Hey, contact me and let me know what meeting you are attending. I also live in boston and am looking for a good group.

i know how hard it is to talk at meetings. i have been attending alanon meeting for a few years and still have trouble talking, the great thing is that you don't have to if you don't want to. i'm learning so much from just listening to everyone else share. i talk once in a while but i am very shy and have a problem with talking in a group. The people there are so understanding and supportive i don't feel like an outsider anymore. i hope to share more now that i am more comfortable but it's nice to know that i don't have to talk if i don't want to.

Ladies, I am from Boston too! There are a lot of good meeetings around here.

I understand you are nervous... but that's just normal.. .it's unknown territory. I think it's so wonderful that you went. If you don't know what to say, you can just listen. I know people who've been silent for months before they started speaking in meetings. If all you can do is listen, that's PLENTY!!! You are already working on yourself by being there so give yourself a lot of credit for that. And remember, there are no 'musts' in Al Anon. Lots and lots of hugs for my fellows Bostonians and everybody else.. :)

Thank you all for your kind words of support. I went last night and it was very helpful. I was VERY nervous yet I did push myself to speak. Someone asked "Does the newcomer have anything to say?" I felt a little put on the spot, which was uncomfortable to say the least, but I was able to say something about the topic. I am proud of myself and hope to go back to another.

I've been going for over a year to the same meeting and I STILL feel nervous. Sometimes I get people that press me to talk. The first 10 times or so I couldn't talk without crying. I felt like the odd one out because no one else was crying... but I realize that the people there understand what you are going through and have been through. They are not judging you and it's a great forum to talk w/o advice. I know for me I often do not want to hear what I know i need to do... sometimes I just want to talk.. then you have a choice to stay after and talk it out with people or go home and think about what you've said or heard. Good luck and keep going back! It definitely gets better, although the nervousness may not go away :)

Thank you Ziggy, I found an awesome meeting today and I wish to keep going back, despite my nervousness. I will probably always be an anxious person, but it really helps to know there is a place where I CAN talk without interruption or advice if I want.

HUGS for my fellow Bostonians!

And of course, HUGS for everyone else as well!