Endometriosis Support Group
Endometriosis is a common medical condition where the tissue lining the uterus is found outside of the uterus, typically affecting other organs in the pelvis. The condition can lead to serious health problems, primarily pain and infertility. A major symptom of endometriosis is pain, mostly in the lower abdomen, lower back, and pelvic area.
My sister finally had her baby today, Angelia Marie born 11-22-11 @ 1:53 am 8 lbs 6 oz 21 inches long. I was the 3rd person to hold her. My sister was in labor for 17.5 hours :( But she is sooo beautiful.
The reason I am telling you all this, is bc I need some help processing this. How can you have two sisters so different. You have my sister that has blonde hair, is about 5'4'' and has no medical problems and gets pregnant after a month of no protection.
Then you have me Black hair 5'10'' and I have Stage 3 endo that took my chances of ever having my own baby. As I held Angelia in my arms tonight, I have never felt so empty in my life. I just hate that I will never know what its like to be a mother. I will never know what its like to be pregnant. I left after just 10 min in the room, because I didnt want to cry in front of them. I got to the elevator and fell apart. I havent been able to pull it together ever since.
I dont want anyone to get me wrong, I am very happy for my sister. I just want to know if this is normal. I have never felt this useless and low before. I just wish I could give my husband and I that gift. But for some reason God has a different plan for me, I just wish I understood it better.
Thanks for Listening,
Ashley Nicole
HUGS
The reason I am telling you all this, is bc I need some help processing this. How can you have two sisters so different. You have my sister that has blonde hair, is about 5'4'' and has no medical problems and gets pregnant after a month of no protection.
Then you have me Black hair 5'10'' and I have Stage 3 endo that took my chances of ever having my own baby. As I held Angelia in my arms tonight, I have never felt so empty in my life. I just hate that I will never know what its like to be a mother. I will never know what its like to be pregnant. I left after just 10 min in the room, because I didnt want to cry in front of them. I got to the elevator and fell apart. I havent been able to pull it together ever since.
I dont want anyone to get me wrong, I am very happy for my sister. I just want to know if this is normal. I have never felt this useless and low before. I just wish I could give my husband and I that gift. But for some reason God has a different plan for me, I just wish I understood it better.
Thanks for Listening,
Ashley Nicole
HUGS
I have an aunt who loves any and all children. She has the nurturing gene something fierce and is the most maternal person I've ever known.
When she was young, she had to have an emergency hysterectomy, completely killing any chance to every have children. She's still to this day (20-some years later) devastated by it. But, she puts all of that love and care she can't give to a child into her many pets and her family.
As her niece, I've grown closer to her than any other aunt I have. We've bonded well over the years.
I say all of this because maybe you can form a special bond with your new niece to help fill that void a bit.
Congrats to your sister and best wishes!
- LL
I'm sure you will be a great auntie, just take some time to get your head straight.
Hugs,
It killed me to see her call her obnoxious. I know, new parenting is hard, but obnoxious?
My remedy, is to think about how wonderful adoption will be. My daughter may not have endo, I will choose the sex, no morning sickness. Sure, any of us would trade these things to have our own baby...but I think any one of us could take in an adopted child and be fantastic adoptive parents.
I am so much on the verge of tears even as I write this I don't know what to do.
Just in reference to your friend who had horrible morning sickness. Believe me it is very hard to be anything but pessimistic when you are vomiting all the time. I know this is probably hard to understand to someone who desperately wants children, but as a hyperemesis gravidarium (extreme sickness in pregnancy) sufferer on top of my current problems, I've been there. I said to my husband one day that I would do anything to stop the sickness. You end up not caring about the baby at all. Yes, all the negative thoughts go when the baby arrives but hyperemesis is hell on earth!
The past week has been a roller coaster of emotions for me. I had a hard time holding my niece. But I went to see her and my sister at there home, and I did a lot better. I think it was hard because she looks a bit like me. We compared my baby picture to hers and there are many similarities. I have also always had a bend in my middle finger at the top, it bends towards the ring fingers and she got that from me too. :) I have completely bonded with her, I have held her, sang to her and changed her tiny little diaper. She already has me wrapped around her finger.
I know it will all get better with time, I just wish I understood why this was happening to me.
Thank you so much for your kind words and support.
HUGS
Ashley Nicole
MOST women with endo *can* indeed have their own babies, some of us just need a little help. I have severe endo (was told I'd never conceive - that's typically older advice, younger ob/gyns don't say this) and I have 3 beautiful children. I just need progesterone shots to stay pregnant x
I am a person that believes that if god wants me to have children I will. My husband and I dont believe in IVF and even if we did our insurance doesnt cover it.
Last month, I had my right Fallopian tube removed due to an ectopic pregnancy. My right ovary is barely functioning because it had 3 baseball size tumors. My left ovary, has never worked... and trust me when I say my doctor has tried.
I have been through a lot, because it took so long to diagnose me the endo destroyed my chances. The 3 large tumors were made up of Endo.
I cant take BC in between surgeries bc my body doesnt do well with drugs. I have to allow it to grow and try to deal with the pain on a everyday basis.
I hate hearing people ask me about adoption or people saying they know couples that have never had kids and there happy. I want my own, call me selfish but I wanted my own.
I came on here to vent... but I know what options I have. But there not what I want. I just wanted God to choose me.... thats all. I wanted him to give me my own child without torturing myself with drugs and needles.
I am happy that you were able to bond with your niece. I know it is not the same but i hope you enjoy that relationship to the fullest.
love ya!