If your son is a minor you can force him to get help. In my area we have community counseling plus alot of of counselors who counsel mostly addicts. There are some who think this doesn't do any good but others who believe do all you can. Satiscally if someone gets help when young they have a much better chance of staying clean the rest of their lives. So I believe get them help. plant the seeds now so hopefully they are not using 10 yrs from now. Also kids repeat behavoirs of parents so if one parents was a alcoholic or addict the chances of your child doing the same is extremely high. It is hereditary.
My ex 's uncle was John Wilkes Booth, the man who killed Abraham Lincoln. My ex's father was a alcoholic, his grandfather was a alcoholic as was his father. My ex is a alcoholic. The Booth family had several alcoholics and mental problems. My daughter did do drugs but stopped when she was about 20. So there is hope. My other two children chose not to drink because of their father and his past plus with alcoholism on my side of the family.
I hope you can get him some help.

wow what a tough time you have! all i can do is pray for you. please tell us both of your older sons do not live with you!

OMG, cab6, I truly feel for you from the very bottom of my heart. I have 3 kids and only 1 is an addict and I just want to die. I cannot imagine the grief you must feel. I am so so sorry. You must be very strong to continue on- I admire you. Hang in there.

rehab. rehab. and rehab.
This is not your fault. But I'm sure it is a pain that you would wish on your worst enemy. I am truely sorry for you and can only hope God has a new plan ins tore for you soon.
But seriously have you done the extremes? (rehab) I know unless they want it they wont be helped. But if they are living with you, kick them out! You are not keeping them safe, you are only prolonging their ending. As I was told, detach with love. You can love your sons, but not love their habit. Tell them you will open your loving arms once again when they choose the right way in life, until then goodbye and my prayers are with you.
Please get support, go to Al-anon, anything.
God bless you!!!!

I have no comment that will ease the pain. so I'll just give you a hug and remind you to stay Safe.
Hugs.

Crap I'll say a prayer for you.
Things seem bleak now but they will get better.

My heart goes out to you. I only have 1 problem son & he's killing me. Can you get your youngest son in rehab if you have insurance?
Make a list of chores a mile long for him to do if he's not going to school.
I wish I knew an answer. I'll keep you in prayer. ((((Sending big hugs to you))))

Hugzz.. Prayers!!! Prayers!! Prayers!! i agree with katrinka

I am so sorry you are going through this. I have son who is an addict and he worries me sick. There are days I just don't want to wake up. I also have a younger son who I worry about, but he hasn't gone down that road yet. I pray he never does. You will be in my prayers. Message me if you ever want to talk.

Hang in there! My heart goes out to you

I am so sorry as well. right this moment my son is in our back cottage and I have not seen him or over 24 hours. Not sure if he is dead or alive, I am doing everything in my power not to go out and again enable him. He is living here because my husband has asked that I do not ask him to leave. My husband is dying. I am caught in a catch 22 position.

Thank you all for your advice and support. On a practical note, the police officer who arrested him said they would go lighter if he cooperates. When is this cooperation supposed to take place? The lawyer said this would be very expensive and that son would likely end up in detention, never mind HS. Is taking pills to your older girlfriend distribution?

Yes it is . And how much older is she?

She's 18 and in college, he's 17 in (was in) high school.

He would be considered a minor and she is a adult. This would not sit well with the law. She needs to be out of the picture IMO even though she is not that much older maybe he would have a better chance if she would exit the scene.

The best thing you can do is let him suffer his own consquences. If he 17 and this was a problem back when he was 15 he's needed help for along time. His drug use has been escalating for several years.
The girl friend is the least of your worries yes he's a minor but it seems he's been doing things for a few years which would of put warning signs up. He needs some type of rehab and I would try to get him court ordered to rehab not detention. By getting him into some type of rehab this will put distance between him and the girlfriend. But the more you try to pull them apart the harder they will fight to be together.