Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group
Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...
I am so angry right now. That dumbass may not be using anymore but he still has a total disregard and lack of respect for me and this family. His heroin habit, financially destroyed us. I have been covering everything since last November. I have been covering him. I have kept this family alive. I have made sure we have a place to live. I have kept our utilities on. Food on the table. Clothes on our backs. It has all come down to me. Before I found out about his addiction, I covered us, because that is what you do in a relationship. We always reciprocated before, I had no reason to believe it would be any different (keep in mind I did not yet know about the heroin). When I found out about the drugs, I took care of me and the kids. I kicked his junkie ass out. I didn't ask him for or expect anything from him. When he decided to get clean, I started helping him again. Because like many of you out there, I will support him 1000% in his sobriety. Everything has fallen on me. And now, we are still waiting for his housing allowance to come through. I understand that it can take some time and I have been patient. That I understand. I really do. But he is now receiving some cash benefits. It's not much, only $120 a month till his disability paperwork goes through. I told him when the money was deposited that I need that for rent this month. Between all the extra unexpected expenses that I had to dish out last month, I am short and that the $120 has to go to rent. He said ok. Obviously it wasn't ok. Less than 24 hours after that conversation, he let his friend John borrow $35. And he neglected to tell me about it. John just got a new job and didn't have gas money to get back and forth. Umm... I'm sorry but John's money problems fall into the NOT MY FUCKING PROBLEM category. And it's not the monetary amount that bothers me. It's the fact that he did it period. I'm struggling this month. He knew that. He saw the anxiety building up in me. And none of that mattered to him. This was the first opportunity he had to contribute to the home that I have barely kept afloat. And he chose to help out a friend instead. I am so incredibly angry right now. I have no idea what to do anymore. I have no idea what to even say to him. I'm angry.
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My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...
You have every right to be angry. I hope (and I am sure you did) that you have said exactly what you just said to us, to him.
I am pissed off for you!
Why is it that men (maybe more specifically, addicts) think its ok to be a personal atm for their friends when their own family is in need? My husband has done a similar thing several times. His defense is that he will get the money back (most of the time this is true), but I don't need the money in 2 weeks, I need it now! Arg.
Still mad and it ain't going away anytime soon.
Still mad, but concealing it a little better today.
I'd be pissed too, oh wait, I'm pissed already because mine did some dumb crap like that today.