Well, as you all know, I've been on this heroin/drugs/alcohol rollercoaster ride for about 4 years now, only one on this board, but through all your stories, all your advice and Cardinals kick in the pants LOL..(which truly are a God send!).....it's to the point of I no longer feel guilty, I no longer feel remorse, and I do NOT spend my time worrying anymore. I had put him in Gods' capable hands. After the past 2 years of him being home after his jail stint, his inability to keep a job, his inability to stay in school, he finally enrolled in a school he enjoys and does REALLY well, but he wasn't working and then came the day of actual PROOF he was still using....and as I told him, it got him a one way ticket to living on the street, in his car, at the VA homeless center...then he checked out of there.

In this midst of the caos, we are moving, my hubby got the relo he was looking for to another state.....and NO he is NOT coming with us.....not a chance and I made that LOUD AND CLEAR to him, he was on his own....

So after a few weeks now, he still attended school every day, even living in his car, he is VERY resourceful I must say.....he found a place to live, he showed up yesterday with his landlord. A woman about my age, she has many homes that she invests in and her home she rents out rooms, he came across her, God only knows how, but she is pretty down to earth. She brought her truck to get his bed and bureau. she said 'I'm glad to know he has a mother'....I didn't tell her anything about his issues, he is an adult and he needs to live his own life, tell his own story when he is ready......

So, he has apologized, he has accepted that we are moving on and he now has to live his own life on his own. And we have accepted that he will NEVER be that same young boy we knew, EVER! He has destroyed his old fun loving, cute and sweet brain....he still has a good heart, he just chose to dance with the Devil.....and he has to live with that. He had a great upbringing, he had a FABULOUS home, he had so much that he CHOSE to give up.....so it is now up to him to figure it out.

I don't know why I feel so peaceful, but I do. Evidentally I have come to terms that God has a plan for us all, life is too short and you can only help those that truly want it. We tried everything, it didn't work.

So now time will tell. We will be hundreds of miles away, but he will always be in our hearts and only a FB post away....(no I didn't defriend him lol)or a call away.....he knows we love him, we know he loves us, but now he needs to love himself.

Peace to all! and thanks for being there every time! Now back to packing up the house....SO much to do, so little time! ;O)....

Hugs to all,
K