LOVE when life throws you a bone :)

SO great that he has been given a great opportunity... I know you are happy and relieved and probably a little anxious too. Good luck to him I pray everything works out for you and him!
Hugs
Marg

great news! congratulations to him.

LIKE!

So glad your having days headed in the positive direction. Good for you.

I hope he get the job. I had to chuckle I am like you my nose is like a bood hound you can't hide that smell!

YAY! Hope things work out... Will be a confidence booster for him.

And THEN it happens! He was due today to orientation. He got the call yesterday am that he had to go for the drug test. We've been talking to him since beFORE he went for the interview, that he would need to STOP smoking right then if he had ANY prayer of passing that test and getting ON with his life. Did he listen? Apparently NOT! So he goes to the testing, he didn't want me to take him, he got a 'friend' to take him. He came home hours later, and I noticed he was VERY quiet, very unlike him. So he was out in the garage, on his computer, with his guitar and I noticed he had been crying. My heart tugged. He said he wouldn't be going to orientation, that he was SO nervous at the drug testing he couldn't pee, but then said 'it was too cold' and he would have to 'retest'...cold pee? Or too cold in the room? He wouldn't elaberate on it. Then started crying. SO although at first I felt so bad, I then had that feeling of 'oh, crock tears here, crock tears!'....so I told him, 'look, you knew this was going to be something you HAD to do for this job." he flew out the backdoor, in the rain crying. Then a friend picked him up and I haven't heard from him since. I'm sure he is at his GF's house. BUT not for nothing, my hubby says 'are you REALLY surprised honey? I KNEW it would happen, I WAS hoping it would be different, but he KNEW and he thinks he's SO much smarter than everyone....I can't feel sorry for him." And I realized neither can I. So he blew it because he thinks he's so smart? I'm so flipping pissed off. I did tell him, oh well, then you just need to pick yourself up and either retest and be smart this time, or move on to another job. But he was having a 'pity party' for himself at the moment.

It was such a huge opportunity for him and he couldn't stay clean whether it was pot or anything else, he just couldn't do it? I told him also that he NEEDS to go to a doctor, he needs to get tested for Bi-Polar (it runs on his birth fathers side, he knows this and reFUSES to test)....he thinks it's better to self medicate? Really? I'm throwing up the white flag. He has that 'move out date' of June 24th and I'm sticking by it. He has had 2 months already to get his crap together and he is just bideing his time. And his 'nana' on his bfathers' side is SUCH a dill hole and GOD forbid his own father get on board to try to get him to go for testing and help.

I just want him to lead a 'normal' life. wouldn't it be easier to take a pill a day rather than lose a great opportunity for a great job? As Red Foreman says 'DUMB ASS'.....

He's an addict he is sick. Cold pee means he tried to use someone else's urine for the test only now a days they test the temp of urine also.
He sounds like my ex no real goals in life, a lot of I'm gonna do this and that and never does any of it. He is Borderline Personality Disorder and needs help with that but does nothing. With your son bipolar his brain chemistry is also off so instead of taking meds that will help him he self medicates with pot. It makes you sad to see the person they can be but we can't make them take the pills that really would help them.
Sorry you are going through this. Step back and except you have done all you could.

And your SO right on Katrinka. I offered to take him for the testing as it was last minute, and then he made a few calls and said his friend will drive him, he didn't want to 'bother me' with it as I had things to get done. That was MY FIRST THOUGHT 'he doesn't want ME to take him as he needs to try to fudge the test'. So I tried to push taking him and he pushed back. So at THAT point I knew, I knew in my heart of hearts. I talked to him right then and there that he needed to go to a Doctor and get tested that it would be SO simple to have the test done and get medication that will change his life for the better. That he would be able to control his issues LEGALLY. that the whole pot thing doesn't fly anymore that he should now GET it that he can't live his life like this anymore, being afraid to take a simple drug test for a job, instead he coulda been walking in with no fear and get this job if he was on medication and feeling better. He looked at me as if I was an IDIOT. Hey not for nothing, you're right, I have done EVERYTHING but drag him to the doctor, which how do I do that at his age? He seemed like he seriously thought it would work. REALLY? He was in the MILITARY, he got drug tested all the time, like he didn't KNOW how it works? That they test temp as well as content? I mean even I KNEW THAT! WTH will it take at this point? He has lost a friend to OD, he has seen the ugly side of the crap, he KNOWS that ALL companies drug test....he KNOWS it will take ONE SIMPLE PILL to help him cope with his anxiety and issues...what is SO FREAKING HARD ABOUT THIS? ARG! He is VERY sick and the sad part is, I KNOW what it is, HE knows what it is but he REFUSES to go to the DOCTOR to FIX IT! It's like being in the middle of a crowded room, screaming your lungs out and noone hears you!

Thats so frustrating! He definitely didnt want you to take him and chose his friend so he could pee for him. Obviously that backfired and sadly it cost him a really big chance at a new start because of it.

Im new here so Im sorry if you have answered these before but I this your son? If so, does he live with you? If hes old enough where you cant really intervene with his issues, what options are you left with?

This is one way they try to fake the test. Friend pee's into bag, they tape bag to leg with a tube so as to fool person into thinking they are actually peeing. So pee is temp tested and drug tested, plus pot stays in your system up to 30 days so he would of had to not be smoking for at least 30 days. There are a lot of ways they try to get test to be negative, ex tried a lot of them. One they buy this stuff at healthfood store, drink it and it will make test be negative. Cost like $60 for the stuff.
Sorry you did all you could.