
There are people who can't do the "strong thing". I'm coming to terms with that, although it hurts like hell.
Pen, I write as a therapy lol I write stories based on my life. In high school I had a teacher enter some in a contest without my knowledge and I won a national award...but I write for me so no one has seen any since. You guys on DS get to see what the people in my actual life don't.
I'm so tired of my sister. I cut her out of my life the first time, but this time I'm too tired to even do anything. I just feel lethargic on the subject, like I'm exhausted to the point of going postal if it keeps up. I don't have a sunshine and lollipop life either, but I don't do the things she does. And our childhoods and VERY similar instances, though not exact, so when she blames her childhood for issues I want to scream. She should just own up and blame HER for her issues. She did have a rough go of life, but she put herself in every single situation that went sour willingly.
Her kids are STILL paying the price and one has become an addict herself. Yet my sister is always yelling at them and telling them she needs thier support. THIER support? Where was she when they needed her? They STILL need her! I'm the one who took her middle daughter shopping for her first bra, talked her through her first period when she thought she was dying, and have worked my butt off to convince her to stay in school and every time she gets her heart broken she shows up at my door step. Her older daughter lived with her dad and had no female influence to talk all those things through with. And her son? No one in our family has seen him in years, and I can't say I blame them. Yet my sister demands they support her. She calls them ungrateful brats, but they are a product of their upbringing....once again like begets like. The things they saw, the things that happened to them....men leaving mommys bed to crawl into theirs....what does she expect?
And she's always mad at me, the 'perfect' child. Because at 26 I own my own home, I have my own business, I'm in a commited relationship. But all of it has taken hard work and alot of it is going south currently. But she seems to think it was handed to me on a silver platter and that I didn't deserve any of it. She constantly throws it into my face that I have so much and she has nothing and so I should share what I have. I am a very giving person....but I'm not going to give to her, and she sees that. I'm not perfect, and I don't claim to be. But I would be lying if I didn't think I was better then her. Not better then what she COULD be, but better then what she IS.
She says we look down on her, and we do. She's so close to the ground that how can you not? It's hard to consider her my equal when she refuses to do anything to better herself. When she flys off the handle at everything. When her integrity resembles a bullet riddled windsheild...any flick could shatter it. What does she want from us? To tell her that she's perfect as is? That we will do everything for her? And that if not equal that she's better then us?
Sorry, that was long. I'm just full of so many emotions I'm having a hell of a time expressing.