Eating Disorders Support Group

Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.

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xBlissx 10/03/2008

*May trigger - not ED related though*

I hope this post makes sense.

I'm seeing a therapist at the moment and I've recently been talking to him about how I find being around men uncomfortable etc. My Mum was in an abusive relationship and obviously I was young when everything was happening but I do remember a lot of it. Thing is...when I'm asked what it is that effects me so much, I feel like there's something else. Something else I can't talk about. When I try and talk about my feelings I get REALLY emotional. I want to cry and get very anxious.
It doesn't feel like me being a witness to what happened with my Mum should have effected me so much. I don't understand it.

Anyone have similar feelings or situations?

x-Bliss-x

deleted_user 10/03/2008

Is it possible that you were abused and have some repressed memories that are trying to come through. That's what happened to me about three months ago and I'm still in shock but working on it in therapy.

xBlissx 10/03/2008

I don't think so. If I suspected anyone it would have been the man after my Dad which means I would have been 6+ surely I would be able to remember at that age?

x-Bliss-x

deleted_user 10/03/2008

not necessarily. The existence and accuracy of repressed memories are heavily debated in the medical community (not to discredit anyone who has been through this in ANY way), but it is my understanding that they can happen at any age.

There is also a possibility that it could be repressed feelings from that time period. What you experienced when you were younger may have been too intense or complex do deal with, and perhaps it has gone unrecognized until now. I know I let feelings build up without even realizing it, sometimes for years, and it is very difficult to sort things out when I begin to "feel" again regarding a certain topic.

I hope that in time you are able to work through this with your therapist. Do you think any of the difficulty could be because he is a male?

deleted_user 10/03/2008

it is possible that something happened we usually block things out you know when we are that young and it's not abnormal but on the other hand it's also possible that it didn't happen and the neglect or abuse was mental not physical. We repress memories very well and then when we are ready to handle it it pops up in dreams or flashbacks or whatever, my abuse was mental i think but im so bad i sometimes think it must have been more but then i have the wee thoughts that is sticking with me like with dad and grandad, maybe i will never know what happened or what didn't happen i just know i need to get out of this hell you know. we need to try look at the future and never mind where it came from we need to see that we can actually have a future and try our best to get there. *hug* im thinking of you and i really hope you are going to have a good weekend

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