Hi. I had joined alanon online and when my computer crashed I lost all contact. They do recommend going to face to face meetings. There is one nearby me and I keep meaning to go. They do encourage taking care of ourselves. Being a a relationship with an alcoholic I love dearly, I know how hard that that can be and all the negative comments they make can sure hurt ... hope to see you here again. God Bless and Good Luck ... wishing you well ...

www.stepchat.com
They have all kinds of online meetings.
As far as you son goes, that is how alcoholics are.. they are manipulative and self-centered. While I can have alot of sympathy for their disease, I have no sympathy for their actions. Trust me, as soon as he sees everyone in his life leaving him, he'll realize he cannot treat people like that - but it won't come until he hits bottom.
Sometimes the best thing we can do is help them hit bottom faster.
Good Luck and Stay Strong.

welcome to the group... sorry to hear about your situation. i found this site to be very helpful and comforting. maybe you will too. good luck and keep ur head up.

Hi, Cheryl. I'm sorry to hear about the situation with your son. My husband told his mother the same thing about not seeing our kids. Try not to take it to heart. He is very angry at you for putting your foot down and he just wants to say something to hurt you. You did the right thing. Hopefully he will be able to get himself some help.

You'll hear from him as soon as he needs money or something like that.
He's just talking drunken bull----.
He's trying to push your buttons and it's working.
Joe

Hi and welcome! I am proud of you for making the decisions you are I know its not easy!

While it's awful to know that others are going through the same nightmare, it's comforting to see the pattern of behavior in addicts and to begin to understand that they will say ANYTHING they can to possible hurt you and punish you for trying to help them get better--because they don't want to get better. My ex, who should finally be moving out tomorrow, who I'm still in love with but I've told him as long as he's doing drugs he can't be a part of my life, will go back and forth from understanding what I'm trying to do (which gets my guard down) to lashing out at me and telling me what an awful person I am, etc, etc. I mean, it's crazy because he's said the most horrible things to me, and conintues to say them, and they hurt like hell, and yet I still love him. I don't know what will happen to him or he'll ever clean up his act. I'm trying to finally let go of him and the hope that he'll clean up and come back. But I guess all I can really say is thank you to everyone for sharing. It's odd what a difference it makes but it's so helpful to hear other people going through the same things. I try so hard not to respond to the things he says emtionally, because it's the addict talking etc, etc, but that doesn't really make it hurt less. It is encouraging though to hear your stories and to know that I'm not completely crazy or something there are other people fighting this battle along with me and others who have fought it and come out on top. So thank you...

Hi, Sorry to here about your son, I also have a son that drinks and we have had several arguements .... I first joined Daily Strengh, when all three of my son's were drinking and taking cocaine, Luckily with my stuborn-ness and with the help of a drug unit i have sorted all but one son, the drugs have gone but my eldest still drinks and has a very bad temper with it! he say's some hurtful thing's but i have learned to let it go over my head and i dig in my heals and one day we will beat that drink, so my words to you are be strong, and words are just words he will come around and you will be there to help him! Stay strong and just be there for him!!! love momneason x