Eating Disorders Support Group
Eating disorders are marked by an obsessive need to control the intake and/or purging of food. This community is dedicated to those struggling on the road to recovery. Join to discuss your experience with others and find support. Get advice, ask questions, and meet others who are going through similar struggles.
I'm a college student (in my 3rd year) and have been struggling with anorexia since age 15 or so. I also have anxiety and OCD, which I've had since kindergarten. Anyway, I have really been struggling lately. At my mother's insistence, I took a medical leave from school last semester and went home to live with my Dad to focus solely on recovery. My weight was at its lowest at the time my mother insisted I leave school, and working with a dietitian and therapist, I was able to make a little progress.
Since I've been back at school though, I've been slipping, and I haven't admitted it to myself until now. My weight is back down, and I feel like I took last semester off for nothing and threw away what little progress I made. I am having the hardest time concentrating and focusing on any of my schoolwork, and I am afraid my grades are going to start dropping, which I cannot deal with because I'm a perfectionist. I'm feeling increasingly socially anxious, lonely (I don't have any friends), and so depressed. There are many days I just don't want to be alive anymore because I feel I have nothing to live for. It's incredibly selfish for me to think that because of all I've been blessed with in life, but I can't quit feeling this way.
I don't know what to do. I hate to come on here and complain, but I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. I'm just not sure where to turn anymore. I feel like I have no purpose or direction in my life. If anyone has any advice on how to keep going when all you feel like doing is giving up, I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you so much for listening.
Since I've been back at school though, I've been slipping, and I haven't admitted it to myself until now. My weight is back down, and I feel like I took last semester off for nothing and threw away what little progress I made. I am having the hardest time concentrating and focusing on any of my schoolwork, and I am afraid my grades are going to start dropping, which I cannot deal with because I'm a perfectionist. I'm feeling increasingly socially anxious, lonely (I don't have any friends), and so depressed. There are many days I just don't want to be alive anymore because I feel I have nothing to live for. It's incredibly selfish for me to think that because of all I've been blessed with in life, but I can't quit feeling this way.
I don't know what to do. I hate to come on here and complain, but I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. I'm just not sure where to turn anymore. I feel like I have no purpose or direction in my life. If anyone has any advice on how to keep going when all you feel like doing is giving up, I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you so much for listening.
Its NEVER a waste of time even if you relapse.. because overcoming anorexia is one hell of a long process and one hell of a long learning curve!!
Keep going... try and keep going at school but get help while you are there (sometimes taking time off to concentrate on getting better means you have more time... too much time... to focus on not eating and weight etc)
Your just on a low right now... it wont last, as long as you KEEP fighting it!!
Keep fighting hun xxx
The steps you made when you were making progress the 1st time are the same steps you should take again, but this time, stick with it, give yourself a chance to adapt. Keep talking to the people you trust, and even teachers at school, to help you with your work. They will know how to help you get back to better grades. At time goes on, you'll fin it easier to focus..
And you dont need to thank people for listening, it's why DS is here. Though it's very polite of you lol Good luck
sarasota34233: It's good to hear that things can get better...I need to always remember that because when I get stuck in these slumps, I sometimes feel as if there's no way I'll ever be able to pull myself out. I am fortunate enough to be seeing a therapist at school (my dad is helping me with copays), but I haven't looked into groups at school. I should do that though. I went to an ANAD group a few times, but they had to cancel it for now. And thank you so much again for taking the time to message me the other day.
EmmaLouize: Thank you for your encouragement, and for the reminder about focusing on the steps I'm able to take forward, instead of just focusing on the negatives. I completely agree with you on your point about taking time off. I found that for me, it did no good because I had MORE time to obsess about food. You couldn't have said it more perfectly. Thanks again,
jonroland: I do hope there will be a time when I can look back and be thankful that I got through this. I will certainly try to take the same steps I did when I made progress in the past...if I could do it once, I should be able to do it again, right? Thank you again so much for your support.