Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group
Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...
I'm still here folks, just been busy at work.....update:
So, after having blown a WONDERFUL job opportunity, our son is washing dishes at a local restaurant that his GF works at. 3.00/hr less and seasonal... He has been working many doubles....and says she and he are looking for apt to move into, but I don't see them going TO the rentals...I keep telling him the date is June 24th that he is to be OUT of our home.
He has lost the 15th set of keys to this house and now I refuse to get him another set, which sucks because I have to stay up to let him in, I REFUSE to leave my front door open at 12 am while we sleep.
I find him VERY absent minded.....train schedules that he messes up, just easy stuff, that he is so laxidaisical (spelling?)...he is whining as he did 24 hours work in 2 days....BUT he doesn't take into account his step dad works 36 hours in 3 days and in the interim he has sleep interupted due to him coming in so late and fixing himself something to eat.
He says he is 'clean' from the big H and all that crap, but I KNOW he is still smoking pot. He says it keeps him 'balanced'.....I told him it is an EXCUSE and he needs to grow up.
I find him lying about stuff that is simple stuff, nothing major, but why the lies?
I hate to say it, but my thoughts on him are not nice, they are very angry and hurt thoughts and no matter how hard I try to curb them and try to 'understand', I can't.
He is going for his license test AGAIN and it is 1 1/2 hours away....at 1st I told him I would not take him, then in a 'good moment' told him I would, but now, I'm just done....I'll tell him I got called into work....he needs to figure out his life, I can't keep doing it for him. I'm not doing all this crap anymore with no positive outcomes.
Although on the flip side, he has been staying with his GF and her family when he has to work and if he is on a later shift, he will ride a bike to work or walk the 5 miles to work and 'per him' he makes it to work when he is supposed to.
I just am broken. He has had MORE chances in the past two months to get his act together and he keeps blowing it. It's like he doesn't WANT to make it......
I just keep plugging along. And it's hard, my job requires me to be smiling, happy and level headed, and there's times I go to a quiet location and just lose it for a couple minutes and move on.
Now my hubby has looked into an opportunity that came his way and it may include us moving out of state for a great job for him. We don't know yet what will come of it, but we did tell our son that he needs to take that date seriously and get on with his life so we can get on with ours.
One thing I am VERY thankful for is that he has not stolen from us. AT ALL! I hear the stories and it breaks my heart that someones child can get to that point.
I pray for us all everyday, multiple times a day....and I wish that drugs/alcohol will just go away, knowing it won't...but is sure is the downfall of our world.
So, after having blown a WONDERFUL job opportunity, our son is washing dishes at a local restaurant that his GF works at. 3.00/hr less and seasonal... He has been working many doubles....and says she and he are looking for apt to move into, but I don't see them going TO the rentals...I keep telling him the date is June 24th that he is to be OUT of our home.
He has lost the 15th set of keys to this house and now I refuse to get him another set, which sucks because I have to stay up to let him in, I REFUSE to leave my front door open at 12 am while we sleep.
I find him VERY absent minded.....train schedules that he messes up, just easy stuff, that he is so laxidaisical (spelling?)...he is whining as he did 24 hours work in 2 days....BUT he doesn't take into account his step dad works 36 hours in 3 days and in the interim he has sleep interupted due to him coming in so late and fixing himself something to eat.
He says he is 'clean' from the big H and all that crap, but I KNOW he is still smoking pot. He says it keeps him 'balanced'.....I told him it is an EXCUSE and he needs to grow up.
I find him lying about stuff that is simple stuff, nothing major, but why the lies?
I hate to say it, but my thoughts on him are not nice, they are very angry and hurt thoughts and no matter how hard I try to curb them and try to 'understand', I can't.
He is going for his license test AGAIN and it is 1 1/2 hours away....at 1st I told him I would not take him, then in a 'good moment' told him I would, but now, I'm just done....I'll tell him I got called into work....he needs to figure out his life, I can't keep doing it for him. I'm not doing all this crap anymore with no positive outcomes.
Although on the flip side, he has been staying with his GF and her family when he has to work and if he is on a later shift, he will ride a bike to work or walk the 5 miles to work and 'per him' he makes it to work when he is supposed to.
I just am broken. He has had MORE chances in the past two months to get his act together and he keeps blowing it. It's like he doesn't WANT to make it......
I just keep plugging along. And it's hard, my job requires me to be smiling, happy and level headed, and there's times I go to a quiet location and just lose it for a couple minutes and move on.
Now my hubby has looked into an opportunity that came his way and it may include us moving out of state for a great job for him. We don't know yet what will come of it, but we did tell our son that he needs to take that date seriously and get on with his life so we can get on with ours.
One thing I am VERY thankful for is that he has not stolen from us. AT ALL! I hear the stories and it breaks my heart that someones child can get to that point.
I pray for us all everyday, multiple times a day....and I wish that drugs/alcohol will just go away, knowing it won't...but is sure is the downfall of our world.
It does sound like he has some other issues and self medicates with the pot, but like you said in the past all he has to do is go to VA and get help. Can't make him which is too bad, because he could get on medication that will balance out his brain chemistry.
Anyways glad to hear from you.
I wouldn't tolerate pot being anywhere in my house, or let anyone stay in my house if they'd been using it. I have a zero tolerance policy - there's no such thing as a low-harm drug, in my world.
Sooner he is gone the better, why wait until 24 june.